meeting halfway

the quote for the day comes from my unit commander:

"you're not going to be happy with it, and the big chief isn't happy with it either. i think this means that it's the right way to go."

i'm tired, wired, and still suffering crazy munchies. i haven't the inclination to go out and i just know that i've had far too much face-in-screen time today.

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here comes the big news: yesterday morning, my unit commander called me in to his office. he'd just heard the news - the process to have me thrown out of the army was stopped.
STOPPED.
allegedly after the big chief was consulted.
the big chief - the man who decided that it wasn't alright for me to be released by my own request, and so forced it had to be an institutional decision...

i was very, very angry. bitter, too. catch 22? precisely.

my anguish carried through and touched everything and everyone around me; yesterday was tough. there were arguments, and there was general disagreeableness. when the army barber screwed up and i had to ask him to shave my head, it wasn't in the politest of tones.

i finally decided that it was time to get the past year's hurt off my chest. i managed to catch the unit commander at an opportune time, and i explained to him what i went through. i told him what it was like being under investigation, how paranoid i became and how unmotivated and frustrated i'd been. i told him how offended i was, and am, that they did that to me; i shared with him my difficulties in coming to work each day in the wake of all of that.

as i told him - it's not that i can't function, it's just that i'm still suffering and it's going to take a while for me to get over all that shit.

i was glad to find him attentive, and also for the support from someone else in the unit after discovering that he'd also had an issue with our suited heroes.

...

today began with me being called into the unit commander's office again. this time it was positive - he'd had an opportunity to talk with the big chief. it appears that the cessation of effort on their part was due to a bureaucratic process (new rules) that would, if successful, only see me out way after my current release date.
it has been agreed that i will once again request an early release, but not an immediate one, and that he will have it pushed through as quickly as he can. the agreed-upon date is just less than half my remaining service away.

so - not great, but better than nothing. assuming it goes through (i don't trust anyone in this system), that would give me a couple of months to sort my shit out and make a bit of cash before i travel at the end of summer. i can see the light, and i'm praying it's not an oncoming train.

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wednesday evening:

i was extremely distracted and antsy, as i've been the entire week. it was a welcome break when the dean's kid arrived, and it did me good to see that he's starting to get it and is almost done with the mundane stuff. i've already given him the go-ahead, and introduced him to schmoozing 101: his teacher's a bit miffed that he's gotten external assistance, so i've told him to run what he's done so far past him and show interest in getting his approval ;)

i have to admit - he drove me demented by eating something crumbly and brushing the bits onto the floor. i can identify with my cousin and his dust-busters of doom; as soon as the kid left i dashed for the dustpan :P

blogging and rome before showering and sleeping: i'm glad i called it quits when i did :P

thursday:

i woke up late this morning, and if i'd had to shave that would've been killer. as it was, i managed to catch the bus that usually flies past me, so there was less high-speed pre-coffee perambulation. i slept the sleep of the dead on the shuttle, and not even the stupidly bumpy entrance to the base could get me to move. i'm surprised i registered when we'd arrived.

i had breakfast with someone i barely know, and the conversation was a bit awkward. he was impressed at my method for teaching the arts of inanimate communication, and we chatted about the (mostly lack of a) relationship between the programming profession and computer science.

a morning meeting was hosted by our section's confectionary artist, who'd made fantastic ice-cream with bits of matza (unleavened bread leftovers from passover).
on wednesday i'd put someone who's getting married soon in touch with a photographer i'm friendly with, and he caught me on my way out brimming with enthusiasm - i've made a really good match, apparently. so much so, that he and his bride have requested my advice on music selection as well :)

after being told by our secretary who i needed to get in touch with regarding the early release forms, it took me one and a half hours to make contact with someone useless and return to the secretary to get her to send a request for me. she could've just done that in the first place :/

lunch sucked. the food was surprisingly tasty, but in my enthusiasm i attempted telling a story. instead of allowing me to talk to the point, one of the guys kept asking questions until he'd thrown me completely off-topic, and managed to misunderstand (a combination of both linguistic and cultural miscommunication) in such a way as to turn the whole event on its head.
no matter what i said, they refused to accept that they hadn't understood me - it's incredible how we find it easier and more desirable to believe the bad, even if the bad is mere fantasy.

also, a fleck of sauce splashed onto my early release form that i was taking to the big chief. uncanny.

i became aware of an odd attitude adjustment i make - when i'm on base, i have absolutely no patience or tolerance for all the sad, miserable civilians who work there; the same people who i usually have all the time in the world for. it comes with the sense of humour failure, i guess.

i was called in for a chat with my SC concerning a fun project i may want to distract myself with until my release... a science-fair sort of thing. i'm wondering what direction i should take.

i got a crapload of work done today. i found the "go to line" command for textbox controls (i'd implemented that manually, not so efficient), finished rewriting the massive mess of spaghetti code that my team-mate had tarnished the application with, and produced one of the most demanded effects - producing pretty pictures automatically.
in my "on fire" mode, i crossed off a bunch of other items from my todo list, and left on a particularly inspired note.

i napped a bit and read a bit of the new wired on the shuttle home, and have been stationed in front of my pc since i got home.

i'm fairly positive that the screwdriver was a bit over-the-top, but an episode of rome as a break from catching up with my reader was fun. the end of the sixth episode is really cute, and the seventh [watched now as a break from posting] is awesome :)

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hybrid - disappear here is absolutely stunning!

this very cool concept car is too stylish for words.

space vampire - a choose your own adventure book that i loved as a kid. i don't know how we got to talking about that the other day.