probabilities

aaaargh! it's 2.30pm and the water's been turned off. just after i tidied up my buzz-cut post-shower, so i can't wash off the remaining tiny trimmings. the building notice warned that the water would be off between 9-11am, so what gives?! i'm very lucky that i could shower after the main event, at least.

---am i sick? or am i just depressed? perhaps my feeling lousy has something to do with the fact that i cannot recall when last i spent a morning like this one, simply staying in bed until almost noon. i watched some of the ted talks on space, and then switched to dmt: the spirit molecule when i began passing out again.

it's a fascinating documentary. i'm startled at how well their conclusions fit with my philosophy, and how dangerously close they are to missing the point entirely. without having tried dmt, i have formulated my own theory: taking dmt is like plugging in the access codes to your operating system. your external perceptions are temporarily shut down (including time) and you are treated to a visualization of the world of ideas that plato was referring to, or "god" as i choose to call it: that mechanism of meaning that filters and translates from objective reality into your universe.

those angels and souls awaiting rebirth, that comprehension of one's place in one's own consciousness and one's power to change one's reality, that connection with all things internal which are actually representations of all things external... it all makes sense.

why do i say "dangerous", you might ask? well, the attitude that what one is communicating with is an external intelligence is no less ridiculous than any of the other religions' foundations. some guy gets in touch with himself, by accident or intentionally, and decides that everything he has learned has come from a higher power and must be brought to everyone else? no, i say. one should be free to have that spiritual experience and awakening and not to have others cram their experiences down one's throat. your universe is vast and you should have sovereignty over it.

that's not to say that one shouldn't see oneself as a part of the biosphere - everyone is. and yes, we communicate with it constantly. but the entities that contact you while you're offline are your own representations, your soul or elements thereof. their messages are not to be disregarded, they're very real, but one should appreciate them as such.

but, like, that's just my opinion, man.