inspiration

 yesterday:

the exhibit was very interesting. getting there was a story, i don't know if there was a GPS issue or not but my bus app was playing silly buggers and i ended up making some lucky guesses to get there on time.

on the way i bumped into a combat fitness instructor (identified by her shirt), who was happy to answer questions that i had on behalf of someone online who's trying to get into that role and asked me if i could help. so that was convenient :)

the first part of the exhibit was very, very long. and there were no seats. and as a not-journalist, i found myself both amused and frustrated by the differences in calibre of the people in the group with me. some of the things i saw were new, one piece of footage of an unsuspecting victim driving straight into the firing line of a rocket launcher was unsettling.

not as unsettling as being in the same room as the actual trowel that was used to behead a thai worker, though. the room was filled with weapons, documents and clothing, along with certificates from hamas' kids' training camps, and the more information we were exposed to the deeper and darker the picture it paints.

it was a look into the abyss of the darkest recesses of the human spirit.

eventually we moved to a screening of footage from october 7th, and although i'd braced myself, all i needed to hear was the vague description of what we were about to see and "nope" the fuck on out of there. i understand the journalists having an obligation to bear witness, but i didn't need to see it with my eyes or hear it with my ears.

just the description alone was more than enough to rattle me.

in a completely different vein, the conversations outside on the way out and home were riveting, constructive, and encouraging. i feel less alone, and i'm warmed by the enthusiasm which some of the group who "get" what we're facing embraced my vision.

it was also cool seeing gco again. and i gave a pep talk to a couple of cadets who were on duty as guards.

i was utterly bombed (poor choice of words) by the time i got back home. i passed out for a while, woke up to a small fight with mr smear about his homework - gd did a great job coming to the rescue - and then mr smear, my mom and i went out to dizengoff center and the shuk for what ended up amounting to a nice, but rather hot, walk before dinner.

inscryption, then bed.

today:

i definitely slept better. i worked from home today, and actually got stuff done in spite of my noisy family all around me. mr smear's synth practice this morning was very impressive, and on the whole mr smear was very cool today. including at the climbing wall in the evening, even though he was really unhappy about the heat. it was ridiculously hot today.

otherwise, my mom and i took him to his hebrew tutor and i ran a quick half-hour errand in the heat to the post office depot to pick up what turned out to be nothing but a single sharpie :/

ali express ftw...

anyway.

two amusing things at the wall: i made a deal with mr smear but worded it badly, and he thoroughly enjoyed following my instructions to the letter in precisely the opposite of the spirit in which they were clearly intended. i conceded graciously, we had fun, and he'd already done a lot of good climbing anyway :)

the second was a harley rider driving by taking himself very seriously. mr smear: "i love it when motorcycles sound like farts" 🤣🤣🤣

it's late, and the next few days are full of Business. i'm probably going to go to bed soon.

...

my mom and her best friend were talking today, and a thought suddenly struck me - they're both aware that they need to get out of south africa, and they're both nervous about where to go and how to manage. so why not make aliyah together, be close to their families, and provide each other with a good buffer and support while settling?