circles under my eyes

it's 2am and i've been up for an hour after being restless for about an hour... i've really been struggling to sleep the past few nights. last night was because no matter what i did i was hurting my neck, tonight because i'm now trying to learn how to sleep on my back.

this is hard.

i worked from my mom's on monday morning, installing heaters but remaining cold as the doors, windows and vents still need fixing. gd joined me for lunch, though, which was nice.

yesterday mr smear's teacher sent a panicked message making sure that his fake cheese wasn't nut-based. every time we have an incident like this it makes us really angry, because other kids' allergies are being taken seriously whereas nobody gives a shit if contact with dairy might kill our son. that's fucked up. i told her so when i dropped him off in the morning, but it's not like she's going to be able to change anything.

you can tell how difficult it was for me to get motivated today by the fact that i finally hung the mirror we "inherited". i got sucked into grocery shopping after picking up mr smear, picked up an obligatory cup of coffee from my mom's coffee shop, and after finally working out and documenting the steps to a new process i joined an onboarding call for a couple of hours - at the end i registered that i was caffeined up to the gills and totally wired...

today our little neighbour came over to play with mr smear, and she asked why we don't drink dairy. we gave her the for-kids version - that cow's milk is for calves, and what happens to dairy calves when they're born - and i'm very curious to see if her mom's as okay with us answering questions as she claims :P

*sigh*

i've now refactored some of my side-project code, hopefully it'll all run so i can go to bed with a clear conscience...