sweaty in sheep's clothing

örmagörd.

it's soooooo hot. and we only have one fan, it's in the bedroom. i'm standing here with the window and door open to the night air and i'm sweating bullets.

after a great weekend, i went into work today and found myself very comfortable indeed. it's a great environment, the conditions are excellent and my team members? very smart, and very chilled. and even if they weren't i would be making the best of it, but i hope my first impression lasts. the funny thing is that one of the reasons i'm so at home is because it's just like the army: a big company with more bureaucracy than employees. very dilbert, without a very NOT-pointy-haired boss. very i-can-handle-this-shit.

---friday:

i performed my duties while gd watched half of american: the bill hicks story. we sat down to eat, all excited about watching the amazing spiderman 2 on crackle, but it was just the trailer. it should have said TRAILER, then. bastards!

so we watched bad boys instead, learning the ads by heart as they each repeat three or four times every twenty minutes.

---saturday:

waking up was tough, and "ghetto shaving" without water wasn't actually as bad as i thought it'd be. the craigslist guy delayed my exit because he woke up too late to meet at our appointed time and i had shit to do. after making me wait for ages the day before, he should have been too embarrassed to screw that up :/

i made my appointment just on time, the consultation was brief and not particularly enlightening. my neck was too tanned to get started with the treatment, though, so i made an appointment for three weeks' time and i'm supposed to be exceedingly careful about staying out of the sun. i've had more exposure with less protection in the two days since than in a long time, which is kinda embarrassing...

i picked up a coffee bodum to replace gd's nail-you-in-the-hand one, met the craigslist dude for a smooth handover and slumped on the couch for more ffix. that damned grotto is mean! but after a few attempts (and, i'm ashamed to admit, a quick glance at a walkthrough) i got through to the boss and he's waiting for me for next time.

i left home late to meet vfmp and his boyfriend, and arrived with about three minutes to spare - talk about cutting it close. half an hour later we were in the suburbs (west island), enjoying a beautiful afternoon with badger and co in the swimming pool, stuffing ourselves on a great vegan barbeque and then losing myself in the jacuzzi. i've got to get us a hot tub. i felt like i'd returned to the womb, i don't remember when last i relaxed so perfectly! high on a hot tub, i was.

badger's dogs (boxers) are wonderful, one of her friends broke the ice by farting loudly as she joined us poolside (she's pregnant), and all around everyone was nice and interesting. the music was good too, it turns out that badger's into good trance :)

i was disappointed when gd called to say she couldn't make it, but not surprised. her timing was excellent, though, because the guys were just leaving so we all went together. gd and i had an evening of bad boys and massages. not quite as good as a jacuzzi, but certainly nothing to complain about.

---yesterday:

there was a scary freak-out at 1am caused by a leg cramp, followed by deep dreaming and stunningly restful sleep. newk'd and his girlfriend came over for haircuts and i taught them both the basics of tekken, and it was gratifying to see them both get it and to see her beat him in a close round :D

we left for yoga in the park, and our exit was plagued by not-a-comedy of errors. our spirits and tensions bobbed up and down until we got to the park, where we met up with horseman and gd's best friend and did some really hard yoga that had at least two of us feeling all bubbly and good afterwards!

i tried really hard to avoid the sun but even my oversized hat couldn't protect me; we made our way to see great friends of gd's who i hadn't met yet and our first stop was a new vegan place that had just closed for the afternoon. fortunately they have a car, so we drove over to aux vivres which is always full of win.

the couple is fascinating, he's a writer and she's a producer / director / artist, and he's also slowly becoming a well-respected self-taught physicist. we all talked for hours, my brain was really flexing and being stretched and it was so nice to feel like it was mutual!

after they left, gd made delicious noodles, we watched about half of men in black 3 and then quickly passed out.

---today:

no snooze for you! gd was having none of it. i crawled out of bed, did the dishes and made breakfast, then climbed into an argument of gd's because a "friend" of hers kept attacking her for having a different view of what's happening in the middle east. i'd post here what i wrote but i've already said that i'm done for now, though it's a relief that instead of fueling the fire what i wrote managed to get her to back off.

...

dressing like a grown-up sucks, but i'm very fond of gd's drawing for the day which is of me dressed up as a capital letter.

[revenge exit difficulty]

i left a little later than i'd planned, and was horrified to see 18 minutes till the next metro written on the display! fortunately they'd gotten it wrong and just before i gave up and rushed off to find a cab the next one entered the station. i could NOT be late for my first day.

inside the metro and out, i was sweaty in my sheep's clothing. in spite of that, i felt good and confident with the orientation. i would spend the rest of the day setting up my dev station and learning the ropes. one of those ropes was finding lunch, and after a couple of failed searches i ended up walking all the way to my old supermarket. we have no freezers, so i'll have to pick up a frozen meal every day and the walk takes a good chunk of my lunch hour...

it's a nice excuse to walk outside, but there was a lot of sun and i was unprotected :(
and for some reason my liver was hurting me. i suspect dehydration. at least once i got back i learned where the coffee and purified water are located.

i returned sweaty after my walk and then proceeded to nuke my lunch; when i opened it and the steam hit my face things got even worse! once i got back upstairs, i made a point of going around my team and inspecting them for dress code. tomorrow, i'm going in wearing shorts and a t-shirt :)

i walked out feeling like i'd have to be a complete asshole to be fired. i mean, i'm competent and professional, they're easy-going people and i only have to do my job. which looks interesting and challenging enough.

