destabilized

 i did go to bed, but i barely got much sleep. certainly nothing restful. mr smear stayed in our bed until morning, and then we all got up early ("in solidarity" according to gd), although i ended up lying down for an additional hour afterwards.

the day started off alright, though. i sat down with mr smear and my coffee and introduced him to mad magazine - issue #295, back to the future part ii - and it was really cool. i had to explain a whole lot of stuff to him, which led to some interesting moments. i think i blew his mind describing the difference by how we all dealt with the CFC / ozone hole crisis as a species, but allowed the oil and animal agriculture industries to divide us all on global warming.

i don't know how much "work" i got done today, certainly nothing significant. in addition to my brain feeling wrecked, gd was on a cleaning spree and discovered (what then became unavoidable) a sewer smell coming from the office bathroom next to my desk which we have no explanation for.

between meetings, mr smear and i walked to the hardware store to pick up draino, and did some tea shopping on the way back home. we sat down for a "salad pita" lunch while out, which was nice, and explored a local toy store's lego selection realizing that we never got mr smear a birthday present.

it's been a year. or two, or three.

i just got off a long call with horseman, most of it discussion the terrifying state of AI-fueled propaganda and the last fifty years building up to the west collapsing in on itself because its people have all been brainwashed to love their enemies more than themselves.

now to drag mr smear away from spore and get some exercise.

why climate change matters

"I have been to many talks at UCT about this topic and every time the same thing happens, they leave out any natural impacts from the sea, clouds, decaying forests, volcanoes, insects, animals and only tend to blame humans. Their conclusions are always the same, end fossil fuel and the world will be a better place, yet they do not give any alternatives. They go on about how the polar ice caps are melting and have never been this defrosted ever, yet if you watch what is happening in Siberia and the Yamal peninsula gas pockets are being formed from decaying animals which were caught in these ice shelves. Now if the ice levels have never been this low in history, then how did animals get trapped in them? I do research in alternative fuels and even with all the billions of funding, the highest percentage it could enter is around 10-15%...so a country still needs something else to take up the slack and every country ends up taking fossil fuel. In fact the trend for coal use globally is on the increase and there is no evidence in sight to show any decrease soon. Even if we were to stop fossil fuel use, the CO2 being produced by nature will still so called negatively impact the world, just at slower rate...but destroy the world in eventuality...or so they say. These climatologists cannot even predict an earthquake, yet they can for sure predict the end of the world, without real tangible evidence. Mars is more evidence of this, Mars according to geologists once had a favourable environment for humans, yet without 1 human or without fossil fuel it destroyed itself! Look at Saturn, astronomers are noticing that its rings are disappearing....without humans and without fossil fuel...all by natural progression. Imagine if this climate change could do a 180 and then we all sit together to find real solutions, maybe there are ways of making fossil fuel cleaner or safer? Imagine putting the billions that go to alternative energy and do not produce significant progress to projects within the fossil fuel industry which were sidelined due to funding problems. While we all flow towards alternative energy...all we have got is higher energy prices, higher vehicle prices, higher transport costs. Have you noticed while civilian fuel prices go up and up, jet fuel has been going down down down and yet the cost of flying is still going up and up. Let us look at Al Gore, his carbon foot print is so huge, you would not expect him to be the climate change activist of climate change activists....then you also have China who cares less. If everyone does not have the buy in then you will fail. I read yesterday that the Chinese built a waste to energy plant in Ethiopia....a little more investigation found that the plant started being built in Sept 2014 and using an obsolete emission standard which expired in July 2014 I think. Yet there was an updated version from 2010...which begs the question why did they not use the more stringent emission standard and went for an obsolete version instead? It is a rhetorical question, had they built the factory according to the new standard it probably would have been illegal to build it. In conclusion, I do not say that I do not believe that the climate is changing, however I do believe that this issue is not as serious as politicians make it out to be, because the world has been in this situation before and managed to have spectacular ice ages and survived thousands of years after them...There was an expedition to the Arctic to study the levels of ice there, the scientists employed the strongest icebreaker in the world, they predicted the voyage would get to their destination in record time because the ice was very thin....in the end, the ice was so thick, the research had to be abandoned...How about that egg in the face and this research had got funding on the grandest scale. There are too many holes in the climate change topic and even the professors who come talk admit it....I feel socialism and communism would make matters so much worse."

it's absolutely correct to say that the climate changes and has changed without us. that doesn't mean that industrialized humans haven't enormously influenced the rate of change, and we have more evidence than we need to demonstrate that. it's easy to pinpoint fossil fuel as a large contributor, but there are problems with that which you've pointed out; however, looking at the prices of things doesn't mean much because a lot more than fuel costs need to be factored in.
getting off fossil fuel is nice in theory, but solar, wind and biofuel are not really viable alternatives as you've pointed out. hydro, geothermal and nuclear, on the other hand, are more than capable of doing the job, and the tiny risks associated with nuclear are absolutely worth the efficiency of energy output we'd get.

it's also not true that getting off fossil fuel alone will be sufficient, as we have as much if not more influence coming from animal agriculture, and all of that combined with a whole lot of other things which include an horrific quantity of food waste being stored in garbage dumps, ocean acidification and depletion, and a reliance on unrecyclable rare metals for our tech parts.

