payday delay and new year's re-evaluation

monday 31st december:

going to bed around 2.30am but only getting there around 4am with mr smear refusing to sleep for an hour and a nightmare half

the great playdate part 2, podcast publishing

swimming with water wings, mr smear going it alone for the first time and once again making the tattoo delay utterly worthwhile

heavy grocery shopping in 2 parts, popping loads of bloons along the way (i'm an addict, and it's become an OCD thing where once or twice a day i bring myself incrementally closer to 100%)

taking mr smear and his bicycle to the company gardens but both of us were exhausted, returning home for dinner, shower, thundercats, and to cry at the end of toy story 3 again (the others don't make me cry, but that ending gets me every time)

bedtime, bloons, road rage videos (i think i need a dashcam), then a less early night than planned

tuesday 1st january:

at least the third day with my neck threatening to spasm (left neck / shoulder)

a better night, waking up to the thundercats, our friend / playdate coming over, taking forever to get going to meet my mom and do some quick picnic shopping*, taking forever to get going to kirstenbosch, eventually arriving, finding a spot, calming down a little before managing the two boys alone in a small stream

* sandal stress on the way out

an important nap, a quick dip in the pool, thundercats followed by dinner and hunter x hunter until bedtime (fantastic teaching opportunity)

bloons until late, going to bed early-ish (11pm)

wednesday 2nd:

a grumpy morning, sitting out some maintenance tasks, still stressing about not being paid, letting in the cleaning lady, napping for twenty minutes, heading to the coffee shop to work and look for freelance jobs, protoplasm joining me and walking home for a beer, some manly venetian blind fixing and an interesting chat about sustainable architecture

gd's first curry (excellent), thundercats, hunter x hunter, an easy shower and bedtime, early to bed ourselves

thursday 3rd:

being woken by the olfactory assault of my wife spaying tabard in a closed bedroom and having to go sleep on the couch

one or two hours of snoozing my alarm, getting a bit of work done over a suspicious avocado toast breakfast, a mr smear meltdown, pinching nerves down to my calves, dropping gd and mr smear off at the castle then heading to work at the gym, an interesting chat with a "recruiter" (not exactly), some difficult hours between working and minor distractions, half an hour on the phone with my bank to (re)discover that their "wire transfer tracking division" can't track wire transfers unless they've cleared already, sending off a passive-aggressive email to our CFO saying that as i'd already borrowed money to pay rent, another couple of days wouldn't make much difference

at least coming up with a vague strategy before leaving around 4pm, taking mr smear down to the pool for a great swim, learning that he can stand by himself in the shallow end (!), gd joining us for a bit, showering, watching coco again, rushing an already sleepy mr smear through tooth brushing and bedtime, bloon destruction, settling in to work and finding the money in my account (hooray!) and sorting out repayments etc.

preparing an intro speech in case my offer to coach high school students in spoken word is accepted

today:

it's just past midnight and i'm going to try to get some work done before going to bed, it's really pathetic how exhausted i've been and i'm distracted and demoralized in general. i watched lisa feldman - you aren't at the mercy of your emotions today and i'm wondering how much control i have over this...