...

i stopped by walmart to finally pick up sunscreen, tried and failed to find a good sports bag and saw a sign that said $7 for badminton sets. gd wants to play, so i thought "how convenient!", picked up a set and went to pay. i was not pleasantly surprised when the bill came to $10 more than i was expecting, and after waiting for a manager for ages and then dragging him back to the source of the trouble we discovered that some asshole had thrown a completely different (much higher quality) badminton set in the wrong rack.

jolly good :/

...

i came home, went for a good run and sat down to a feast gd had prepared. neither of us had the energy to watch much, having to fold laundry and make the bed was a bit of a buzz-kill and i really shouldn't be drinking beers in the middle of the week. i had shit to do.

but at least i've written this, right?

supertongue montreal introduction - part i

so we didn't get her montreal bagels or smoked meat. and the poutine apparently wasn't all that.

the itinerary:

friday the 13th

x 6.40am pickup
x home, shower, food
x keys for duplication
x underground downtown
x plateau / mont royal record stores
x boxing
x party

saturday

x blood donation
x brunch
- foufounes électriques
x the village

sunday

x atwater market
x old montreal
- parc la fontaine
x mont royal
x tam tams
x l'artère

the details

friday:

i knew it was going to be a rough weekend, but i'm pretty sure it didn't need to start with four hours of painful restlessness; my brain as much to blame as my restless legs.

the cruel, wet friday morning saw me yawning while i waited at the bus station, sitting with everything i needed to be productive except motivation.

introducing supertongue to my place, non-stop debating.

a phone call from revenu québec informing me that my file had been processed, which i already knew because they'd sent me the amount owed.

going to gd's work to pick up her keys, making copies for myself.

trying and failing to walk downtown because a horrible downpour forced us underground.

jugo juice shake fail. supertongue speaks french fluently, apparently the guy working there doesn't.

both exhausted, we headed back to my apartment to rest. and watch 20 years of ufc, so it was only a kind-of rest. it's a must-watch!

i was disappointed to see that instead of the weekend being a shitty day followed by two decent days, it would be two shitty days followed by a decent day. not cool.

i went to gd's apartment - now dubbed "home" - to test my new keys, and passed out on the couch. a nap becomes the deepest slumber when there's a time limit! i woke up still in dream-space, with reality seeming distorted and in a distinctly altered state of mind. so much so that i questioned my own sense of self as i made my way to the metro.

i was upset by my kickboxing coach posting the following:
"how a female dresses is her advertisement. if a female shows half of her body, she's asking to be disrespected."
really? if you think that, you're an asshole. what i really wanted to ask him was if his wearing fighting shorts is his way of asking to be disrespected... unfortunately, i can't say anything without messing with our instructor / student relationship so i have to keep my disrespecting his opinions to myself.

gd was going to join us at the fights, and she'd told me she'd be done in forty five minutes so supertongue and i went to her work to wait for her. forty five minutes turned into ninety minutes, and then gd became impatient with our impatience and it was supposed to be a fun evening. if i had known beforehand we would have gone straight there and asked gd to join us, and she probably would have bailed because until we were almost there she didn't actually realize that we were going to see live fights and not just watch something at a sports bar :S

we struggled to find dinner on the way, experienced taxi drama because the cab we ordered didn't arrive even though his gps signal said we were on the same intersection and eventually arrived after intermission, having missed three of my gym buddies in the ring.

$%!@.

at least there were some good second-half bouts.

saturday:

supertongue and i went to hot sauce, a lesbian party, to introduce her to the scene. the bouncer was a short, dumpy angry girl who tried very hard to keep me out in spite of the fact that i was accompanied by a woman and had paid entrance. the music was eclectic and eardrum-damaging loud, but overall the party was good and we spent a fun hour or two on the dancefloor.

the nightbus was simple enough, we ran a stupid-a.m. poutine mission (i picked up deliciously greasy salt and vinegar fries) and we crashed at my apartment around 4.30am.

...

at 9am i got up half-asleep. i was excited to see the first pieces of work on my comics, then woke supertongue up and we took a long metro ride all the way to radisson. napping well along the way.

jesus, the toilets are badly situated! the designer of the mall should be seated on the sherbrooke end, fed fast-acting laxatives and kicked hard in the shins as he gets up to go.

my first canadian blood donation on behalf of vfmp was friendly and pleasant. and i was so pleased that i didn't pass out! the point of the donation was to be part of an effort to convince the canadian government that screening sexually active male homosexuals is stupid.

there was some awkwardness with supertongue and the guys, but not too much. we headed out before them to meet up at aux vivres, and we'd almost boarded the metro when i realized that i'd left my jacket behind. that was close!

we visited a record store on mont royal that gave me the wanna-buy blues.

aux vivres: the food was delicious as always, supertongue and i went halves on blueberry pancakes and chana "sandwiches". there was decadent overeating, funny chatter and a gorgeous blonde waitress who seemed quite into me; i wanted to wingman for supertongue and see if i couldn't refocus the waitress' attentions but i don't think i have what it takes :P

we went to jean talon market, milled around and then decided to split up and rest because we were both exhausted. i woke up just before gd's station with a start as the metro jolted sharply before stopping, otherwise i might have missed it :P

i didn't exactly rest, but i did end up feeling much better. hummus on top of chana on top of supertongue's mother's amazing home-made hummus seemed like a bad idea, but i only thought that through after eating :(

it took a while to wake supertongue up by phone, and we agreed to meet up at berri-uqam. when i left i realized just how tired i was and worried that my lightheadedness was caused by too much post-donation exercise. it was a gorgeous post-rain dark-blue dusk.

we visited a really cool little live acts pub across the road from the station, then walked around trying to find a cash machine. the village was disappointingly quiet, so that sucked, but we got to see a bit of a great performance that was part of les francofolies. we walked all the way up st laurent, seeing rory macdonald win his fight along the way, and arrived at mont royal quite late. plan b (the bar) really was our plan b.

and that was the end of our night.

*my* night ended with ice cream and chocolate before bed.

sunday:

in spite of sleeping well, i was still buggered. gd and i had a good, late morning while supertongue didn't answer her phone - i was just about to go over and check on her, worrying that she hadn't made it home or something, when she finally responded.

my mom and i had a fight over skype - i think it was over how i'm dealing with my employer's silence over my papers.

i carved up a watermelon but had to abandon it to pick supertongue up from the metro; it was a glorious day, and the spores kind of made it feel like it was snowing. we demolished the watermelon when we got back.

supertongue and i had an argument with gd's friend who'd come over for a haircut, who's an anti-vaxxer. gd kept to the sidelines and although things got pretty heated i think it went okay.

i took supertongue for a walk along the lachine canal and through atwater market before we headed to old montreal, where she decided that she does, in fact, want to move here. it was a great day to visit the old port, and we caught a bit of a science show for kids that was a lot of fun. and made us both feel good about our french :P

[continued...]

still skew

... although i made it out to aux vivres to meet vfmp, his boyfriend and a friend of theirs. we've been talking about brunch there for months, and the blueberry pancakes truly are brilliant!

now if only i hadn't tripped up the steps at the metro in the middle of a bustling crowd. that was a bit embarrassing :$

...

gd has just discovered that one of her co-workers has been stealing her clients, and it looks like they're dealing with him. her stories really do make me question the locals' integrity - there're so many of them! and that's ignoring all the big stories about corruption etc.

