hard morning, wedding, long day

well, i had that speech i was dreading. and it went more or less as expected. it was difficult, they found it hard to accept. but it was done.

i'd like to think i did it well. and i don't care if there's a bit of resentment residue.

the rest of the day was uneventful. in the evening, the dog and i took the train to caesaria. the train ride sucked, he was trying to show me how i was being too tough on them... and it was very difficult to express to him just how little i care about his opinions of my leadership.

learned a new word: "sagemet". it the name of the first officers' rank, converted to sound like a disease.

the wedding was stunning. weird dancing in uniform, so we didn't, but we enjoyed it nonetheless. especially the groom's speech, it was something special. and it's interesting that there's really no way to translate it into english, it just wouldn't have been meaningful.

we got a ride back to tel aviv, and i crashed at the dog's grandma's place.

we were supposed to take turns sleeping in the office today, but i never got around to my share. most of the day was just reading and being bored. and, to my delight, the guys have begun behaving, although not perfectly, more like soldiers.

oh, and fighting with the doctor because i haven't received treatment for my slipped disc. i hate our clinic.

i left the base for a bit, then returned around 19.15. i don't know how i managed to climb over the gate, the angles i had my body at were all wrong. the dog and i went to the mall, had supper, and then went back to my place. i showered and got ready to go to work, while explaining to him how to take care of my apartment.

i hope it's all okay.

i got to work on time, but they'd locked up and gone out for an hour, so i had a cigarette with some religious dude, discussed the settlement evacuation, and then crashed on the stairs for an hour. we've just gone on duty. i'm completely buggered.

-- that interesting thing i was hoping for is causing me much stress and anxiety. sometimes, tough decisions need to be made, and taking a path that is completely unknown is more than merely daunting --