the best part of working from the gym’s workspace is that while i don’t have to work out before i sit down, the ease of access makes it easier to work out than not to. over the course of the past couple of weeks i’m noticeably fitter and stronger, even if my sciatica and my upper back have been acting up. i think some of that has to do with what i usually refer to as my body “reconfiguring” itself after a long period without exercise, my back and shoulders may be sore but they’re definitely getting better, and i’m beginning to see a bit of definition rather than being “in shape” that was more round than anything else.
it suddenly occurred to me that a fair amount of my issues might be due to the fact that i trained so hard in my first few years of taekwondo that when i got back to it after a long break i did damage because my body wasn’t ready to change gear as quickly as i expected it to. or the opposite - that once my early training began to have a serious effect i was destined to be in trouble without constant maintenance. i’m kind of hoping it’s the latter, and that with proper maintenance now i might actually be able to reset to some degree.
Wednesday, June 27, 2018
Monday, June 25, 2018
filling hours
one of my favourite books to read to my son is gigantosaurus, which is a retelling of the boy who cried wolf. but the lying dino survives, which i think damages the message so i always leave out the last page while repeating to him how naughty and dangerous lying is.
tonight he forced a page turn before i realized what was happening and saw the gigantosaurus walking away from the bad little dinosaur, and i found myself hurriedly explaining that the gigantosaurus had digested him and pooped him out.
i feel like i'm going to pay for this.
--- sunday 10th:
make that 2.30am... and then getting up half an hour later for a wet bed followed by a tantrum triggered by changing his (wet) hulk shirt for another hulk shirt
5.30am dreaming of stepping in the long earth to organize myself for a canadian burning man
a slow morning but feeling much better than in previous days, taking mr smear to kirstenbosch, wasabi chips and sunglasses, stomping on mole hills, disappearing oranges and bubbles ("hulk smash!"), stalking another new friend and splashing in the pleasantly surprisingly full stream, sailor joining us for lunch, a delicious double-hummus and falafel lunch, mr smear becoming impatient but mostly sweet and learning to be polite, a stroll towards the car and a fall by the river hurting his hands, managing to get him into the car without waking him, the sudafed suddenly wearing off while sailor and i said goodbyes
a quiet drive home, mr smear waking up just after we arrived, a quick chat with my mom
my first attempt to scan an old comic, surprised by a grocery run, dinner and shower and bedtime (mostly smooth), manhunt: unabomber
monday 11th:
some productive time, lots of nostalgia, climbing into bed with a sore throat at 1.40am
4.15am up for mr smear's coughing fit and finding it painful to swallow myself
everyone sleeping in a little, feeling a bit better but still needing a sudafed, gd enjoying teen titans at least as much as mr smear, doing a bit of mobile dev research, breakfast and adventure time before heading out to my therapist
a good session, but failure to update and connect with gd which generated a storm; (mostly) calmly facing the storm and feeling quite good about it - although i now suspect that my relative zen was due to the meds
an apartment chase while i was making a call leaving me giggling and choking when an insurance representative picked up, a pleasant drive to hout bay with mr smear falling asleep *just* before we arrived at our destination, going to their vida instead and learning that we'd dodged a bullet before because their falafel snack pot's dip has dairy in it
a moment on hout bay beach, our visit to the world of birds cut short because mr smear couldn't handle being there without the next day's playdate (serious tantrum)
stopping on the llandudno road to take a whizz and some photos, mr smear having a good time; then stopping at camps bay beach for a fantastic late afternoon stroll in and around the water, both myself and mr smear absolutely loving it in the perfect weather (and gorgeous sunset)
straight home and into the shower, toy story and dinner, a pleasant and quick bedtime, meeting prep and most of the second-to-last episode of manhunt: unabomber, a sudden and violent cranial nerve not-mograine (nausea, dizziness, faintness) that i think went (mostly) away fast because of my self-neck-massage, a good meeting, posting a ton of photos on instagram
tuesday 12th:
a bit of work, finally going to bed just before 2am (with a very sensitive thumb, the latest casualty in the winter dry-skin war)
dream: a fox assassin with a stripe, star and crumpled-up tissue on his forehead who warns his targets by approaching them and saying "ah-TISSUE!"
