sleep and dreams

it's one thing i've had the spongebob squarepants theme song stuck in my head for two days, and i'm now used to sciatica keeping me awake and tossing and turning, but i just got up from a really long, surreal nightmare of being hunted by an infinitely dense army of insects, from my first home to an office block in town where everyone was treated to a vision of table mountain surrounded by a dark storm of densely packed giant fish.

that's now the third night in a row that i've actually slept; i really, really need to be well again.

---wednesday 5th:

getting up at 5.45am for housekeeping and work, crashing just before 7 and having a hard time getting up again

mr smear also struggling to wake up but sharing a great start to the day, dropping him off at school and returning to gd watching alan watts lectures and setting up my desk to be able to sit down

hummus lunch and a bit of the long earth, my third coffee helping as little as the first, the plumbers arriving before i left to pick up mr smear in a serious hurry to return so that gd could leave for her appointment - obviously he pooped as i arrived and once we were finally on our way home the streets were blocked by driving that was clearly the result of a dumbnado

mr smear playing puzzle games while we waited for the plumber to finish, being hit with a ridiculously high fee, trying to gather myself to take mr smear out in unpleasant weather and realizing later that i wasn't just exhausted but was unwell

going to the supermarket for a few items then coming home to a sponge out of water (is that the third time this week? i can keep going), dinner, an easy bedtime and then my own bedtime

thursday 6th:

sleeping almost through, although the lower backache made me toss and turn as usual

late morning, still not feeling great, long prep for a quick meeting with the architect, picking out a dev machine then picking up mr smear, hand-washing tantrum management, mom's storeroom run for a pilates ball, painter introduction, selling a chair back to the second hand furniture store (R100 return on our R500 rip-off), key-cutters, grocery store, home, dinner

mr smear didn't poop in the bath, but he'd pooped before and managed to remove his diaper and get in without letting on :/

there's a thing he does that i love and can't stand simultaneously: when i'm trying to put him down and he doesn't want me to, he throws his legs out to catch mine and makes it impossible to lower him. it's a strong move and my only way out is to spread my legs wide enough that he can't reach, but that's impossible in small spaces like the bathroom.

gd rescuing what could have been a rough bedtime (he wanted juice, he wasn't getting juice), watching a bit of disenchantment but passing out on the couch