payoff

tuesday night:

i finally managed to coax the deployment to succeed, but without a sense of success.

wednesday:

the day began with me learning that i hadn't been invited to the previous night's deployment debriefing, and i suspected that that was intentional on skippity's part to prevent me raising a bunch of issues he knew shouldn't have been. so i awkwardly gatecrashed, and took a number of opportunities to interrupt with my opinions.

it was entirely gratifying to get so much enthusiastic support from the other participants, and i felt really validated for jumping in because nobody else was saying what i was saying.

i had a potentially "final straw" moment with bigtalk, discovering once again that in spite of the extremely explicit ticket and discussion around it, he still hadn't followed the instructions. "you never said that!" he responded, at which point i showed him exactly how it was written in the ticket. "oh."

anyway, by the time the day was over, after a few more iterations, we considered his work ready to merge and we pulled the trigger. the first thing i did after he left was ask a couple of other devs to give it a try, and before i left i'd opened a PR for some minor improvements, but by and large we'd crossed the line and were ready to move on to the next thing.

which made me super nervous, because the next thing is the really hard thing.

gd and my mom made pastries with "chunk" fake meats for dinner. it's creepily close to a real meat experience.

yesterday:

the work day began with a pleasant conversation with skippity that made me feel like there were no hard feelings, and then i synced with bigtalk to make sure he understood what was required of him. i think it's understandable how skeptical i was feeling.

the day was overall pretty productive, with lots of noise (a fair amount of good noise) and a lot of me actively protecting bigtalk from distractions.

an hour before happy hour, bigtalk stood up and announced that he was done with his proof of concept.

i literally didn't believe him.

i sat next to him, he walked me through what he'd done and how he'd done it, and i was literally stunned, half disbelieving and half almost in tears (of joy and relief).

for me, the rest of the day was a celebration. i made sure that bigtalk understood what a big deal this is, and i discussed the implications with anyone who showed even the remotest interest, and i made sure that our boss was in on how things are going.

it feels like after a week (or few) of stress and suffering, we finally got a massive payoff.

i got home, walked with my mom and mr smear to the liquor store (rum and gin, and whiskey for a gift), and got home to another pastry dinner (everyone's really excited about vegan pastries, while mr smear is concerned about becoming chubby).

today:

gd's at her sewing lesson, we're off now to my surgeon appointment for my ingrown toenail while i feel like i'm recovering from a hard night of i-shouldn't-have-had-alcohol-with-my-antibiotics indigestion and fatigue.

but i feel good about how this week concluded. really, really good.

gimme an f

 yesterday:

the clinic told me i had to make a doctor's appointment, so i did. then i went to the pain clinic and got gd's appointment moved. then i walked through the sarona market to get to the office, stopping to pick up a coffee and help someone with a demo along the way, and picking up potato spice and two bottles of scorpion pepper sauce.

most of yesterday's work was shit, our security team's boss invented some really stupid manual work in the name of compliance and i spent half my day cloning vaults secret by secret.

in addition to that, i supported my teammates and realigned (again) with bigtalk.

i rushed out at 5.30pm, in time to get home and hear gd throwing a kitchen tantrum about mayonnaise. i went out for a walk with my mom and mr smear, and we ended up on a shopping mission for vegan mayonnaise with mixed success.

then we came home, had a really nice dinner, followed by a massive fight about the mayonnaise (okay, that's not fair - it was about what the mayonnaise represents, including the fact that gd is *really* not interested in being vegan and it's not just about eggs) and going to bed was a pretty bitter affair.

today:

and then i woke up around midnight in pain, and couldn't get it out of my head that i haven't had a decent night's sleep in years because gd refused to sleep in two separate beds when the only beds she can sleep in actively hurt me.

i spent the rest of the night on the couch, only some of which i slept through.

i had a bunch of stuff to do in the morning, some of which got done, and gd and i had a Talk and we've both got stuff to process.

then i went to the office and had a really difficult experience with bigtalk, who *still* hadn't understood what it was i expected from him. and when he did finally understand, he realized why i'd told him a week ago that it should have taken a few hours and he was over-engineering the solution.