up early, dropping mr smear off late as usual, getting some work done at my mom's coffee shop, meeting gd at the hospital just in time to sign the documents and find her ward, returning home to pick up mr smear's ready bag and some food for him, dropping by gd quickly then picking up mr smear then returning to the hospital just in time to see her off to surgery, taking mr smear to find lunch and making a bad call - royale eatery has a good reputation, but their vegan offerings just don't taste good. mr smear having a great time playing and eating the side orders and going nuts for their chocolate peanut butter shake (that's brilliant, at least), going back to the hospital expecting gd to be out already and discovering that she hadn't gone in yet - i thank all the gods i don't have a regular job or that would have ruined my day. instead i stopped by the neurologist to leave a message, changed mr smear at their baby station and walked him to watch tennis and walk in the park
"the hard way" (carrying him over my shoulder) with him screaming "i want to walk like a big boy!" was an absolute breakthrough moment for us
a happy but frozen gd, fleeing the air conditioning as soon as we could get her discharge papers signed
heavy traffic home and mr smear passing out, a quick emergency grocery run, waking mr smear getting him to the car, leaving right into rush hour
seeing what most capetonians suffer daily was eye-opening and shocking, waze waiting 10 minutes of gridlock before taking me on various alternate routes, after an hour of discovering new dimensions to the problem and finding my fellow drivers increasingly loathsome i gave up, turned around and was home in less than ten minutes.
both kids crying over the cancelled playdate, coming home and taking mr smear and his bike to the promenade as compensation: he amazed me and made me very proud, riding his plastic motorbike at great speed all the way to the mouille point end of the promenade (i had to jog to keep up), and even though he was tired and somewhat out of breath he understood that he wasn't going to be carried home and either walked or rode most of the way back. i left him with gd, picked up falafel and ran into someone we hadn't heard from in a while, mr smear ate well and enjoyed shower time (i gave him what remained of gd's colourful soap and he took painting the shower doors very seriously), finding and reading a hebrew book i'd lost (the cleaning lady really isn't good with books and comics), mr smear going straight to sleep
completing manhunt: unabomber (excellent), getting into work and random chores
wednesday 13th:
and suddenly it was 2.15 and i was *tired*
a very sore thumb, gd feeling better, a good gym session, a good work session, picking up mr smear, no naps but resting on the couch while he watched boss baby, setting him up with little big planet and cheering him on as he completed the intro level by himself!!!
a family photo struggle, taking mr smear to print it, a visit to the park and bumping into one of his friends - who would not relinquish mr smear's bike and at one point even pushed him off roughly (and there was much drama)
coming home, a quick work meeting preventing me from emergency grocery shopping (i hate running out of tissues at the best of times, but in this case my sinuses were still performing)
a pleasant shower and bedtime, trying to watch defendor and passing out on the couch in spite of the sudafed, at some stage moving to the bed
thursday 14th:
getting up at 1.30am and working through to 4-4.15am, struggling to sleep until mr smear slipped into our bed, which was fine until he fell asleep; at that point i'd been cornered and had to move myself to his bed, having managed to hurt my neck and feeling awful
waking up really tired in a proper lightning storm (that got mr smear excited), gd not able to get in the car, a good run and stretch before work with a bit more shoulder mobility than i'm used to
finding entity framework's code first inability to handle a primary key's type change frustrating
mr smear apparently unimpressed by the substitute teacher, a pleasant ride home (i love him singing along to the chorus of danny gilboa's hayom she'ha'osher yagia)
reading some of leah moore's the complete alice in wonderland graphic novel with mr smear, playing ipad jigsaw puzzles, slash fiction inspiration
aquarium fail, grocery rush, protoplasm visit, emergency shower, quick bedtime, lost in space, couch sleeping (not a good idea)
friday 15th:
mr smear's midnight nightmares, followed by sleeping until morning
<that strange moment when you realize you've actually been sick for a few days and didn't take notes>
