i have a new dwarf

this would've been a wretchedly depressed post, but rachel ruined it. today was just as difficult as the last few - my thoughts and responses are ultra-slow and i've been moody*. on my way home, i got to pondering the fact that i'm constantly holding on to both my "perfect citizen" character and my "bad boy" character. i don't see any problem with my "bad boy" being a hero, but the "perfect citizen" schtick is irritating me. i was taught to think for myself and act on those thoughts, and i'm incapable of doing so until i lose the uniform.

analysis vs. experience: i'm not sure how much soul-making i've been doing, because in analysing everything i've been forgetting to let it all in. i don't really get emotional anymore - aside from frustration, and intermittent bursts of joy - and that's inexcusable. by me, at any rate :P

in order to make up for feeling bad about blowing off the musician i mentioned yesterday, i took what might be a step in the wrong direction and invited songbird out for a drink. i'm a little concerned that that might be unwise, but i'm going to do it anyway. we used to be good friends, and i hope we can be again.

* i feel like i've just fallen prey to a facebook quiz:
You show symptoms of sleep apnea, a potentially serious sleep disorder. People with sleep apnea quit breathing repeatedly, often hundreds of times during their nights sleep.

You show symptoms of insomnia, which is defined as a persistent inability to fall asleep or stay asleep.

You show symptoms of narcolepsy, a life-long disorder characterized by uncontrollable sleep attacks during normal waking hours.

i think i'll be fine with a holiday, particularly if i knew i was done with my current job :P

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sleeping on the shuttle with rain pounding down violently on roads with no drainage (and so providing a constant sensation of diving) was nice. i woke up an hour earlier, but got to sign in for an extra hour (i'll be abusing that soon), and i didn't need to hang around unprotected and wondering when my ride would show up.

also, the shuttle driver's ringtone is the original version of the hamster dance song.

i got called in this morning to be told that i've been misreporting hours. i was at a loss, because i feel that the whole concept of reporting hours is a pile of crud. i just explained that it was a misunderstanding (it was), and i now know what not to report under :P

speaking of our SC's greatness: he's managed to get nystire riled - i'm no longer the only one shaking his fist at the sky because of his mismanagement.

i jotted down the words "external confusion", and i don't remember why :/

i put up a sign a week or two ago, apparently quoting braithwaite (a re-quote from hillman, i can't verify it): "the price of the employment of models is eternal vigilance". i looked at it this morning, and for a moment confused models for the fashion kind... the quote still holds.

i spent the day designing and coding my secondary project, and although the work is sort of slow (i'm being extremely methodical), i've made a number of improvements that even surprised me. my favourite moment of the workday was solving the problem of a function with too many arguments - one can convey a whole lot of information very simply, if one picks the correct metaphor and works at the right level of abstraction :D

the little bit of work i did for my TL caused quite a ruckus, because i refuse to do a job half-heartedly. i had enough information to provide an answer to what was asked of me, but i couldn't ignore a path of enquiry that had been hinted at by someone in the chain. to his credit, he did eventually come around, and even picked up on something i'd missed :)

there's nothing worse than ejaculating a statement intended humorously, only to realize almost immediately its gross inappropriateness. we were coming around a wet corner and someone mentioned that only our bodies' weight was keeping us from floating off the road, and i wouldn't have made the comment if i hadn't been amused by the ridiculousness of claiming that idiot-girl's body had the only weight that counted, she's smaller than any of us and quite thin. once i said it, though, i realized that no girl can ignore a chirp like that, and i spent the rest of the ride feeling like a bully :(

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i braved the pouring rain in order to sell out my most faithful and supportive friend of the last three years: i have traded in my ipod. he will be sorely missed.

i have dubbed my new nano ukko, and i hope he'll accompany me with the same usefulness and entertainment as the dwarf to whom he is namesake did sláine. he's green, but not as ugly ;)

it's now past 22.30, and i've done precious little this evening. maybe that's not such a bad thing.

i read bunny all the time, but it's not every day that it does something for me

novel writing month? cute.

what the hell? poster-flies?! genius!

how do i do it? how do i go through so many years without ever having watched the rumble in the jungle: the fight?? at least i've seen it now, and enjoyed it - that was intense, and i'm no fan of boxing.

inbreeding

i was soooo right last night. work was good, and then spot and i headed off to the lizard. not many people came, maybe 4 / 5, but it was fun nonetheless.

well, it was fun until that last sambuca. i dun got me drunk. i don't like being drunk.

crasher gave us a ride home, and when i woke up i was still a tad sloshed. i had to have a gorram cold shower, because our geyser wasn't set properly. and a cold shave, too, on a sunday when i usually have a bit of a beard.

on my way out, brother bear called to remind me that i was supposed to supply the main part of the section breakfast... "oh crap" was all i could think of. i rushed past the supermarket, bought massive mangos^*1, apples, two bags of muesli (took a while to find that), honey, and a ton of yoghurt, agitatedly waited in the only queue (only one cashier??), and then hopped a bus.

on the bus was a 27 year old who's just joined the academic corps, so i gave him some pointers and generally felt sorry for him every time i looked at him. hope it all works out better for him than it did for me :$

the bus ride this morning was horrid. when we got to the train station, way too many people pushed, shoved and tore their way into an already full bus, and aside from carrying crushables i had my huge bag on my back, and i was shoved into an unfortunately not-lonely corner which i defended with elbows and knees the whole ride to base.

i don't want to be frotted.