---if our paving becomes a battle between kinetic rubber and solar roadways*, rollerbladers are going to lose out no matter who wins. but everything else will be awesome, so maybe we'd better figure out a way to make all-terrain rollerblades?

* they're most of the way there with a week to go! go on, put some cash in!

10 things that the people who love their lives are doing differently is on point.

here's a wonderful poem about english pronunciation. i learned a thing or two, actually.

holo-lambos??? SIIIIIIICK!!!

zen and martial arts before snowboarding - part i

what a crazy weekend! i'm gonna try to fit this post into as short a time as possible so that i can get something done today. it was supposed to be a study day...

---friday:

after four hours of sleep i popped awake seconds before my alarm sounded. i quickly prepared and left for the mountain. i finished reviewing the book on the metro, then spent half an hour in the bus terminal in a zombie state. the hour or so sleeping on the bus wasn't bad at all, but the few minutes i spent trying to use the toilet on board were a nightmare: the bus driver was being really aggressive on the accelerator and brakes, and at one point i found myself forced against the soap dispenser for about ten or twenty seconds and by the time gravity switched to me holding my weight with the top of my head pressed to the opposite wall my back had been soaked.

the words that popped into my head were "die in a fire", which i immediately regretted as the bastard dying in a fire might include everyone else on his bus...

---what a wonderful friday morning! the weather was excellent, the conditions excellent and there were barely any people on the slopes. i enjoyed a groovy morning but my legs were stiff and sore from thursday night's kickboxing. i only tried hitting the moguls once, because i was too tired to handle them properly and switching was an effort... but it didn't matter, i was having great high-speed fun without all that :)

my cafeteria french had improved slightly, lunch was delicious. i tried to study some discrete maths but experienced a profound exhaustion that saw me slipping in and out of consciousness in the warm sunlight streaming through the windows. eventually i felt ready to go out again and had a perfect afternoon! all the time on the slopes was amazing and even riding up the lifts was awesome, it felt like chilling on a bench in the summer with a beautiful view. very cool.

when i returned for a quick break i found the area outside packed with people sunning themselves and decided to join them. it was so warm that i lay back on one of the chairs stripped down to my t-shirt, and when i closed my eyes i felt like i was lying on a beach in twenty degree weather with a cool breeze; boy, was i ever surprised to look at my phone and find it telling me that it was only one degree! the first week of spring in canada meme is totally accurate :P

i would've stayed, but after about ten minutes i remembered that i didn't have any sunscreen and i didn't really want to get burned.

the last runs were crazy, i kept choosing paths that kept me totally high on adrenaline and i had a few fun wipe-outs. on my last ski lift ride i tried responding to the guy next to me in french but he pitied me and switched to english... he was intrigued that i'm interested in aerospace, told me the name of the company he works for and told me to get my resume to him. nice!!!

...

après ski after a long day: beer and maths don't mix. instead, i spent the hour relaxing cross-eyed or playing another crime solved, then enjoyed a chilled walk through the now-melting snow to the bus. the sunset was perfect, the day had been glorious ^_^

i could neither sleep nor concentrate on the make-out bus - i was surrounded by cute couples - so i spent it staring out the window and thinking lightly.

big dinner. tom segura: completely normal is hysterical, and highly recommended. jasper redd: jazz talk not so much. fp came over and we watched three episodes of firefly. it was awesome.

---yesterday:

i was exhausted and a bit sore from the day's exercise, so i probably shouldn't have invested more time in another crime solved before going to bed.

after a week of horrid sinus issues i'd finally had a clear few days; i was *not* impressed to suddenly find myself stuffy again. i medicated before going to sleep, and woke up with my nose and throat both disgustingly uncomfortable again. i medicated some more, and since then i've been kinda okay...

fp picked me up in the late morning and we drove through to morin heights. the driving conditions were awful, and the long drive was mostly a bit awkward. one would expect that after a week or two of dating that that wouldn't be the case. just saying.

morin heights is cool, but a bit crowded on saturdays. their facilities aren't as good as saint sauveur's, either. their lifts suck, they're aggressive and frustrating and it's far too easy to end up on a stranger's lap :$
having said that, there was more snow there than i've seen all winter and some of the slopes are really, really great! overall, we had a fantastic time and the only thing that detracted from that was us talking so much during a break that we missed out on quite a few runs. not that that wasn't enjoyable, though, so it was really all good :)

...

i barely had time to shower and eat before skipping out again to go to badger's album launch. i got in just in time for the first song, after which i wondered into the depths of club soda to see if anyone would recognize me (it was dark). after a while vfmp and his boyfriend rocked up, just as the second song began.
seeing badger singing on stage was very strange; in my head she's the woman who's teaching me how to fight, and the juxtaposition is jarring.
we were enjoying badger's groovy lounge (very 80's), and suddenly there were a bunch of people close to the stage who started dancing. vfmp's boyfriend dragged the two of us down to join them and i spent the rest of the performance feeling very conspicuous indeed.

anyway, it was a nice vibe and a fun evening. we didn't stay for the afterparty as it was a bit too "lesbian disco" (disco's cool, but the songs the dj was playing really weren't our cup of tea) so we said our hi's and goodbyes before missioning to aux vivres for a delicious and entertaining end to the evening. i was completely bombed by the time we got on the metro to head home, and by the time i arrived i simply shambled into bed.