starting the day with a shitty feeling
gd joining me for twenty minutes of the school's father's day puppet show, an hour's work at gd's not-hypnotherapist, a visit to the olive branch and picking up a book and adventure time top trumps cards
a very productive meeting with the afrikaburn director
visiting my uncle who'd needed three stitches in his head after falling off his bed the night before (he appears to be on his deathbed) and flailing about helplessly for a few hours before falling asleep and being found by his domestic worker
making it to the temple on time, a pride-filled moment of mr smear singing the chorus of lecha dodi loudly and perfectly and everyone else either in awe or laughing - i giggled uncontrollably
the service running late and rushing to buy a laffa for dinner, everyone tired and crashing early
saturday 16th:
a late morning for all, adventure time
taking gd's phone to the waterfront, being sent to the cape quarter who then sent it to canal walk, picking up a bed roll guard for my uncle (which i would forget to deliver)
an exhausting but pleasurable afternoon playdate to make up for turning back on tuesday, mr smear taking a while to warm up to the girls but eventually playing well, aquarium madness (600 girl guides), ice cream nervousness, kale spinach frozen coconut yoghurt win (he remembered that the green was delicious)
adventure time, dinner and roughhousing
freezing after the shower and starting a headache
mr smear's dragon onesie
finally finishing defendor, really enjoying it
not enjoying a tig nogaro special at all but becoming increasingly certain that i had been cooking a migraine all day
sunday 17th:
sleeping better, waking up feeling much better (still sore and spasmed a bit, but less migraine)
adventure time and a slow start while gd prepped and left for her conversion course final exam, mr smear wearing his dragon onesie to a museum / company gardens playdate, gd meeting us there after her exam, everyone coming to our place for lunch, mr smear coughing into the hummus, taking them home and mr smear passing out on the way back, taking advantage of his nap and getting a much-needed back massage as a father's day gift, watching a bit of brother bear as a family then visiting my uncle upstairs to install the bed roll guard and have a chat about aging, priorities and fixing family karma
showering mr smear and turning an almost-accident into a successful poop in the toilet (hooray!), easy bedtime, ice cream and falling asleep during thor: ragnarok
monday 18th:
a long night dreaming about sleeping correctly, waking up still sore (left shoulder, right sciatica), adventure time:
"oh no, finn is being naughty!"
"no, daddy, finn is FINE!"
leaving late (as usual), mr smear enthusiastically singing along to rob zombie - dragula and making appropriately scary faces, taking the car for an insurance assessment (the address given was unhelpful), swimming (good lord, four laps wiped me out and i needed a while to catch my breath before doing another four), a good work session before picking up mr smear
another day without our cleaning lady
working during nap time, a horrible discussion about appropriate shows for mr smear, a walk to mr smear's first mini-golf experience and the group he "helped" giving us seven free passes, coming home to shower and catching him for a second toilet poop experience
a big dinner, a very long bedtime, exhausted but restless and feeling sick towards midnight
tuesday 19th:
getting some good work done, crashing around 1.45am after learning that my mother's flight was delayed
regular morning workout after dropping mr smear off (another half a kilo down, apparently), working well (long slog), picking up mr smear and driving home to unload the car and pick up gd, picking up my mom from the airport and dropping her off at home, key confusion leading to us going back to our place to pick up a spare then returning her to hers then dropping gd off at our place then taking mr smear to the hospital for his annual allergy test
the poop at our appointment time and the poop as we returned to the car
the sad news that his dairy allergy has become much more severe, scripts for blood tests and epipens
clementines in the car, dropping him at home and visiting the pharmacy, a long and interesting conversation at the sunshine food company, sailor coming over, managing to organize babysitting for the next evening, taking sailor home and showering mr smear, easy bedtime, sleeping for an hour or two
wednesday 20th:
working hard until 3am