it's also true that we've had worse climates in history, but there's a fundamental difference causing the concern for the current trend: we weren't around when those animals were trapped way back when, and as adaptable as we are humans beings are not capable of adapting to the coming changes "en masse". a heck of a lot of us will die. mostly in wars over resources like water - which if you recall is what began all the trouble in syria.

the planet will survive whatever comes, and it'll most likely re-equalize at some point in the future. human beings? unless we slow this down dramatically or get off the planet, we're toast. we might survive in pockets of mad-max-like hunter-gatherer tribalism, but all the wonderful things that make us so amazing? we'll lose them, and as far as we know we're the most advanced species this universe has produced.

even if all this was some political conspiracy - which is so outside of the realm of the possibility that it's almost funny - not aiming for sustainability is simply not intelligent behaviour. a big part of evolution is optimization, and since industrial consumerism took hold a century ago we've been devolving into a species of wastefulness, ignorance and isolation.

i don't know what socialism and communism have to do with anything, i'm an anarcho-capitalist and i'm pretty confident that my political ideology has little to do with how i'll fare during civil war and surviving in the wilderness. i'm also fairly sure that all the wonderful tech and knowledge we've been developing ever since we started farming is worth saving. i also don't think there're enough politicians anywhere who have enough of a handle on the situation to turn us around without a fight.

this whole "debate" misses one important thing. we live on a tiny planet, it's the only one we can survive on (until we manage to escape), and there's a fundamental principle that most of us learn early on goes something along the lines of "don't poop on your own step"... or more accurately, "in your own drinking water". we are long overdue in applying this principle to how we treat our environment, none of us are immune from the shit-storm that's coming.

rewriting history

it's been bothering me for a little while that there're a lot of posts i haven't redacted that are still linked to by my pages - so if you've ever read my post entitled "summary: the vegan hypocrisy", i've just updated it because i was very, very wrong.

building on decolonization

Cape Town is suffering from an extreme example of a syndrome that's plaguing the entire world, a syndrome that is caused by infrastructure that is geared towards supporting populations in the mid-20th century and that is woefully inadequate and inappropriate given current demands, let alone near and distant future demands. These infrastructure deficiencies - and inefficiencies - directly contribute to the extreme inequality of opportunity that plagues our nation, and while apartheid policies did have a role in determining which races are more disadvantaged the underlying mechanisms in play today are no different that in any other country where populations living in urban centres have more access to opportunity than those in the periphery. A reduction in relative poverty will also go a long way towards reducing the frightening levels of crime we face.

This is an outline of steps we need to take as a society if we're to uplift communities and move towards a reduction of poverty and general improvement of living conditions for all.

First, it must be noted that most of our economic issues can be attributed to government interference with the free market. All of our governments are plagued with selfishness, greed, ignorance and corruption, what we need is to wean ourselves off technologically as fast as possible. That's obviously easier said than done, but there are some things in the interim that our governments can do to ease burdens on both sides of the equation. The first thing is to let us solve our own problems without fining us, as we've seen in the Western Cape where we've been penalized for reducing our water use and for private solar power installations.

Second, we desperately need to let go of our ideas of “heritage"; if we're going to talk about decolonizing things, we should start with this. We don't need cities that look the way our parents remember them as much as we need cities that service its citizens. We simply do not have the resources available for people to live in houses in the middle of densely populated areas, urban areas must expand vertically and the wealthier citizens who can afford the construction and the commute costs can build their mansions in the peripheries.

Gentrification is not actually a problem, but a lack of affordable housing is. The less high-density construction we allow the less options lower income brackets will have, and we're forcing lower earners out of city centres and into expensive cars and commutes. That's an enormous unofficial tax in addition to everything else.

Any new construction in urban centres should have a minimum legal density, and as much communal gardening space must be provided as is practical, in particular rooftops and around the circumference of each level. Urban farming is an extremely important concept that must be encouraged as much as possible. It's also recommended that every large apartment complex have its own safe play areas for families; we used to play in the streets and know our neighbours, which was important for fostering healthy communities.

Low cost housing in urban centres is as counter-productive as any other kind of affirmative action, instead of equalizing populations it simply repositions inequalities along different axes. You might help a few families with low-cost housing, but at the cost of pushing higher-income families out and it doesn't make the slightest difference to the rest of the low-income families. If you're not making a positive difference for the majority of people, there's a good chance your solution is actually a part of the problem.

Government housing should be as dense as possible, and should be positioned as close to the city as possible. In Cape Town, we are very lucky to have two problems that can be solved together - that of available land close to urban centres, and that of exposed and unprotected train tracks. If we were to construct tunnels over the tracks and build large residential and commercial complexes over and around those tunnels we could not only have a defensible underground* transport network, but we could significantly reduce the load on that network by bringing people closer to their employment opportunities and infrastructure.

Third, we must embrace the remote work revolution. There are many sectors that can and should make a remote work option available, and companies should receive economic incentives to do so. There should also be incentives for companies to make products and services available online. This is not just to reduce traffic, fossil fuel waste and expenses all-round, but will go a long way to levelling the playing field for all income groups.