[continued...]

distractions - part ii

[... continued]

about halfway through the night i registered that the boxing ring was set up in an emptied swimming pool. awesome!

the first fight was a bit weird, because after all the show of the pre-fight ceremony the guys barely moved. i expect people who weight 40lbs less than me to be quicker and more intense than me, not slower.

in one of the fights a combatant was doing a kind of mma hand-waving thing that's entirely inappropriate for muay thai. his opponent was so much better than him that in the middle of a round he made fun of him by doing the same hand motions. it was bizarre.

one of the fights was a kid we've all seen at the gym but who none of us have seen sparring. he trains with his shirt on, so we were all shocked when he stepped into the ring looking like he'd been drawn in a comic book. huge pecs and tiny waist, but he'd obviously been skipping leg day. friends don't let friends skip leg day.
his opponent was obviously high level and super-aggressive, and i was blown away by how quickly this dude recovered, figured his shit out and proceeded to dish out punishment. he didn't look like he had it in him!

one of the fighters i was really looking forward to was the guy who took our class a couple of weeks ago, and we were disappointed because while he did a good job, he barely used his legs! it turned out later that his opponent was so tough that after one or two kicks he understood that they'd be totally ineffectual and so he focused on the guy's face. that's hardcore, it's not like there could have been a significant weight difference.

the jolly moroccan: he had a good fight, but i was expecting fireworks. it was exciting, but not as exciting as i expected :(

the last couple of fights on the card were great, and really brought the night to a close on a good note.

...

i travelled most of the way home with one of the guys i train with, and we talked non-stop until parting company. i ate and watched freaks and geeks, then went straight to bed.

---today:

i slept late and woke up still really tired. i broke another glass this morning... one of the new, thicker ones. dammit :(
at least it didn't shatter.

i started posting and suddenly found myself running late for my date! and of course, there's nothing like running late and then just missing the metro. fortunately, even with the combined transportation delays i was only fifteen minutes late.

---the date:

it was immediately apparent, and i mean within a second of seeing her, that she's not my type. we met at myriade, a small connoisseurs coffee shop near guy-concordia, and the coffee was AMAZING. after sorting mine out i sat down across from her and we began chatting; for the first few minutes all i could think about was whether i should be cutting the date short instead of wasting our time. after a few minutes, though, i started trying to find her attractive (nonsensical, i know), because i really, really wanted to. to justify that, neither of us noticed the three hours that flew by as we discussed psychology, society and culture, the academy, performances, politics and language... she's interesting and engaging and awesome!

i hope we can be friends, and by that i mean that i hope i'm wrong about the look she gave me when we said goodbye - a look that i read as a hurt "shit, you're not into me". i feel really bad about that.

---otherwise, it was a beautiful afternoon and well spent! i didn't have much time to rest before the poetry slam, so i settled on watching the guild while hurriedly eating. season 7 is available on netflix! sweet :)

the crap news, though is that the filling that's been giving me trouble since the dentist had his way with it? the one that i haven't been able to eat with? well, i felt and heard something crack today, and now it's sensitive to everything. *LONG STRING OF EXPLETIVES DELETED HERE*

...

i rushed off to sign up, arriving late but in time. i met a couple of other poets and we entertained each other non-stop. horseman, newk'd, newk'd's girlfriend and friend showed up soon after everything began, and i must say that it was quite a relief to have support :)

---i went with preacher. apparently my performance was spot on, except for the very last word... it's like they keep shouting in the gym: "finish strong! finish strong!" - fail :(
but shit happens.

i didn't make it to round two, unfortunately - i guess the judges didn't like my style, but what was really moving for me was the rest of the audience's reaction; to know that there were people that i actually managed to touch to the point of yelling and cheering mid-performance, and to get such a warm response from random strangers afterwards was amazing! ^_^

i could yell "i was robbed" until i was blue in the face; i know how hard it is to judge and how subjective it is, and i'll just have to hope that my attempt next month manages to blow them away.

---newk'd and girlfriend and i went to aux vivres for dinner, eating and talking until they kicked us out. i've spent a little time on another case solved, and now that i've posted i'm going to hit the hay. i need to get cracking on my interview preparation in the morning.

---this article on time management covers me and distractions.

this old lecture on vegans and heart disease is still relevant. long, but full of interesting information. if you want a summary, though, eat ground flax and take b12 supplements.

return to the poutine routine - part iii

[...continued]

berri uqam station was filled with people on their way to igloofest. i was dressed for it, i had my board strapped to my back, and a part of me really wanted to join them! but partying while sore wasn't going to work.

---sunday:

i woke up jet-lag early (why did i not think to use my melatonin tablets?!) to an email from the accountant informing me that it appears that i owe a large sum of money to the tax authority even without the fine for late filing. considering my status as unemployed and trying to keep everything together long enough to get a job offer and pass the french exam, that was quite unsettling :S

he asked for a couple of other documents and i was looking for them when i discovered a digitization of something related that i'd forgotten i'd made before leaving... he responded with an apology for such a bad start to the day and with an update that it now looks like they owe me a sizable sum. that just made my day!!!

i finished watching the first episode of downton abbey, and i now understand why everyone loves it so much. why can't all series hire good writers? the characters are wonderful and the plots satisfyingly subtle. nice!

a guy i went to school with came over to pick up something his mother had asked me to deliver; he told me he didn't have time for coffee or tea, but he apparently did have half an hour to stand with me in the foyer talking uncomfortably loudly. a part of my discomfort concerned bothering my neighbours, and another part his pride in generally being a bit dodgy.

i headed to godmother's to print, sign and scan what i hope is a final piece of the tax authority puzzle (hooray for technology! he says sarcastically), then met up with horseman for subway and starbucks. happily he's keen to speak to me in french, but that really did make things complicated...

on the metro to have drinks and play carcassonne with vfmp's brother (mustwin) who's recovering from an appendectomy, i sat across from a guy who looked familiar. i didn't recognize him even after he told me where i know him from, i was embarrassed... but not as embarrassed as when i exited the car and it all came rushing back to me - we trained a fair amount together, talked quite a bit *and* he's friends with gg :$

i beat mustwin. i was prouder of that than i'm proud to admit :P

i made an inefficient choice when taking the metro to the fight night, but it afforded me an opportunity to help a little old lady with some heavy lifting. i think i managed to hide my limp as i lugged her baggage up the stairs :)

the fight night was great! firstly, i didn't make the mistake of taking a date along so i got to really focus on what was happening in the ring. the guy i sparred with before i left was doing security, he took up a position next to me and so we shared running commentary. the guy i really went to watch, who lost his first fight, came out strong in his second and was deservedly ecstatic when he stepped out victorious. the guy i was sure would get knocked out was knocked down twice in the first round and the referee called a stop to it; he really wasn't ready. certainly not ready enough to be coming in with a nickname like "the hebrew hammer", you have to win a fight before you get cocky, bro...

our coach had accepted a fight last-minute the day before, and it was interesting to finally see him in action. i'll be honest, i kinda expected more but it was a good fight nonetheless and he had a tough opponent. exciting shit happened in the ring, overall it was satisfying.

vfmp made it for the last three fights, afterwards we went to aux vivres for dinner. the conversation went deep into zombie-theory territory, and i wished i'd been recording because he was playing devil's advocate and i couldn't keep track of all the questions that i should definitely answer if i do end up writing a book.