four hours of crazy forgotten dreams, waking up feeling old in my lower back and joints, taking mr smear to school with frightening instructions, sadly witnessing him make one of his best friends cry, and returning home for a haircut (doing a pharmacy run while waiting for gd to return from acupuncture), quickly transforming into something decidedly not-engineer-like (needs product), picking up mr smear, taking him home, eating and leaving for my massage appointment
a great appointment but the hour going by way too fast, a quick shopping mission, coming home only to be sent out to buy mr smear's dinner, picking up a mystery parcel and dressing up nicely and dropping mr smear off with our cousins and picking up sailor and driving straight into rush hour on the way to stellenbosch
two hours on the road with cranial nerve pressure nausea and discomfort
a mixer with no food and unable to drink the wine
a quick stop for chai latte and "healthy" snacks, a fairly comfortable drive back to cape town, transporting mr smear to his own bed, fauda,
thursday 21st:
chores and work and in bed around 1.45am, getting mr smear to school, working for half an hour, joining gd at the school for mr smear's feedback session, more work, picking up mr smear and driving through to rescue gd, which turned into everyone getting lunch and watching a steel band, then gd going home without us two minutes before we were ready
lots of work, and not at all certain what the rest of the day was like although i am fairly confident that i went to sleep very early
friday 22nd:
up at 4-4.30am (about an hour after gd) and getting work done
mr smear's awful cough, no school and cancelling gd's not-hypnotheraphy session, going to wynberg anyway to visit an arts and crafts shop, mr smear throwing a tantrum when we wanted to leave without him getting what he wanted (i'd gotten him a few small things that he did warm up to, but i wasn't caving), hitting surprisingly heavy traffic and getting home late for a skype interview
a generally positive interview, more work, taking mr smear out for a walk (enormous waves and a sewerage fountain or two), complaining once again to the grocery store manager about the lack of dark chocolate on the shelves, running into sailor then literally running to the doctor, rushing back home and doing a couple of pharmacy runs then hurrying to get to our cousins for dinner
a generally pleasant evening, with some unpleasant bits (my sister and gd don't seem to be vibing, my mom calling me a helicopter parent, my cousin tasting the "test" dark chocolate which was awful)
putting mr smear straight to bed, chilling
saturday 23rd:
going to bed after 1.30am
absolutely nothing day, indoors with paw patrol and mr smear napping heavily after i accidentally gave him too much antihistamine, being impressed and engrossed by human resource machine, gd and i playing unstable unicorns for the first time and both enjoying it
sunday 24th:
1am and tired, then up in the middle of the night to mr smear's calls for me, climbing into his bed until he was asleep and waking up in the same place with a stiff neck to be dragged off to the couch to join him watching paw patrol. after a couple of episodes i switched to the playstation, his motorcross skills are improving somewhat but crash bandicoot wasn't for him. a long time getting ready to go and dealing with his snotty nose, quickly visiting my uncle upstairs then heading to town for a birthday party
1. only a couple of the birthday boy's friends were invited, and it was really nice to watch the three best friends playing together outside of school.
2. it's awesome when your kid's friends' parents are people you'd actually like to hang out with.
3. i'm very glad i held out on the gin and tonic until i'd had coffee. our new serbian friend makes STRONG g&t's.
getting a homeless harrasser off another mother's case, "befriending" a tuque seller by throwing his dumbass salespitch back at him (and as i type this realizing that i need a tuque and i should've bought one), taking advantage of mr smear's nap but still feeling groggy after resting a while, waking up to an urgent dinner mission and finding the chinese place closed, watching a bit of honey i shrunk the kids over dinner, mom stopping by with great gifts for gd, a pleasant shower and bedtime for mr smear, thoroughly enjoying thor: ragnarok in spite of passing in and out of consciousness towards the end and
monday 25th:
posting this before getting a bit of work done before going to bed, still very upset that my new onesie has been shrunk in the dryer
tonight he forced a page turn before i realized what was happening and saw the gigantosaurus walking away from the bad little dinosaur, and i found myself hurriedly explaining that the gigantosaurus had digested him and pooped him out.
