it's a... oh, nevermind

"what are you doing tonight?"
"i'm dressing up as a zombie and joining a crowd of others on a mission through the middle of the city"
"can i join?"
"sure, but are you sure you want to?"
"of course!"
"great!"

"what are you doing?"
"i'm trying to buy make-up for tonight's zombie walk, but all the costume stores are so crowded that i can't get close"
"don't worry about it, i'll organize it. what colours do you want?"
"green, blue and white for our hair and faces, red and black for random injuries"
"i'm not putting make-up on my face"
"erm - it's a zombie walk. what do you mean, you're not putting on make-up? that's kind of the point. look, are you sure you want to do this? you really don't have to"
"relax - it's fine, i'm coming, we'll discuss make-up later"
<suspicion begins>

"okay, i bought the colours you wanted. green and gold hairspray and black and white paint-stick."
"cool, and i think i have red at home. but what's the gold for?"
"what do you mean, 'what's it for'? we're dressing up!"
"it's a zombie walk. we're dressing up as zombies."
"whatever. it's purim*, nobody cares what you dress up as"
"it's not purim, it's a zombie walk. it's for dressing up as zombies."
"well, i've bought it already, it doesn't matter. you're making me feel weird about this"
"and you're being weird about this. are you sure you want to come?"
"absolutely"
"okay then"

we meet, and spend half an hour alternately having fun with the make-up or fighting with it. i almost end up with *real* arbitrary damage in the process. she refuses to leave the gold alone, but in spite of that we end up looking pretty good.

we take a taxi, and arrive on time. there's quite a crowd, and people have really gone all out. the atmosphere is warm and there's excitement in the air.

"wow - these people are weird!"
(me, smiling) "aren't they just?"

we pause to take photos and get her pepperoni pizza and beers - it's nigh impossible to get her to stop smiling for a good snap.

the walk begins, and we're off to a good start. everyone's in good spirits, there are enough participants to form a believable crowd, and there's feasting and attacking of vehicles and moaning and groaning, and onlookers are having a blast.

"are you planning on keeping the foot-dragging and the groaning up the whole time? it's going to drive me crazy"
"it's a zombie walk. we're zombies, doing what zombies do. what's the problem?"

"don't you think this is all a little childish? i mean, a bunch of people dressed up and attacking cars, crowding around restaurants and generally making asses out of themselves?
what's the average age around here, anyway?"

well, *that* was fun. i couldn't enjoy the rest with her, and i couldn't let her go by herself, and the group was really in the groove. we shared a really unhappy walk home.

"when i said it was a zombie walk, what exactly did you expect?"
"i don't know, but nothing like this"
"nothing like a zombie walk?"
"i guess not. i was just so sure it would be... different"

well, it most certainly didn't go as well as i'd planned. in fact, in my mind the walk back was accompanied by the constant sound of glass tinkling on the sidewalk (a la "how i met your mother"). if i hadn't intervened, it might even have been a real sound - she was so agitated that i had to convince her that breaking her beer bottle wouldn't make her feel better and would endanger any animals in the area.

how have i been deluding myself these past three weeks? how have i been able to ignore all the clues and hints? i'm beginning to understand just how blind love can be.

* purim: "lots" - a festival celebration the last-minute rescue of the persian jews from annihilation. everyone dresses up and drinks a lot to celebrate confusion and the fact that all was not what it seemed.