Finally, we need to completely rethink education. Most of our population lacks resources and facilities to learn and up-skill, and that makes it nigh-impossible to improve their station in life. Poor people don't need charity, they need to be empowered. Even if they could afford the time and money to learn, they wouldn't be empowered by sitting in classrooms learning theory; we need mentorship programs, available in their areas because people with no money or earning potential can't be expected to travel. Companies should be incentivized to send missions, mobile offices, into the poorer areas, to provide on-the-job training in practical skills. We need to subsidize mobile coverage for areas that telecommunications don't find lucrative, with free data available for educational websites and applications.

In conclusion, we, the people, need to effect change and create real solutions to real problems, without waiting on our government bodies to do it for us. We all deserve better, rich or poor, black or white, this is our country - and we're all in this together.

---
* artificially underground, of course.

trains, planes and psychopaths

there's a stigma attached to mental illness which i find utterly bizarre. in my opinion, if you're feeling relaxed and at peace tied up with hostages riding in the back of a rickety, crowded van driving waaaaay too fast on a winding road through an empty desert that's liable to either flip or explode at any moment while everyone's yelling "slow down!" at the driver who's wearing noise-cancelling headphones and occasionally taking his hand off the wheel to point to signs on the glass behind him saying "KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON" and "BEWARE TERRORISTS", then you're the one who's absolutely nuts.

it's all the depressed and anxious and crazy people who have, consciously or unconsciously, taken stock of the situation and realized that something's not right but they don't quite know what to do about it.

i know most of you - some of you being the people closest to me on this planet - think i'm just full of it, and i get it, i get the desire to just dismiss unpleasantness as ramblings and get back to the day to day. what the hell are any of us going to change, anyway?

but acknowledging that there's an oncoming train really is the only way to get off the tracks. human history is one long story of evolution and revolution. there's hope on the dark side. there's always hope.

linkage! and fat rants.

apple's losing it.

robert downey jr.'s winning it.

guitar solo faces explained.

earl sinclair IS notorious b.i.g.!

tanyer's rules for jiu-jitsu are spot on

america's making strides in the war on the war on drugs! they're now starting to get the message on a federal level. well done!

speaking of backwards things, rick scott is an asshole.

ooh - a tattoo pain chart.

---okay, so i think abby howard's AWESOME. but she did this comic on body image recently that upset me. why did it upset me? because being healthily large is NOT a problem, but being obese IS. it's unhealthy, and it puts a load on our health services and increases our resource requirements when we're already beyond capacity. it's not offensive unless you're sharing space on crowded public transport which isn't designed for obesity, like in economy class on planes; if somebody doesn't like the look, well, that's their problem and they can keep it to themselves.

but my real frustration stems from the fact that she's apparently into science, and she talks about how she's tried eating healthy. really? like, whose idea of healthy? was it a fad diet, like low carbs or paleo? or the "i'm not eating dessert" diet? because if she'd actually bothered to do a little research, she might have come across the huge body of literature that shows convincing evidence that the only "healthy" diet is a whole-food, plant-based one. if you're eating the western-consumer diet, where "healthy" means eggs and bacon for breakfast, red meat and chicken salads and lots and lots of dairy... well, that's not healthy.

show me a picture of an obese person on a whole-foods, plant-based diet. not vegan, because not eating animal products does not equate to eating healthy. whole-foods, plant-based. you wouldn't be able to keep your weight up if you tried.

out of the way

before i begin squishing my week into this tiny space, i'm going to dump a few things that have been on my mind. in no particular order.

---twilio is amazing. i've been given a good introduction by one of my co-workers and it's something that someone like me could really use!

open-source mobile windmills? we could use a couple of these. the timing's good too: climate change has become disturbingly apparent.

support for non-immigrant lone soldiers. i think i need to get in touch with these people and become a node in the network.

discovery's dishonesty during shark week is sensationally disappointing.

sierra games are making a comeback!!!

when it comes to medicine, this is why reasonably evidence-based should be a thing.

essentially, ibm is working on synthesizing a human brain. with incredibly cool results ^_^

edward snowden *is* a champion of american values.

google smart lenses. say no more.

smoothies and swimming pools

yesterday:

i woke up from dreaming of hanging out with serious fighters in an abandoned warzone, they began harmonizing and were seriously impressed by my singing voice.

i didn't feel like sleeping late; rather i was compelled to arrange things before heading out to bring over more stuff. the screen door gave us some shit, apparently we hadn't put it back correctly :/
we tried watching gintama over breakfast and coffee but gd wasn't up for subtitles. i decided to go, i was taking a large piece of her couch across and we had a fight about whether or not i would take a taxi... which she won. the taxi ride felt like it took forever.

my ps3 *was* there, as were some insects who'd moved in to the trash can and a whole lot of dirt under the carpet i was rolling up which indicates that maybe uncle hate isn't entirely wrong about the cleaning lady's work ethic. i took old meds to the pharmacy for disposal, stopped at the subway for a delicious avocado sub, then returned to fill my luggage with clothing and winter gear and return home.

of course, i packed it really well and forgot to close it, so as soon as i tried to drag it out it opened up and everything tumbled out. lovely.

obviously the first thing to do when i returned was set up the playstation. gd's tv has two hdmi inputs... but only one of them works, so we had to choose between apple tv and ps3. that wasn't too complicated a choice, fortunately. i switched out her superheated amplifier and speakers for my sound bar, which is great from an eco/bill-conscious point of view and the quality's better, but the damned thing doesn't remember volume settings so every time you turn it on you have to press the + button repeatedly until the max light flashes :(

a good friend of gd's arrived and drove us to the apartment for another mission, this time focusing on the carpet and couch cover. i don't think i mentioned the weekend's weather: it was HOT and HUMID. moving under these conditions was trying and damp.