i feel like i'm going to pay for this.
make that 2.30am... and then getting up half an hour later for a wet bed followed by a tantrum triggered by changing his (wet) hulk shirt for another hulk shirt
5.30am dreaming of stepping in the long earth to organize myself for a canadian burning man
a slow morning but feeling much better than in previous days, taking mr smear to kirstenbosch, wasabi chips and sunglasses, stomping on mole hills, disappearing oranges and bubbles ("hulk smash!"), stalking another new friend and splashing in the pleasantly surprisingly full stream, sailor joining us for lunch, a delicious double-hummus and falafel lunch, mr smear becoming impatient but mostly sweet and learning to be polite, a stroll towards the car and a fall by the river hurting his hands, managing to get him into the car without waking him, the sudafed suddenly wearing off while sailor and i said goodbyes
a quiet drive home, mr smear waking up just after we arrived, a quick chat with my mom
my first attempt to scan an old comic, surprised by a grocery run, dinner and shower and bedtime (mostly smooth), manhunt: unabomber
monday 11th:
some productive time, lots of nostalgia, climbing into bed with a sore throat at 1.40am
4.15am up for mr smear's coughing fit and finding it painful to swallow myself
everyone sleeping in a little, feeling a bit better but still needing a sudafed, gd enjoying teen titans at least as much as mr smear, doing a bit of mobile dev research, breakfast and adventure time before heading out to my therapist
a good session, but failure to update and connect with gd which generated a storm; (mostly) calmly facing the storm and feeling quite good about it - although i now suspect that my relative zen was due to the meds
an apartment chase while i was making a call leaving me giggling and choking when an insurance representative picked up, a pleasant drive to hout bay with mr smear falling asleep *just* before we arrived at our destination, going to their vida instead and learning that we'd dodged a bullet before because their falafel snack pot's dip has dairy in it
a moment on hout bay beach, our visit to the world of birds cut short because mr smear couldn't handle being there without the next day's playdate (serious tantrum)
stopping on the llandudno road to take a whizz and some photos, mr smear having a good time; then stopping at camps bay beach for a fantastic late afternoon stroll in and around the water, both myself and mr smear absolutely loving it in the perfect weather (and gorgeous sunset)
straight home and into the shower, toy story and dinner, a pleasant and quick bedtime, meeting prep and most of the second-to-last episode of manhunt: unabomber, a sudden and violent cranial nerve not-mograine (nausea, dizziness, faintness) that i think went (mostly) away fast because of my self-neck-massage, a good meeting, posting a ton of photos on instagram
tuesday 12th:
a bit of work, finally going to bed just before 2am (with a very sensitive thumb, the latest casualty in the winter dry-skin war)
dream: a fox assassin with a stripe, star and crumpled-up tissue on his forehead who warns his targets by approaching them and saying "ah-TISSUE!"
up early, dropping mr smear off late as usual, getting some work done at my mom's coffee shop, meeting gd at the hospital just in time to sign the documents and find her ward, returning home to pick up mr smear's ready bag and some food for him, dropping by gd quickly then picking up mr smear then returning to the hospital just in time to see her off to surgery, taking mr smear to find lunch and making a bad call - royale eatery has a good reputation, but their vegan offerings just don't taste good. mr smear having a great time playing and eating the side orders and going nuts for their chocolate peanut butter shake (that's brilliant, at least), going back to the hospital expecting gd to be out already and discovering that she hadn't gone in yet - i thank all the gods i don't have a regular job or that would have ruined my day. instead i stopped by the neurologist to leave a message, changed mr smear at their baby station and walked him to watch tennis and walk in the park
"the hard way" (carrying him over my shoulder) with him screaming "i want to walk like a big boy!" was an absolute breakthrough moment for us
a happy but frozen gd, fleeing the air conditioning as soon as we could get her discharge papers signed
heavy traffic home and mr smear passing out, a quick emergency grocery run, waking mr smear getting him to the car, leaving right into rush hour
seeing what most capetonians suffer daily was eye-opening and shocking, waze waiting 10 minutes of gridlock before taking me on various alternate routes, after an hour of discovering new dimensions to the problem and finding my fellow drivers increasingly loathsome i gave up, turned around and was home in less than ten minutes.
