bigger miracles

 it's the middle of the night, and i'm sitting at my computer nursing a cup of tea and a skinned and bruised knee. also a lot of emotions.

1. getting mr smear out of bed this morning was difficult. it was just as difficult to get him to sleep last night - the direct result of the mgmt - kids video - and gd and i were frustrated because we were trying to watch the boys. mistakenly thinking he was asleep, about ten minutes into an episode where (obviously) lots of extremely inappropriate things had been said / yelled, one of the characters said "fuck!" and his voice rang out "I HEARD THAT!"

*facepalm*

[stops writing to grab a piece of cake our elderly neighbor dropped off this afternoon]

anyway, at least i realized that mr smear was legitimately deeply asleep for the first twenty minutes this morning, as i didn't lose patience :P (i have a test, i move his lips and sing and he giggles the moment he actually starts waking up)

2. it was another difficult night, this time i started on the couch and moved through to the bed. i don't know what's what anymore.

[this is surprisingly good cake]

3. it was a rushed morning, but pretty good. i dropped mr smear off at school, helped gd with online groceries, and then hopped on a bus to my mom's bank. my reason for being there was a ridiculous bug that makes it impossible for their international clients to do anything, but the lady i encountered was helpful and everything was sorted out quickly.

4. work was work. some of it interesting, some of it frustrating.

5. i picked up some emergency groceries on the way home, and came back to everyone in good spirits. that lasted until we realized that mr smear hadn't done his homework, and then he refused to do his homework, and then we were doing A Thing.

5a. i'm actually feeling particularly proud of myself for how i handled The Thing. i turned his aggression on its head, which both frustrated him and entertained him simultaneously.

5b. gd lost her temper, and there were lots of feelings over dinner. but we somehow managed, together, to get through to him and by bedtime we were doing well, and he appears to have a newfound appreciation for who we are and what we're trying to achieve. hopefully this sticks a bit.

6. after putting him to bed, i debated whether to go rollerblading, and eventually decided that that was a good idea. i tried a new route to the meeting point, and i think it was easier. which is good, because although we only did 20km tonight (i mean, it's still a lot) the route was predominantly uphills and downhills, and by the time we were done i wasn't sure if i'd make it home without a taxi, and i'm still not sure if i'll be able to sit or stand tomorrow.

my bum hurts.

but more than my bum hurting, my knee hurts. on our first downhill i hit a deep crack in the asphalt that i hadn't anticipated, and i now have a video recording from one of the others of a pretty painful (but extremely lucky) wipeout. i landed face-down, my pads took most of the damage, and i honestly have no idea how my chest and belly are practically unscathed. i have some minor cuts and abrasions on my hands and arms, but the worst scrape is on my left knee, because my pad slid down on impact and exposed it.

fortunately, one of the crew had a spray that calmed the pain down enough that i could continue the route, but after getting home and showering gd put peroxide on it before bandaging it up and that HURT.

so i've now spent the past hour and a half recovering and snacking, and now i'm getting ready to go to bed.

i think it's been a good day.