---after her friend left we watched forks over knives. have you seen it? you should see it. seriously, you're doing yourself a disservice if you don't.

i'm not saying you have to agree with it, i'm just saying that every single person on this planet needs to be exposed to it. all arguments (after watching it) welcome.

---i played a little tekken, we went heavy* shopping. after that i went alone to my apartment for some hot, sweaty-night-hating packing and struggling over priorities... and then just missing the metro with ice cream in hand and no spoon.

* my arms were already hurting after the previous day's labour.

it was late and i was tired, i showered, had a frozen meal, finished the ice cream and fell into bed.

---today:

i woke up from a long dream in which i didn't participate in an improv / karaoke event in a large concert hall, then found myself spending a night with buddies in jerusalem and was forced to resolve a hostage situation, frustrating the guy who tried to kill a whole bunch of us with our cellphones and obtaining the evidence we needed to put him away.

getting up was rather rough.

gd and i had enough time to finish packing the last of the important stuff and cleaning up before the woman arrived to inspect. she didn't need to inspect, she decided after a short while, but was absolutely stunned at the state of my apartment. she was shocked that it was so clean and that it hadn't been repainted. i'm always shocked by how people damage their apartments, because fucking things up takes effort.

an hour and a half after getting there we were outside with boxes and bags waiting for a taxi. we dropped everything off, relaxed for a bit with an awesome smoothy that i could make now that i've found the stupid tap attachment, watched yes man which is a surprisingly entertaining movie and then went to the municipal swimming pool.

i like that pool, and i love the fact that we live right next door ^_^

i'm currently playing housewife while gd trains (i'll go tomorrow and hope that the gym's not closed for canada day), then we're off to the movies.

*breathes deeply*
*sweats a little*

2:22 - 3:33

it's the middle of the night, and i'm not in the mood to sleep. my legs are healing painfully post-kickboxing and my brain's online. gd's asked me not to close the door because, like me, she likes to sleep when there're things going on in the background, which i find deeply soothing.

---i've just found a track that i've been looking for for ages - mankey - double trouble. there were a bunch of other vinyls i had but i'm struggling to remember the exact names...

---here's a petition to stop using "neonics", and a simple search for "bees neonics" turns up an article explaining why we should rethink banning them.

what a bummer that the first link can be used to sign the petition, but i can't find a way to use it to argue with the petition.

---we're in trouble. the west antarctic ice sheet is definitely melting and there's nothing we can do to stop it. seems like that link about world under water i posted the other day is even more relevant now :(

---the luna clothing cleaner seems like a very good idea.

---trying to find the right place to spend a $5 gift certificate from comixology is rather difficult.

sunday morning linkage

things that have been interesting me and loading up over the last (short) while:

1. 3D printing pen
2. 3D printing makeup
3. new york city's payphone wireless
4. the fcc are being assholes about net neutrality. someone's had a great idea...
5. jerry said don't do it. of course i did it. and he's totally, *totally* right.
6. here's a good look at the problems of nutritional info online. as always, i recommend going with nutritionfacts.org.
7. used to be some hardcore sexism. feminism's still necessary, but *wow* we've come a long way.
8. world under water? i have a feeling that only the choir's going to check that out, preacher.
9. a building recycling robot? YES.

what if randall munroe?

missing shakespeare's birthday

well, it was will's birthday on tuesday. i didn't totally miss it because ryan north sent out a reminder; i guess i didn't totally not celebrate either as nocence sent me an enthusiastic update that included another potential illustrator. we'll be meeting shortly, i hope.

---the weather has been fantastic! perhaps i did exaggerate a little by leaving home wearing nothing over my shirt. i was still tired, i had too many priorities and distractions and the first of all of them was a decidedly brainless task that would take me most of the day to complete. and then i finished the day with a really bad stuff-up: i asked newk'd to do something that made him feel important, and then realized that i didn't have the authority to give him the assignment. that was a serious bummer.

mma: i made the group uneven so i joined a girl and the guy who thought i was welsh. turns out he's a software developer who'd rather be doing graphic design. hah! and it also turns out that having a girl catch you with a triangle choke isn't sexy at all.
the sexy kickboxing girl from the advanced class? there were *three* of them. all at least as tall as me, bigger than me in a muscular way and very good looking. i need to get myself into that class :P

and back to reality: i started the kickboxing class on a full tank of gas, and by gas i mean literal gas and by tank i mean belly. it was a very uncomfortable class indeed.

it turns out i'm not the only vegan in the class, and the two of us argued about allan savory: i thought i have a good idea and he doesn't. that's a disappointing read...

i was broken after training and i went to bed really late because i was searching for a clinic i could go to. and i went out to the bank to draw cash, once again discovering that it's nearly the end of the month (in banking terms) and i might have trouble drawing enough for the rent...