both kids crying over the cancelled playdate, coming home and taking mr smear and his bike to the promenade as compensation: he amazed me and made me very proud, riding his plastic motorbike at great speed all the way to the mouille point end of the promenade (i had to jog to keep up), and even though he was tired and somewhat out of breath he understood that he wasn't going to be carried home and either walked or rode most of the way back. i left him with gd, picked up falafel and ran into someone we hadn't heard from in a while, mr smear ate well and enjoyed shower time (i gave him what remained of gd's colourful soap and he took painting the shower doors very seriously), finding and reading a hebrew book i'd lost (the cleaning lady really isn't good with books and comics), mr smear going straight to sleep
completing manhunt: unabomber (excellent), getting into work and random chores
wednesday 13th:
and suddenly it was 2.15 and i was *tired*
a very sore thumb, gd feeling better, a good gym session, a good work session, picking up mr smear, no naps but resting on the couch while he watched boss baby, setting him up with little big planet and cheering him on as he completed the intro level by himself!!!
a family photo struggle, taking mr smear to print it, a visit to the park and bumping into one of his friends - who would not relinquish mr smear's bike and at one point even pushed him off roughly (and there was much drama)
coming home, a quick work meeting preventing me from emergency grocery shopping (i hate running out of tissues at the best of times, but in this case my sinuses were still performing)
a pleasant shower and bedtime, trying to watch defendor and passing out on the couch in spite of the sudafed, at some stage moving to the bed
thursday 14th:
getting up at 1.30am and working through to 4-4.15am, struggling to sleep until mr smear slipped into our bed, which was fine until he fell asleep; at that point i'd been cornered and had to move myself to his bed, having managed to hurt my neck and feeling awful
waking up really tired in a proper lightning storm (that got mr smear excited), gd not able to get in the car, a good run and stretch before work with a bit more shoulder mobility than i'm used to
finding entity framework's code first inability to handle a primary key's type change frustrating
mr smear apparently unimpressed by the substitute teacher, a pleasant ride home (i love him singing along to the chorus of danny gilboa's hayom she'ha'osher yagia)
reading some of leah moore's the complete alice in wonderland graphic novel with mr smear, playing ipad jigsaw puzzles, slash fiction inspiration
aquarium fail, grocery rush, protoplasm visit, emergency shower, quick bedtime, lost in space, couch sleeping (not a good idea)
friday 15th:
mr smear's midnight nightmares, followed by sleeping until morning
<that strange moment when you realize you've actually been sick for a few days and didn't take notes>
starting the day with a shitty feeling
gd joining me for twenty minutes of the school's father's day puppet show, an hour's work at gd's not-hypnotherapist, a visit to the olive branch and picking up a book and adventure time top trumps cards
a very productive meeting with the afrikaburn director
visiting my uncle who'd needed three stitches in his head after falling off his bed the night before (he appears to be on his deathbed) and flailing about helplessly for a few hours before falling asleep and being found by his domestic worker
making it to the temple on time, a pride-filled moment of mr smear singing the chorus of lecha dodi loudly and perfectly and everyone else either in awe or laughing - i giggled uncontrollably
the service running late and rushing to buy a laffa for dinner, everyone tired and crashing early
saturday 16th:
a late morning for all, adventure time
taking gd's phone to the waterfront, being sent to the cape quarter who then sent it to canal walk, picking up a bed roll guard for my uncle (which i would forget to deliver)
an exhausting but pleasurable afternoon playdate to make up for turning back on tuesday, mr smear taking a while to warm up to the girls but eventually playing well, aquarium madness (600 girl guides), ice cream nervousness, kale spinach frozen coconut yoghurt win (he remembered that the green was delicious)
