16/02/04

well - things went a lot better (in the important ways) than foreseen. she made the right choice, which i did NOT feel i had any right to push her towards, and we're sticking together. her father's just going to have to learn to deal with it.
somehow.
this guy has a serious issue with all this. whatever - so we'll have a "family" squabble. it happens.
especially in jewish families. it's a throwback of the whole guilt thing.

things are going to be weird for a while - what happened was extremely painful for both of us, and it did a lot of damage.

*** yesterday ***

at 2am i was at SxS's place, about to begin smoking myself to sleep (i was really upset), when she called to say that she couldn't bear to be alone. so she picked me up, and we went to my place, and slept.

it was all very strange - we were so comfortable together, but were trying to not be together as a couple. this is not a healthy exercise.

she left around noon, and i went to tel-aviv to pick up some cd's from karnaf.

we had a freaky moment at his place - he took a cd out and told me that it wasn't trance, but that i'd probably like it. i hadn't seen the cover, and i told him that my favourite cd of all time is olive - extra virgin, and that it took me years to get hold of it, during which i'd been pining for it.
he showed me the cd cover, which was olive - extra virgin.
freaky.

anyway, we had a good lunch, and went to the park to play frisbee. it was fun.
got my mind off things for a bit.

afterwards, i went back home, got my taekwondo gear, and went to SSSO's place to drop off some cd's, and we talked for about twenty minutes about the complete and utter rediculousness of her and my situation.

i went to training, which was pretty good - i got the punching bag to myself for a few minutes, in a closed room, and i went absolutely crazy, letting out a lot of the frustration of the whole story.

i actually did some damage to my hands, and got friction burns on my feet, from hitting the bag so quickly and so furiously...

the highlight of the session was the stretching: our master stretched me personally, twice, and the second time she pushed me hard enough to make me panic, and almost enough to make me cry. it was really intense, but i feel SO good about it now.
sore, but good.

after training, i got an sms from her to say that she'd decided that we weren't breaking up.
at least her mom is supportive of us.

i went home, had a hot shower, and then we went to tel aviv, to a really uptown sushi bar. the sushi was good, and not too expensive: we were pleasantly surprised, and walked out completely stuffed.

*** today ***

we went hunting through the coffee shops looking for strawberries and cream, of which there was none, and eventually gave up and sat down for coffee.

i drove us home, my first non-driving-exam experience on an israeli highway, which wasn't very interesting, and i'm typing this before hitting the sack - i'm bombed.