---wednesday:

an hour earlier is an hour tougher to wake up. i got most of the pre-clean tidy done, and walked out into an awesomely warm and shiny breezy day to be outside. montreal's finest was on display, which almost made up for such silly hours that would have been better spent in bed.

anyhow, i'd picked a good clinic and i only had to wait an hour or two to see a doctor! who was pleasant and pleasantly efficient. i walked out of there in five minutes with a prescription and an eased mind.

i was intrigued by the number of religious jews in the area around the clinic, and horrified to see one couple doing the israeli thing of pulling into a bus stop and sitting while a bus was trying to pick people up.
*sigh*

i mentioned david farland - nightingale recently: i'm more than halfway through, and it's great fun! even if it does go a little over-the-top sometimes, i have a thing about timing and some of the events are just a teensy bit too convenient. but it's mostly a very cool halfway point between a regular high school story and harry potter, only with actual references to harry potter.

i visited the pharmacy on my way home, ate lunch while watching an episode of how i met your mother, and went to the office to be absolutely exhausted while rolling my eyes over last-minute testing and many menial chores that simply refuse to take care of themselves. two coffees weren't enough. the spruce beer was atrocious and the aftertaste lasted longer than could be considered fair play.

i arrived home around 8pm, too late to even consider going to boxing, and parked myself in front of the wall (telly?) to finally catch up with how i met your mother.

i did think to send the cleaning lady a message to thank her, but then forgot on my way to the couch and felt bad for making her send me a message first. it was really nice to walk into a clean, fresh-smelling apartment! i was worried she'd expect to come in once a week, which would be expensive and unnecessary, but i think it's cool to keep it twice a month and she seems okay with the idea. that's a relief.

right - it's almost midnight, and neither lying on the couch nor posting is the same as sleeping :$

the backswing

a couple of weeks ago i mentioned being wow'ed by allan savory's ted talk about reversing desertification.

now, i've waxed lyrical on the topic of political veganism and i've shared my displeasure with the community's methods quite vocally, but here, look, we have a way to achieve their goals while simultaneously continuing to provide for the meat-eaters amongst us:

all we need to do is ban industrial farming techniques, and force the farmers to follow the planned grazing methodology with their combined herds.

this would achieve a number of goals. first and foremost, it would reclaim land that all these farmers would continue to use, so there's a massive incentive for them right there. second, animals out to pasture are already in a much happier and healthier position than they are at present, and we could use this as a springboard to push for greater animal rights. third, as healthy as the vegan lifestyle may be, most people do not want to give up eating meat and, quite frankly, the more of them the better.

say what???

that's right, the meat and dairy industries are pretty much our only hope of resuscitating the planet. so instead of antagonizing them, let's go win-win and play nice: if they succeed with planned grazing, we win, the farmers win, and the animals win.

---i watched vegucated, and it reinforced my belief that people can be made to care enough to actually get this done. it's just an idea, but we can all share it, and make it ours, and turn it into reality. we can do better, without much sacrifice, and here's a way.

evaluation

lying in bed this morning, i found myself morbid and miserable. i think it's the first time i've really had an opportunity to think about pg's leaving without distraction, and for some time all rationalization went out the window and i just felt really awful about it.

i'm still not feeling great physically - i'm pretty sure that i'm not entirely healthy but i'm not sure that i'm actually sick as such. my head's definitely not in the right place, i've been feeling stupid and demotivated for a while, and i think i do need to just wallow a little. am i repeating myself? i don't care.

so... i have a list of things i really need and want to do, and zero inclination to do any of it. this is a problem. i eventually pulled myself out of bed, read a long and painful article about gilad shalit, read a very good response to holocaust denial, figured out what's missing from my 2010 travel posts, practiced a bit of french...

---what an absolutely stunning revelation! i'm filled with hope, wonder, and general awe. allan savory's ted talk is a must-see, he explains a breakthrough discovery about climate change that's counter-intuitive and inspiring.

i'm rethinking my veganism / supplementarianism since last night: it's such a mission in these parts. it might be healthier, but it makes life complicated. and, well, if what this world needs is more cattle and sheep...

mail clear

while pg's been feeling unwell (with me in charge, i think it works better the other way around), i've spent the evening going through emails that have been piling up. then i was stopped by a really cool short story about a buffalito that was recommended by howard taylor, and i'm now a third of the way through and really loving it.

and here's some news that's not new but no less interesting for that: bolivia legally protecting nature's rights. i never heard of that before. good for them!

funny, funny. ha, ha.

i'm currently a little high on shakespeare - after i (more or less) finished my paper on humour, i took a break to watch cool it, an amazing documentary on what we should really be focusing on in order to combat climate change, then grabbed a cup of coffee with nystire before going to the final workshop meeting for the summer.