back on base, mush-brained, and i'm extremely glad that daddy-o was at the lizard last night, so he was late too :P

it took a while to get things going, but around 10am we had a feast: the muesli went down superbly well!
*gleeful toothy smiling*
*much dry-washing of hands*
[it's not often that totalwaste gets something like this right, people. be impressed!]

soon after breakfast the hangover settled in, and that lasted a while. we cleaned our offices (which for me meant a lot of time popping balloons; my ears still hurt a bit from before i perfected my technique).

the afternoon was a relatively quiet on the work front. i spent an inordinate amount of time playing around with a productivity tool that we've always hated until now (now that i know what's going on it's simply brilliant. not perfect, but brilliant), quite a lot of time lecturing piles, a fair amount of time finalizing (19 days to go!), and a bit of time just hanging around.

i discovered that songbird broke up with her boyfriend last week; now while she's not exactly my type physically, and she doesn't meet my age / area requirements, i still find her absolutely adorable and i've had the thought of dating her sliding around my mind for most of the day. i can't quite catch the thought on either side, but it's definitely there.

it's okay to date a soon-to-be ex-coworker, right?

the driver of the bus to work was a total asshole. i hate drivers who don't understand the words "smooth" or "elderly passengers". the idiot was accelerating like crazy only to brake like crazy, and that's something i just don't get. i must be unenlightened.

work's been great tonight. another job almost complete (there seems to be a trend here). our boss caught us on our way out, so we've been here an extra half an hour - i'm calling it a lesson learned (as in, not sitting outside waiting for the damn bus).

g'nite!

^*1no, really. MASSIVE. like, everyone thought i was trying to put one over them with fake fruit. these were only slightly (like maybe a centimeter or two) shorter in length than a rugby ball^*2.

^*2but really, really tasty.

animator vs animation iimore flash than you can stick a shake at

bill gates for president? got my vote.

haim harari - a view from the eye of the storm: sad but true - long, but highly recommended.

friday on base

i walked to the balcony, met up with the mongoose and his girlfriend, and we had a fun evening. aside from discovering that *both* the bartenders have boyfriends, and being seriously undecided about the appearance of a girl who appeared to be making eyes at me (it was dark. i'm not taking any chances). they gave me a ride back to ramat gan, the most irrelevant place in the country, around 3am, and i went straight to sleep.

i woke up in time to go have lunch on base. that's kinda sad. songbird's guarding, so i spent lots of the day keeping her company. erm - abusing her company, i really need help with the book i'm reading :$
oh, and playing some gta2.

i did laundry, and then put the laundry in the tumbledryer. lordy lord, i feels RICH o_O

i had dinner on base as well, and around midnight took a taxi most of the way to the zamir. i only discovered this morning that the israeli equivalent of minibus taxis operate around the clock on the weekend... bummer. but whatever, i arrived on time for a friggin' AWESOME, AWESOME party.

i was completely broken by 5am, having had too much to drink and having jumped up and down the entire night... i think the bartender likes me. i asked him for a coke, and i got a complementary shooter :B (i can't control the urge to double-tongue!)

wr and i joined ta2 and one of the door managers went for breakfast. when i got my coffee, and then wr got his chocachino with cream - the waitress took note of my expression (didn't say a word! or, at least not to her...), and came back a minute later with a bowl of cream for me.

1...

2...

3...

aaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

i've mentioned ta2 driving around with cat food. we're getting in the car, when he spots a stray cat. out comes the cat food, five little piles, and then suddenly 6 cats appear out from a hole in the wall. extremely cute :)

wr and i got dropped off at azrieli, then walked a bit before taking the minibus taxi. i got home around 8am, had a shower, and slept until 7pm. i woke up to 3 / 4 episodes of friends, and am shocked at how long it's been since i vegged in front of the telly. and how quickly i found my groove ;)

my host made some meaty / noodly goodness, which made a good breakfast, and now that i've done the dishes - until i couldn't take the kitty litter smell anymore, at least - i'm off to the lizard.

training day

last night i called kc's father to wish him for his birthday. i've finally been invited to join them for the jewish new year :P

i made it *just* in time for the bus this morning. halfway there i managed to catch a seat, so i got to read a bit instead of simply standing like an idiot as usual.

the kid and i got quite a bit of work done, and we managed to throw some important data in the little one's direction. i'm calling him mini-me [edit:piles]. because i have to :D

we went out for a big lunch, to an extremely expensive place in songbird's area. travelling was great, because we all dozed off, and it's kinda far away. the food was great, and there was plenty, so we didn't suffer too terribly.

i can't believe i didn't catch it yesterday: there's been a huge screw-up (something special for each and every one of us seconded soldiers), and the idiots from our original base misunderstood the procedures, and they're treating our base as a physical part of theirs. retards.
i've made sure that if there're any repercussions, they're going down for them.

i went by our branch commander to get a signature for something, and she called me in for a chat. a long chat. an extremely positive and exciting chat that, coupled with the arrival of piles, actually put me in a state of shock. it is unbelievable the difference that it makes having commanders who really care about and look out for their soldiers. and who use their brains. i cannot express in words just how much i appreciate them.

that camp's bay girl (cbg) i met on the phone? she called today, invited me out for coffee on the weekend. very cool.

i've begun giving piles obscure tasks to perform. little missions and things to keep him on his toes and let us see what he's capable of ;)

the bus to work was eerily empty. i got to read some more, quite comfortably. i was just in time for a sandwich, and some good coffee (the cute girl has learned).

yet another replacement: the boss has asked me to begin training one of our dealers to be my second. in one sense it makes me uncomfortable, but if he does have designs to "release" me, at least i have backup for a short while. i hope not, though. i really do like working here.

how not to name your company? TOTALLY.
why do dogs...?