contemplation

i read comics, watched some battlestar galactica, and passed out on the couch. i woke up a few hours later, pulled myself back into shape, showered and walked.

i eventually caved in and took a taxi, whose driver impressed me no end by taking an honest-to-goodness efficient route. i got to the club at a relatively fair price, and the guest list price brought the cost of the evening to "average". now if only i'd brought "average" sort of money... with taxi, entrance, one beer, one rum and coke, one energy drink and two chocolates i was barely left with bus fare home :P

speaking of which, that energy drink and the chocolates could barely keep me standing - the music was great, but i was feeling so drained that i was almost sleeping standing up. i didn't see anybody i know, but the fact that botchman was planning on going proved a good enough indicator that it would be a decent crowd. last time i went on the spur of the moment, and the people were a bit iffy.

when i wasn't bouncing - and most of the morning the beats were made of solid, floor-rumbling stuff - i was processing the past week. i consider it a combination of prayer and meditation, and i think i have (to a certain extent) made peace with my present situation. also, i spent a lot of time contemplating how much of my experiences i keep to myself and how much i try to share with the world. i see myself as a sort of conduit, a role which i'm not uncomfortable with as a parallel to what i'm busying myself with but which i must be wary of in its ability to overtake my personal priorities.

the walk to the bus home was beautiful, i tried to capture something of it with my camera but i suspect that what's in my memory is all that i'll keep. i'll probably post the snaps anyway, because i'm beginning to appreciate even the crap photos as reminders.

i showered and went straight to bed, sleeping wonderfully and waking really slowly. as i lay waiting for my alarm to harass me into physically getting up, i pondered my (excessive) communication with gn1. i think there're a lot of things that are impossible to know without throwing oneself into a relationship, and i'm curious to see how much of an actual fit there is as opposed to the purely intellectual.
how will our extremely differing opinions and tastes affect each other?

wow. i haven't seen potential for something serious in a long, long time.