1. humour: i am now convinced that the benign-violation theory is only partially correct, and that what it describes is not humour but rather the specific case in which humour is combined with the violation that requires the resolution that humour provides. either i'm awesome for discovering that humour is a puzzle with mythological properties, or i'm an idiot. i'll find out soon, i guess. the paper's crap, but it's good enough to hand in and rewrite if necessary; that's just like all my papers at the moment.

2. the creative writing workshop: we acted out the completed script that one of the girls wrote, and it's a solid two-hour stage production at least. i think it could use a bit more polish, but the experience was quite enjoyable - i played two characters, one that i liked and one that i really didn't, and had fun with both.

3. i was going to pick up dinner on the way home, but i had no cash for the dudes who don't take credit cards... so i walked to the atm - but the cash machine was out of order. i walked back to etnachta, and by that stage was soaked in sweat. it's not nice to walk into a respectable establishment with giant obvious patches all over :(

4. after eating, i didn't know where to begin with my final paper. and then i realized that the phoenix and the turtle is a summary of the sonnets, and from there began analysing a lover's complaint. finally! it's a tight fit with my thesis and has just been incorporated. so now that i have something interesting to say, i guess i'm just gonna say it.

all i have to do is complete this by the weekend.

being human

point 1:

on sunday morning, i walked out of the apartment on my way to the bus stop and was surprised to find anti-1 outside, apparently saying goodbye to someone. she walked most of the way to the stop with me, and i tried to talk to her but she was noticeably troubled. at first i thought she was embarrassed about me seeing her with the guy she'd said goodbye to, then she got really weird and i just couldn't figure her out. the only response i could make out from her mumbling was "not good" to my question on how things have been...
i was on my way to work, and pg was sleeping, so i didn't invite her up to my apartment... i told her i'd be back the next morning (because we were going straight to a wedding), and to give me a call. i felt bad when i continued walking to the bus stop, wondering as i passed etnachta if i shouldn't have invited her for coffee, but she'd already pulled a "no, no, it's alright" so i sent her an sms.

i didn't think about it much until sunday evening, when her brother called me to inform me that she's been psychologically unstable and had fled jerusalem on friday night, her phone having been disconnected, and the guy i'd seen her with had been told that she was going to hang out with me. which i hadn't known about.

this troubles me a lot. not in the least because she's an intelligent and, from what i know of her, successful girl. i can't stop speculating on what could possibly cause someone who "gets" this world from going over the edge. what could it be? generic life complexities? lack of fulfilment? family issues?

i really hope she's alright.

---
point 2:

on sunday evening, after a long and exhausting day at work, i arrived home to a wonderful surprise - pg had made a tray of meringues for me. this totally set the tone, and we left for the wedding in great spirits. i'd prepped the map (and was surprised to learn that my iphone's map is location aware, i thought i'd have to do something to enable that) and scribbled a backup and i pretty much knew where we were going.

what a bummer that, at the very last moment, pg noticed that i was taking the right highway (road 1) instead of the left (road 20) - i was certain it was the other way around and i hadn't even bothered to check the signs.

traffic was a bit nuts at that hour, and i immediately pulled over to the left lane... but i was so focused on integrating with the left highway that i didn't realize that i wasn't just going over the painted island, but that the physical curb-height island was right in front of me. i didn't see it until it was too late, and to much grinding and car-simulation bumping about i committed and went over it.

there's nothing worse than being forced to accept that i'm just a regular human, capable of remarkable idiocy. after the initial and immediate shock, the reality of what had happened, i looked in the rear-view mirror to see that the guy behind me had simply stopped. in the middle of the highway. i would have done the same thing. i wouldn't want to get close to someone driving that badly either.

so my ego was more bruised and battered than pg's mother's car - with it's ultra-low suspension - at least the car made it most of the way and i parked it neatly in the parking lot of a gas station so that we could inspect the damage, only to discover that it wouldn't start any more.

and the fact that it's due to be sold within the week... my timing couldn't be better.

after work last night i was going to go visit pg's mother and tell her that i will obviously be taking all costs upon myself, but was fortunate to run into her walking her dog on my way from the bus stop and so was spared some of the awkwardness. there was no argument over who was going to pay, and on the plus side the towing was covered by insurance and i've just been informed that there's no actual damage aside from undercarriage scratching... *breathes out deeply*

if that drops the price of the car, i've offered to pay in the difference. either way, i keep reliving that moment, mounting the island - it's painful and horrible :(

---
sunday:

one of ze germans gave me a ride to work after spotting me waiting for the bus, and there was a supremely awkward moment when he asked me what i was doing, i gave him the usual schpiel, and he said "okay, but can you not give me a general direction? what field is it?"
what harm could it have done? i told him.
"ah, you're working with mmf, huh?"

shit. so much for discretion. mmf was shocked when he heard, but once the cat's out of the bag...

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sunday was technical fail day. things just weren't working, and i spent a lot of it frustrated. or feeling silly. and i was tired.