with great pain, i took him aside and explained to him exactly what i wanted, finally got him to agree, then wrote out a particularly explicit ticket and made sure he understood what it's instructing him to do. then i began working on the next ticket, which we'll make sure to talk through before he begins.

oh, boy.

i was then sent on a hunt for a computer that doesn't exist to support a new surprise urgent installation, after which i had to leave to get the dentist for a first aid appointment.

the dentist took some x-rays, then showed me where both sides of my mouth have urgent filling issues. then i rushed off to get full imaging done (14 very uncomfortable plates), then i came home and had lunch, worked a little and then returned to the clinic for the ingrown toenail appointment. now i have two sets of antibiotics, a useless piece of cotton wool under my toenail (it's not the front edge of the toenail that's a problem), and another appointment to make.

on the way home i received a call from skippity, who's having trouble with a deployment and who's actively making things worse for himself and everyone he brings in to try and fix it.

at the same time, another deployment has been going wrong so i tried to take it over, but after more than two hours i'm at a loss as to where the real issue is and i'm struggling to really care.

and all throughout this i was supporting one of our external contractors. and having to push hard to get mr smear to do his reading homework with me.

i'm so over today.

script flip

 i got up early later, made myself a coffee and walked it to the bus stop. shortly into the ride a man came in and sat down across from me with a smell that made it hard to breathe. he got off one stop before me.

i walked in, picked up my repaired computer (i haven't tested it yet), walked out, and caught the bus home. an easier ride.

i got home just in time to leave for work. i arrived at work just before bigtalk, and didn't have time to worry about talking to my boss before he made me feel like he'd been working hard all weekend, and he explained what had happened on thursday, and i no longer felt like that was the problem.

what followed, though, was a day that felt very long, a lot of it me trying to align him with the task requirements. it was the middle of the afternoon by the time i felt he'd understood the requirements, and by the end of the day he was pretty much done, albeit with an insane bug that i feel pretty confident his reliance on AI support was preventing him from resolving 🤦

someone else said it yesterday: AI makes you feel like you're getting things done faster, but you're actually not. my experience is that i feel like it's slowing me down on anything more interesting than a trivial solution.

aside from that, i babysat an external contractor's efforts to migrate his cloudformation to pulumi - it wasn't easy, but i am pretty confident that pulumi is the right choice after all.

as usual, at around 5.30/6pm urgent things began to fall apart. some of my coworkers have been complaining about ridiculous build times, and suddenly i started experiencing them too. instead of the usual minute or two, my build took 35 minutes, and its subsequent deploy broke on contact.

frustrated, as much by the build time as by not being able to have dinner with my family, i went to our warehouse to be on the same physical network as the machine i was deploying to, only to discover that one of my coworkers who has a tendency to skip important steps [skippity] moved the server from our installation desks that i set up last week to a power point connected to the lights, and the cleaning lady had finished up and turned off the lights just before my deployment started 🤦

you can't make this up.

i was furious.

while waiting for him to join me, i tried re-logging in to werf on a whim, and suddenly the build times dropped back to normal. it turns out that instead of throwing an error like it used to, it simply runs retry behavior repeatedly and then fails silently. so even when we thought it was eventually working, it wasn't 🤦

omfg.

after moving the installation back to a safe power point, i learned that skippity hadn't configured the router correctly and nothing would have worked anyway 🤦

finally, after a further half hour spent trying and failing to connect the machine through the router, i plugged in "directly" and began the deployment. that was when he stood up and announced that he had to go because his family would be upset with him... like mine wouldn't?

jesus, fuck.

anyway, i finally got the deployment done and went to pick up my bag. two of my bosses (founder and direct report) were still in, and i let them know what i'd just been through. i ended up having an open discussion with my direct report about bigtalk, we shared different concerns and i walked out feeling much better having said what needed to be said.

i came home, my mom prepared me an emergency gin and tonic and i at least got to say goodnight to mr smear.

...

it's demo day (no. 1), i've slept alright and i'm on my way to postpone gd's nerve block again and try and make an appointment for a surgeon for my ingrown toenail.