egg on my face

 well, i guess i've been wrong all this time. apparently, it's possible to put a price on one's personal safety, on one's health and wellbeing, and on being with one's family.

what a fool i've been.

i don't know what to think right now, but i'm gobsmacked and heartbroken. i don't know where to put all these thoughts and feelings, but i do know that i'm feeling sick to my stomache and i'm going to have to reevaluate a lot of things.

at least i managed to get my wife and son out of danger. that's not nothing.

...

in spite of my uneven state of mind, i managed to convince mr smear to face his fears and give the first toodee and topdee boss (without cheats) another go. he did beautifully. not only did he persist until he got it, but he did it in a different way to me; in fact, i would say he did it in a considerably harder way than i did.

then, to make that success even better, we completely demolished the entire next world including the boss and he did most of the work and the puzzle solving. i'm very proud.

...

nystire came through to drop something off, and i'm very grateful for his timing, his warning, and his giving me a lift through to the car after i brought our reservation forward half an hour. getting to my family was crazy - i got blocked and turned around twice - and getting through the protests to the airport required second-guessing waze a couple of times. we arrived at the airport just on time.

mr smear needed the toilet, and i had to wait with him while he took what felt like forever. during which time a number of people used the facilities in a way that made me confident that they were very sick and that there was a good chance we might have picked something up.

and i'm still not over the cough thing. i thought i was getting there, but that's like every day for the past couple of weeks. it's just not going away.

the drive back was okay until we hit tel aviv, and we got stuck and turned around for ages, mostly because there were two closed off roads around the diamond exchange in ramat gan that nobody had marked as such. after our second time around, i marked it and we managed to find a clear route home, and i eventually dropped gd and mr smear off around 11.30pm. then i had to get the car back, and was just becoming despondent as i stopped across from a blocked road that was my only route to the parking when the light turned green and the cops and blocking bus cleared off in time for me to get straight through.

that was a huge relief.

i stewed all the sweaty way home (it's stinking hot outside), and now that i've had some time to cool off (including doing some more grinding in steamworld heist) and shower and write this, i think i should probably be getting to bed.