---yesterday:

oh, couch, i love you! i was too tired to shower, i barely had strength to brush my teeth before flopping down fully clothed and waking up feeling like a new man in the morning. i spent the morning figuring out french exams and courses and things, then shopped, ate, and passed out for sleep so deep that i almost didn't make it to the clc french communication mix!

being half asleep combined with the temperature dropping ten degrees in one day (-12 not counting the evil wind) and walking in the shade was very chilly indeed. once inside and "settled", i was cornered by a bunch of strange women asking me questions in french and i cursed my subconscious for adding "sweating profusely" to my discomfort. what a stupid response! :(
once the initial wave had somehow been fought off - my french may be bad and horrifically slow, but it's at least understandable - my system calmed down and i (literally) chilled a bit. after an hour and a half i realized that some of my french is surprisingly decent, some of it shameful. i'll be back at the language center again next week.

i rushed through the freezing cold to get home. the first thing i had to deal with was an email from bell regarding an update to their terms and conditions.

---right after impressing me with their #bellletstalk campaign, they sent out an email with new terms and conditions "as part of [their] ongoing efforts to improve [their] customer experience" to counter the aforementioned show of goodwill:

"To provide the Services, Bell may have to use, reproduce, adapt, transmit, display, publish, perform, distribute and create compilations and derivative works from your content. In accepting the Bell Services, you waive your moral rights, and you authorize Bell to perform these activities in relation to your content anywhere in the world, only to the extent that Bell needed to provide you with Bell Services."

please explain why i should be okay with my internet service provider taking full control of my content? the "only to the extent" seems just a touch ambiguous. i called the number listed on the email as being for inquiries, and after getting through the menu system and being put on hold for ten minutes i was informed that only online chat assistance is qualified to help.

well, shit.

---i went off to the gym, eventually decided to test out my ankle by taking the boxing class. of course this didn't score me any points with the coach... i finally came up with a response to his jibes at the end of the class and i suspect i may have offended him because he got defensive. one of my fellow students made a snide remark to which i responded in a joking fashion, but i now worry that he may not have realized that i was kidding so i'm going to have to apologize to him next time i see him just in case :(

my ankle was hurting but not too badly; after the class i spent an hour or so instructing a girl in our class (army brat) in technique. it intrigued me that while we were working the pads she suddenly shrunk back and said "i'm scared" when i told her how to strike them - i wonder if she was responding to my officer voice?

after training i sat down to my traditional salad dinner and two episodes of downton abbey, then decided to call it a night.

---today:

i slept with french talk radio in the background, and i think that was a good idea. i got up early and was going to buy coffee at the further supermarket before sitting down at starbucks to write these posts, but it was so insanely cold (-23, not counting the wind) that i stopped at the starbucks and decided to worry about the coffee another day. it was so cold that i didn't remove my super-warm sweater the entire time!

i stopped to go to the gym and meet vfmp for boxing instruction: the same thing i'd done with army brat, only he has even more unlearning to do. by the time we left we'd both learned some pretty cool things; i was rather excited because i'd been trying to teaching him what to do with his hips when he throws a hook and suddenly noticed that a cross had been taped on the floor right where we were standing, i figured out that when you throw a hook you're essentially just switching stance but without moving your feet. thank you, taekwondo, thank you :D

vfmp joined me for tea while i ate lunch and we watched total rubbish on youtube (projected on the wall, of course), and i got back to finishing this. horseman's now on his way for some more french immersion, and then i'm going head back to the gym and see how i handle kickboxing. i might not. i'm not planning on doing anything stupid...

---over the course of the past few days, i have finally understood the correct way to eat skittles!
partially crush a few of them until they form a solid mass, then suck. it's stupidly enjoyable and each handful lasts at least five minutes :D

fuzzy yet solid

it's been quite a week so far! my eyesight's been a little fuzzy lately.

---tuesday:

i woke up multiple times during the night, and overall was just feeling uncomfortable. i spent an inordinate amount of time on facebook (and youtube) following the two events of the day: the mandela memorial, and the israeli media taking up arms against gary yourofsky.

1.
a) the behaviour of the crowd was shameful. while the focus on mandela brings zuma's failings into sharp relief, there is a time and a place for everything and the memorial was neither of those.
b) obama's speech was amazing.
c) the sign-language interpreter debacle: it takes either immense cajones or unfathomable stupidity to do something like that. wow.
my sister informs me that "wackhead" interviewed him. i'd love to hear how that went!