---
facebook surprised me by reactivating my online status in the chat, and i discovered that when a guy i went to school with began a conversation with me. i didn't mind talking to him - i quite respect him - but i was working and i didn't have too much time to concentrate. he asked where i was, and i told him. "oh! you're with so-and-so." i didn't say anything, i'd heard that the so-and-so was somewhere in israel but i don't even know where - i certainly haven't seen him anywhere. "yeah, he just gave me some money," he continued, and i found that strange and thought i'd just let it go. i asked instead how he's doing, and his response stumped me:
"poverty."

alrighty then. i'm only just starting to get my life sorted out (and still in a bit of debt, even if my bank numbers are finally in black again), i haven't seen this dude in years, and i automatically felt like i want to help and the whole thing just made me feel awful, and not a little guilty for living well.

i expressed my regret at the news, and pounced on a pause to disconnect, set up the new "limit availability to," and tried unsuccessfully to forget the incident. no dice.

---
lunch was argumentative: i need to chill with our secretary, and accept that her attitude is great for an israeli and kak for a westerner, and at least she's nice about it. she caught me on a point that really pisses me off, though. in israel, you can't be interested in more than one thing. so if i'm making the case for recycling: "you're such a saint! you should dedicate your life to recycling" is a more-or-less traditional response.

how am i a saint? like most people who are aware of what's going with our planet, i'm concerned about sustainability. i'm not making any great sacrifices, i'm living my comfortable, polluting, wasteful lifestyle just like everyone else. the difference is that i'm trying, with the little things, to minimize the damage i do in living that lifestyle. one doesn't need to become a monk to do that.

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our orientation proposal has been accepted. next semester, i'm going to be teaching first years how to be happy (happier, at least) students. w00t!

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google+ hangouts: i pulled a trick i learned from chatroulette, joining a hangout with a bunch of friends and holding up an offensive message to my webcam. i logged off as soon as i got a funny response; i must admit that's even funnier when it's people you know. also in the google+ news: circles as opposed to friends means that you can follow anyone's public posts, twitter-style. without obligating the followed to be a follower. not bad, google. not bad. now we just need circles within circles and we'll be mostly happy.

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it's hard to argue new tariffs with the bus driver on a packed bus with people pushing and shoving from the curb during rush hour. i thought he was confused by the new setup, as a lot of them are. i discovered later he was right, though, and not only that but that it was to my benefit: glilot is covered by the "red" zone tickets, which means that my "cheap" student card takes me all the way to cinema city... and here i thought it ended in ramat aviv :P

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yesterday:

i had to wake up twice, and *just* missing the bus meant an hour of transport hassles. perhaps it was to pay me back for getting a ride on sunday. i was a bit stuck in my thoughts of the day before, mostly about being disappointingly human but also about accepting the craziness around me.

i also levelled up on self-awareness.

mmf's first question when i walked in: "how do you spell personnel?"
"S-L-A-V-E," i offered.
my boss chimed in without missing a beat: "B-O-T-S." it took mmf a few more tries before we stopped offering alternatives and helped him out :P

we had a pleasant lunch, for a change. i managed to keep a lid on my emotions, even responding calmly when our secretary stated that what i didn't know was that there are scientists who don't think that global warming is a real problem. jesus, we're backwards here.

---
on seeing a religious family of half a dozen children, all i could think of was:
seriously, guys, i think we've been able to check the "be fruitful and multiply" box for a while now... either chill with the procreating, or have a properly violent world war, or get off this rock. this shit just isn't sustainable.

---
norman finklestein was amazing. the chat afterwards was fun, too :)

back to work: i learned that XMLConfiguration doesn't like being used in a logical fashion - at least i got it to work eventually, even if it was arse-backwards.

dinner: the frozen fish were impossible to separate, and we didn't want to defrost all of them. after much struggling we headed out to goocha, and had a great meal. i was *tired* afterwards, and wanted to go to bed, but *OH NO MARINGUES AND BEN & JERRY'S!* and then i passed out.

i woke up this morning with an unhappy stomache [i wonder why?] and ripped another disc before heading out to the bus. i was on time for it, too. i finished the second chapter of heart of darkness, napped a bit, and then rocked up here...

the first item on my priorities list took about ten minutes to secure. that makes me happy. now for the rest of them.

summary: the vegan hypocrisy

NOTE: (december 2018): i have since learned a lot more about both nutrition and the environmental effects, and had plenty more opportunity to review the ethical ramifications of the previous two components. i was wrong. very wrong.

veganism has already had a significant impact, even though vegans are still a tiny minority, and the evidence is now pretty clear that we all need to reduce our consumption of animal products or get off of them entirely if we're to avoid the oncoming train of global heating. a whole-food plant-based diet is the optimal diet for the vast majority human beings, it's the only sustainable diet, and it's the only ethical diet.
to make a change, you can start small. find a veggie dish that you really like, and make a point of including it in your regular diet. then find another. the good food will begin to push out the bad. better is better than no change at all.

PETA is still awful, though. i don't take that shit back at all.