2.
gary yourofsky is a complete nutter, he's an asshole and he's full of shit. it's always bothered me that he's invited to speak in universities and other such institutions. having said that, though, a lot of what he has to say is entirely valid and his comparison of the meat, dairy and poultry industries to the holocaust is sadly quite appropriate and there's no need for him to apologize to the jewish people. the "animal holocaust" is even worse if you think about it, simply because the animals are being bred and it's not just a couple of generations being wiped out as a "once off". the animals are born into suffering and suffer their entire lives. killing animals for food is not wrong, but the suffering most definitely is.
the media's attempts to discredit him are absolutely pathetic, puerile and shameful.

i returned to the repair shop at jarry with my ski jacket to get the zip repaired, was quoted $12 and happily left it with them. i used the mission to determine whether it's faster to switch lines twice or to simply stay on the orange; overall, the latter is more efficient but the former is less crowded. so now i know.

tuesday was a day of laundry, naps, family, and french. then i went to the gym for kickboxing. i was still feeling sore from the weekend, and holding the thai pads for badger meant that my bruised forearm got cracked non-stop for about twenty minutes. however! in spite of that, when it was my turn to throw, our instructor was amazed by how much i've improved after a couple of drill sessions with her and was so enthusiastic he made us all work until our arms failed.

i can't tell you how pleased and proud i am; and a little scared now because i can't slide back :)

at the beginning of the lesson i was talking about my snowboard hurts - there were four of us in the class, one a much older dude. "snowboarding, eh?" he said and pulled his shirt over his shoulder. he has a giant protrusion near his clavicle caused by tearing a ligament in a snowboarding accident many years ago. i took one look at that and decided that a little stiffness didn't really man anything :P

the boxing instructor overheard me talking to badger on our way out the gym... "always excuses, huh? always excuses."
i explained to him that this time it just hurts, that won't stop me from sparring :P

i hurriedly showered and rushed to la panthère verte, but was disappointed to find them closed! so i walked as quickly as i safely could to aux vivres, which was going strong: they even made me the cutest little icepack so i could tend to my bruises while i ate! the service was excellent, the food was delicious, it was all good. horseman joined me, we went from there to the open mic night. on the way we decided that we totally agree on his friend's lyrics... i'm not sure if i'm interested in putting my work on the disc he's working on. and he doesn't appreciate criticism.

the evening was fun and the guinness went down well, but too soon it was last call for the metro time and so we left.

---yesterday:

it was not the best of nights. kinda like the night before. i then started the day trying to convert the list of books i'm trying to sell through pg into a format that could be copy / pasted into facebook. between openoffice and facebook the issues were bad enough, everything took forever and eventually, when i was *almost* done, windows surprise restarted for some upgrades leaving me screaming and cursing helplessly at the screen. even though my recent saves were corrupted when my system finally came back online, i'd already done everything enough times that i got the job sorted out fairly soon afterwards.

of course, nobody seems to be interested now that i've finally put the list up :(

...

i returned to the repair shop on jarry to hear that they hadn't fixed the zip because their repair would likely fail within a few days - i really do appreciate their honesty! i was instructed to try a dry-cleaner, and later my local would give me a reasonable quote so that's done. unfortunately my jacket won't be ready until tuesday, and i kinda need one if i want to hit the slopes...

the speakers on mont royal were playing some seriously creepy sounds. i wondered if they hadn't mixed up the tapes and played carols on halloween or something.

i made up for the previous night's miss by eating lunch at la panthère verte, which wasn't bad but wasn't particularly exciting either. after taking my jacket to the dry cleaner i went to sit in the starbucks for an hour and worked on my comic script. i got some fun stuff done, then headed to the gym.

more and more i'm finding the muay thai classes too heavy on the cardio and too light on the technique. it's good to be in a class that forces me to workout properly, but i kind feel like it's carrying too much weight... for example, we literally just ran around in circles for about twenty five minutes yesterday. ugh.

in both classes, i really tried not to get hit in the head too much. unfortunately, that was an integral part of both of them yesterday; during boxing, one kid was jabbing as hard as he would have if we'd been wearing headgear, and i was so pissed off afterwards that i sat stewing until i was sweating. i want to be good for friday's sparring, dammit! and hitting that hard wasn't the point of the exercise :@

during impact i was being hit pretty hard, and inexplicably relaxed just as my partner landed a liver shot - not cool, brain, not cool at all :(

afterwards i sat stretching my very hurt arm (i'd hit the punching bag hard and at a bad angle) and talking to the guy who'd hit me too hard and the iron-haired women who trains everything (she was chaining muay thai, mma sparring and two boxing classes, that's pretty hardcore). one of the guy's parents is israeli, and after questioning my veganism and my isaraeli experience he blurted: "you're very interesting!"

okay, then. i said.

the woman is a mystery to me: i can't tell how old she is (apparently she's my age, but that's from somebody else) and while she's cute and i think she likes me but i'm not sure if i'm interested...

when the pain in my arm got so bad that i was worried i might faint, i packed up and went home. i had a hot bath and hit the supermarket, then found myself staring at my hands while making dinner when i realized that i was almost enjoying myself. that doesn't happen ever. i ate slowly, but enjoyed it a lot more than usual (when i can't eat after training). after dinner i went to bed.

...

redbull's the art of flight documentary is nice until the avalanche sequence, from that point on it's just sensory overload. i can't tell if liked it.

---today:

i woke up with a sore throat, which feels fine now, after a decent night's sleep. except for the dream i woke up from, which involved my father forcing me to participate in some horrible occult ritual. i don't know if i thwarted his plans on purpose or by incompetence.

...

linguistic revelation of the day: "aktuali" in hebrew comes from french or german, not english!

not the same thing at all, now i have to strike that word off my list of "israeli-isms" that bother me.

...

i ran into the crazy-flexible girl from the gym on the metro and we talked until i had to get off. she has a really interesting history as the child of a brazilian diplomat, and her career plan was so wise that it took me by surprise to hear it coming from one so young. i'm well impressed :)

cafe depot was out of coffee again, this is ridiculous. i managed to make the alternative last longer this time, though, so that's good - the conversation was good, ended too quickly, and i had chinese for lunch before returning home to do laundry, rest and post. now? now some relaxation and more french before training.

a week to reflect - ii

[... continued]

pg called last week and it was really nice speaking to her. she's decided she's done with england and resigned herself to being israeli... oh, well.

---dating:

i've been keeping an eye on the dating sites; i've so far seen a couple of profiles that were worth trying to communicate with. most of the girls online are either totally unattractive physically or entirely uninteresting.

last week at ju-jitsu i was paired up with a sexy, large girl with a great attitude and who's so naturally flexible that she's practically impossible to submit. i was almost too attracted to her to focus on the task at hand, with jiu-jitsu things get pretty intimate...

a really cute girl "claimed" me in boxing friday night, and i'm kicking myself for have missed two perfectly good opportunities to ask her out. dammit!

---training:

hayfever makes for difficult training.

our boxing instructor made me feel like shit last week, but this week he made it clear that the grief he was giving me was actually his way of saying i've established myself. when i realized that my enthusiasm returned even stronger than before. so much so that i've been happily working through my jump rope issues: my new rope needs to be whipped down on every stroke and it's an insanely tough workout. by the time we've warmed up my arms are already strained and then i add actual boxing... i'm already feeling a lot tougher after just a few days of that!

one of the guys was sweating profusely the other night and our instructor was giving him shit for it. i couldn't resist:
"oh my god, that's disgusting! i've never seen anyone sweat so much!"
as soon as everyone realized what i was referring to we all had a good laugh :)

i was surprised to learn that the beginner mats' jiu-jitsu instructor's jewish - i heard him talking about the birthright program with another guy and felt like i was in the twilight zone.

i'm gonna miss boxing with scrapper. there's a noticeable difference working with a friend who you know you can push and who knows can push you. one embarrassing incident, though - he was talking to the substitute instructor and i thought he was done. i made as if to strike him and then realized that all eyes were still on him...

...

friday night a couple of the guys invited me to spar with them after the class. the primary objective was for me to learn to defend myself. i didn't really get that far, but it was a bloody good start. i gotta say that it's terrifying to see or almost-see a punch coming for you and it's really hard for me to keep my eyes open and feet grounded. every moment is breathless anticipation of being tagged, and with these guys tags are pretty jarring.

even more upsetting was taking an opportunity to beat up on one of them and realizing too late that i'd thrown all my technique out the window and didn't have my hands up. shit!

...

i began today with an awesome sparring session; it was my first time in the octagon and while we started with boxing we ended up with muay thai.

i do not have what it takes to stare down a spinning backfist.
i do not have what it takes to stare down a spinning backfist.
i do not have what it takes to stare down a spinning backfist.

---last thursday (august 22^nd):

it appears that the metro braking system isn't automated. i witnessed a train stopping too late, and all the people waiting to get out got to watch us for a minute before continuing on to the next station. what a bummer!

...

how 'bout that? all it took to make a shitty day great was an early happy hour, great jiu-jitsu and killer kickboxing, and a stupidly delicious chinese meal out.

---friday:

waking up: muscles relaxed, brain relaxed, window fan whirring, the perfect combination to make me want to just lie in bed and slip in and out of consciousness. but alarms. and crunch time. and reality.

i left very late on friday night, picked up scrapper and took him for indian on the way to vfmp's with thunderstone. the meal was delicious, and thunderstone was brilliant. we played until 3 or 4am with vfmp and his buddies, great beer and games, fun attitude and non-stop funny commentary.

the pre-dawn air was wonderful! it was a little chilly, though, and i was ready to crash. on our way home the taxi driver tried to gas us (he closed the windows before letting rip with a most offensive fart) and drove so fast we were sure he was suicidal.

---saturday:

scrapper and i went to see kickass ii, which was especially cool because we'd seen the first one together. we both enjoyed it immensely, although it wasn't quite as wonderful as the first one. i was surprised by how great jim carrey was and it makes him even more of an asshole for hating on the film.

we went to sports experts so scrapper could pick up some things and i saw a lumogreen hoodie from under armor that was so brilliant i wasn't sure i could pull it off. it would take some mulling over later before i decided that i had to have it.

godmother told me that things were happening on monkland and we decided to check it out, very fortunately running into newk'd. we enjoyed the little street festival, then went to maz for a night of booze, awesome pool and air hockey, breaking to have dinner at shaika across the road (nice place!) and to catch the tail end of a pretty good hip hop performance.

newk'd's girlfriend was defeated in pool by a psychotic dude who took himself way to seriously, and they asked me to please avenge them. getting the rules sorted out was a negotiation, and at one point he became certain that newk'd had talked shit about him and i needed to calm him down. i kicked his ass in spite of large quantities of alcohol and my focus difficulties, and walked out feeling like a hero.

...

i'm not at liberty to share who scored the quote of the day:
"my ex-girlfriend, who was black - i mean she's still black but she was my girlfriend..."

---sunday:

waking up late and hitting starbucks to Get Shit Done without disturbing scrapper or being distracted by him. we did some major shopping at loblaws where i managed to piss him off (my reaction to his not hearing me wasn't particularly considerate), and we proceeded to saint laurent which was supposed to be like monkland the day before but it kind of sucked. i picked up dodgy indian food as we entered and i regretted it almost immediately - the experience of it, not after-effects. to make up for that we went to aux vivres which was awesome.

we walked through la fontaine, sitting down to chat for a while, and i was surprised to see it actually filled with water :P
on our way to piknic electronik scrapper had an epiphany relating to a philosophical point we've been discussing for years now, and he took that with to the party. piknic wasn't great, something about the crowd was a bit weird, but dj bliss was bloody amazing and we enjoyed that.

we got home late, watched devilman: the birth and then passed out. the movie was entertaining, but it's totally weird that the biggest action sequence was boring.

i went to bed feeling the purest exhaustion i've felt in a long time.

---monday:

morning: "beauty snooze" - i was very lucky to wake up on time without my alarm...

after training: it was great training and weather that made me feel good. the indian place was closed so we did chinese, i burned my mouth and was pretty upset with myself because it would have tasted even better otherwise.

we spent the evening discussing biological technological applications and capped it with a reading from ryan north - to be or not to be. it's genius!

---tuesday:
epic dreams of revolution. wearing wednesday socks threw my sense of what day it was out of whack.

there was a dinner fail, we didn't find anything to watch on netflix and closed the day playing a card game scrapper'd picked up that was pretty good.

---wednesday:

a sense over the whole night that i wasn't quite sleeping, just waiting. i woke up hurting badly and exhausted, and dragged myself to the office to meet with moonlighter and then escape. the meetings took longer than expected, but i returned home and napped for about forty five minutes and that made a world of difference.

even so, i attacked the code that i was supposed to be manipulating and after hours of struggling still couldn't figure out if i should write it from scratch or just keep trying. i was most unhappy.

boxing: sweaty yet relaxed, practicing defense. i need a lot more of that.

we just made it in time for a big and delicious indian dinner, then went downtown for an uninspiring beer before returning home. i was properly tired and even fell asleep on the metro...