[NOTE: i have since learned a lot about nutrition and a lot of what i wrote here is incorrect. about the nutritional aspects, not the political ones. i'm still unimpressed by political vegans. see nutritionfacts.org 

when you turn vegan, you don't magically correct the way that the animals are treated. i promise. if you care about them, then go for the source and stop lying to yourself that your passivity is making a difference.

is killing wrong? go on, deny your humanity. our existence, specifically the quantity of us on the planet, is what's taking more lives than you can imagine. you're no bloody hero because you started yourself on a diet that at best might cause you to suffer malnutrition. eat a steak, then go do something useful like running a farm that treats its animals right.

or start wiping out humans. you probably want to.

vegan is not a dietary choice - it's a highly politicized world-view

the problem with veganism is that it's rubbish. people do it because it's popular and it makes them feel good about themselves, and superior. being a vegan does NOT make farmers treat their animals better, it is NOT a healthy lifestyle and it IS an aggressive political force that spells big trouble if we continue to ignore the issues.

veganism is essentially a form of homeopathy: the less you do the more effect you have...
people will believe anything that makes their lives easier (or that they *think* makes their lives easier).

there is irony in being against milk extraction when it's necessary for the survival of the cows. is there really such a thing as a total vegan?

some proponents are willing to tell the truth.
here are some interesting points to ponder
in particular, there is much controversy surrounding B12 sources.

did you know that a lack of b12 not only means a lack of energy, but also depression? and can lead to psychosis? most vocal proponents of veganism are crazy enough, thank you very much. this link here is from a "how to be a vegan" website.


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the following is neutral, useful information on b12 for the whole family:

on b12 absorption

deficiency symptoms and fun facts

b12: the numbers


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fear mongering: heart-disease, diabetes and cancer.

diabetes is not caused by eating meat. there are precisely three contributing factors to developing diabetes: being overweight, not exercising, and aging. if any statistical correlation can be shown then it indicates nothing more than a spurious relation. you see, when you learn how statistics work then others cannot leverage them against you.

cancer? everything causes cancer. there has never been a scientifically run study that shows that meat causes cancer. there has, however, been a rigorous and intriguing study showing that living on a diet consisting of meat, its fat, and NOTHING ELSE has surprisingly excellent health benefits.

we're no longer herbivores, so this makes sense.


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health benefits of humanely raised red meat

the inuit paradox - high fat, lower heart disease and cancer rates

meat CAN be bad for you, but remember: not all red meat is processed meat!

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while we're on the topic: ever heard of PETA? animal rights? did you know that their founding intention is to DESTROY all domesticated animals, because they consider them to be unnatural?

catching (almost) six

i was good today, didn't nap at all. i remembered to take my outfit to "work", too, for dress-up day.

we had to get off the shuttle at the last tel aviv stop, which meant coming in from the other end of the base. i was still feeling a bit hung over, and *had* to do the salt and vinegar chips thing. the owners love me, and excitedly promised that they would be ready in five... they chirped and chirped while the oil bubbled, and about half an hour later the rain began pelting down and i sat down with my fresh chips and bowl of vinegar. i wasn't going anywhere.

at least the rain didn't last very long, although it was incredibly heavy. nobody would really have cared if i'd been late, anyway.

i made a pretty psychedelic background for my workstation, with "RELEASE ME" boldly pasted over it in a random yet funky font. after coffee and a little bit of time with the guitar, i got my work environment mostly set up and then changed into my outfit. everyone loved my spy disguise, and the fake 'tache i wore suits me; i don't think i could grow such a strong one, though. i reminded myself of the stranger.

i didn't speak to the discipline officer because i was dressed amusingly. our SC was terrified that i'd go out of my way to make him feel bad because i was proven 100% right in my assertion yesterday. i told him that if i'm not to file that complaint, then i can at least make sure he knows he has to inform his brethren in the Cabal of the Unrefined that they have to stop that shit.

an exchange of snow stories with one of the guys who just got back from a week at les arcs (where we were last year), and i'm aggravated that it doesn't look like i'll be able to go this year, all because of the weird situation with the army.

suck.

as my mom said, i'll have to make up for it either during the summer (argentina) or pull a serious stint during next year's academic vacation.

lunch was quick, and the whole "carnival" thing was less atrocious than last year's. they had tekken - i don't know which post-tag one it was, and i was beaten twice by some average kid with a shitty attitude... i'm so used to certain basic moves that i was completely thrown when they didn't work.

oh, well.

i spent the afternoon getting back into the swing of working on my project (at least something productive's possible), playing secretary and whining about the fact that the entire unit now has access to whatever munchies are on my desk; that, and whenever someone comes into the office i hear a buzz and a bang right behind me and my nerves are going to be shot if i don't get used to it quickly.

from the base we went to one of our section-mates' new apartment - a cool, refurbished hospital room in sisters' quarters. there was blood pooling in the corridor. while there and drinking (i forgot i was in uniform :P), we watched youtube videos, laughed about ordering pizza online (the user experience is excellent), and talked quite a bit. i left when the guys put a movie on, to catch a bus back home so that i could get some sleep.

if i hadn't been so wrapped up in the news, i would've been in bed ages ago.

an interesting story: prohibition poisoning

octopus using tools: i dunno, it doesn't seem to different from the hermit crab. thanks, nystire :)

a brief glance at the x prize plans

i'm meta-linking to the gore op-ed that says we can't wish climate change away