---thursday:

scrapper's alarm failed so it's good i was planning on seeing him to the airport. i'd discovered a taxi iphone app and organizing the ride there was nice and easy. we had coffee, said goodbye and i went straight to the office.

three coffees and i was still feeling weak. i left late and was feeling wasted, i was on my way to kickboxing and i simply couldn't understand why i was still going... i must be seriously addicted. most of the lesson was disappointing, but some of it was useful and we had a good finish so we i left it was with a sense that it had been worth it. my evening disappeared in the internets and i went to bed relatively early.

---friday:

i woke up feeling pretty good.

happy hour: excellent lunch money game! i'd bought it based on a vague memory, the kinds of things that came out were a lot of fun.

there's something magical about walking in the rain all the way to get food at subway and finding it closed. i learned about twerking and hurriedly finished my application to mars one.

i watched the second episode of black mirror on scrapper's recommendation and was blown away by it.

---saturday:

i began the day realizing that nobody cares about my laundry problems. and i'm not the only one with them. and the dryer doesn't work again.

i posted the previous entry, took a slow meandre downtown with a decent cup of coffee, and bought the luminous green hoodie i'd seen with scrapper the week before. apparently retail therapy doesn't work if you don't like shopping. i'm glad i got what i needed, but that's as far as it goes...

i ate a crappy tofu meal, and between the ride downtown and back played plenty of penny arcade: gamers versus evil. i love that game.

vfmp and his boyfriend came over for thunderstone and lunch money, i made a quick salad dinner and we headed to the village to watch the ufc fights live at a sports bar. it was a pretty awesome night.


---today:

i'm now hurriedly finishing this before heading to godmother's for dinner. i woke up early for sparring, and walked out of the gym into the most beautiful, hot summery day of blue skies and pleasant breezes. i had a quick subway lunch and am proud of myself for not getting involved in the ridiculously uninformed bible debate between two women sitting near me, then took my snowboard to poubelle du ski for renewal.

in retrospect, i should have bought the board but it was too late by the time i realized it. in the meanwhile, i'll enjoy another year of any damage being their problem. i got groovy new boots - bright orange with "nitro" written across them. so my new boots tell me "memento mori". how appropriate...

ushering in a new one

the slowdown in posting was due to meta-posting and my taking advantage of the new year's break to do absolutely not much.

---on saturday night i failed to register for online access to my canadian bank account, and on sunday i called them up, answered all the security questions and discovered that i couldn't register because i'd already been registered. sad that i didn't remember that.

i figured out how to pay the electric bill, and pg and i hit the plateau. it was cold, but everything was breathtakingly beautiful. we found aux vivres easily, but there was such a long queue that we decided to try la casa del popolo instead. sure, they have vegan dishes, but while i was satisfied with my meal, pg and i agreed that the food wasn't amazing.

i wasn't feeling great, and shopping for snowboarding gear for pg was a bit of a bummer. we arrived home much later than intended, meaning that we arrived at my aunt's much later than intended, but there was at least time for a cup of coffee before going out to my aunt's friend's place for dinner.

notes on winter dress:
1. pg wearing my new balaclava - totally ninja. and it really works well with the rest of her outfit
2. my penny arcade hoodie is so warm and comfortable when combined with yang's old coat - it's like walking around wrapped in a duvet ^_^

dinner: lavish. the house is magnificent and everyone was friendly and interesting.

it was a cold, long walk to the metro, though...

---monday:

my stomache wasn't happy on monday :(

pg and i went down to the game store and purchased carcassonne. we would've bought penny arcade: the game - gamers vs evil but they were sold old. on tuesday i'd buy the ios version, it's definitely worth the price. although it probably looks far better on an ipad.

---i don't have a problem with google maps in terms of getting me to a predefined location on the map. i do have a problem with those predefined locations being completely wrong. we travelled into the sticks to end up at the right address, but not at what was labelled on the pin.

---so google maps kinda ruined our plans for the day, and i'm not certain that entering loblaws on new year's eve was a particularly good idea: it was crazy in there.

we wanted to see a movie but we needed to do laundry, and our timing would have been fine if both dryers weren't still running by the time our washing was done. we hurriedly turned the apartment fixtures into an improvised line, i had a quick chat with my aunt* and then we headed downtown.

* you know, it's rare but sometimes my mouth says things and my brain goes "whoa!" - not that i don't love my aunt, but for me saying "love you" at the end of a conversation is reserved for pg and my mother. the awkward sensation as i hung up was only compounded by pg asking if i'd been speaking to my mum, and then laughing at the look on my face.

it was snowing on new year's eve, and downtown was magical. there weren't many places to eat before the movie, so we picked subway (which worked out). pg was playing fashion police, when a group of girls walked out the bathroom and one of them was dressed awfully her jaw literally dropped as she stared in horror.
"maybe she doesn't own a mirror?" i offered, judiciously.
"sweetie," she said, "i don't own a mirror and i don't leave home like that."

skyfall is a fantastic bond movie, it's clever and meta and a whole lot of fun.

the new year didn't start on an entirely good note, though, because google maps and i had a miscommunication and we had trouble finding the metro. dashing through the snow trying not to miss the last metro isn't fun :(

the metro was packed japanese-style. it was madness down there.

---tuesday:

we sorted out our metro passes early in the morning, and then discovered that the entire province was shut down for the holiday so we scrapped our plans and spent the day resting, playing carcassonne and watching one piece.

it was wonderful.

---today:

we got up early enough and took the bus to rockland mall. it was a very cold day. sports experts had nothing of interest, and so we continued on to mec. their jacket selection was confusing in the extreme, but the helpful sales assistant convinced pg to take the same helmet i did and i picked up transformer-style fingerless gloves / mittens which are warmer than what i was using even if not completely warm as such, and pg got her own balaclava.

then we had lunch at rockland, disagreed about the new les miserables movie which neither of us has seen (i suspect i'll be seeing it alone), then waited for ages for the bus home. we did some supermarket shopping on the way, and now that i've paid the rent, we've both bathed (improvised plug) and i've posted this, we're going to do absolutely nothing important for the rest of the evening.

note to self: pg doesn't dig dubstep.

this has been a wonderful few days.