adventure time, dinner and roughhousing
freezing after the shower and starting a headache
mr smear's dragon onesie
finally finishing defendor, really enjoying it
not enjoying a tig nogaro special at all but becoming increasingly certain that i had been cooking a migraine all day
sunday 17th:
sleeping better, waking up feeling much better (still sore and spasmed a bit, but less migraine)
adventure time and a slow start while gd prepped and left for her conversion course final exam, mr smear wearing his dragon onesie to a museum / company gardens playdate, gd meeting us there after her exam, everyone coming to our place for lunch, mr smear coughing into the hummus, taking them home and mr smear passing out on the way back, taking advantage of his nap and getting a much-needed back massage as a father's day gift, watching a bit of brother bear as a family then visiting my uncle upstairs to install the bed roll guard and have a chat about aging, priorities and fixing family karma
showering mr smear and turning an almost-accident into a successful poop in the toilet (hooray!), easy bedtime, ice cream and falling asleep during thor: ragnarok
monday 18th:
a long night dreaming about sleeping correctly, waking up still sore (left shoulder, right sciatica), adventure time:
"oh no, finn is being naughty!"
"no, daddy, finn is FINE!"
leaving late (as usual), mr smear enthusiastically singing along to rob zombie - dragula and making appropriately scary faces, taking the car for an insurance assessment (the address given was unhelpful), swimming (good lord, four laps wiped me out and i needed a while to catch my breath before doing another four), a good work session before picking up mr smear
another day without our cleaning lady
working during nap time, a horrible discussion about appropriate shows for mr smear, a walk to mr smear's first mini-golf experience and the group he "helped" giving us seven free passes, coming home to shower and catching him for a second toilet poop experience
a big dinner, a very long bedtime, exhausted but restless and feeling sick towards midnight
tuesday 19th:
getting some good work done, crashing around 1.45am after learning that my mother's flight was delayed
regular morning workout after dropping mr smear off (another half a kilo down, apparently), working well (long slog), picking up mr smear and driving home to unload the car and pick up gd, picking up my mom from the airport and dropping her off at home, key confusion leading to us going back to our place to pick up a spare then returning her to hers then dropping gd off at our place then taking mr smear to the hospital for his annual allergy test
the poop at our appointment time and the poop as we returned to the car
the sad news that his dairy allergy has become much more severe, scripts for blood tests and epipens
clementines in the car, dropping him at home and visiting the pharmacy, a long and interesting conversation at the sunshine food company, sailor coming over, managing to organize babysitting for the next evening, taking sailor home and showering mr smear, easy bedtime, sleeping for an hour or two
wednesday 20th:
working hard until 3am
four hours of crazy forgotten dreams, waking up feeling old in my lower back and joints, taking mr smear to school with frightening instructions, sadly witnessing him make one of his best friends cry, and returning home for a haircut (doing a pharmacy run while waiting for gd to return from acupuncture), quickly transforming into something decidedly not-engineer-like (needs product), picking up mr smear, taking him home, eating and leaving for my massage appointment
a great appointment but the hour going by way too fast, a quick shopping mission, coming home only to be sent out to buy mr smear's dinner, picking up a mystery parcel and dressing up nicely and dropping mr smear off with our cousins and picking up sailor and driving straight into rush hour on the way to stellenbosch
two hours on the road with cranial nerve pressure nausea and discomfort
a mixer with no food and unable to drink the wine
a quick stop for chai latte and "healthy" snacks, a fairly comfortable drive back to cape town, transporting mr smear to his own bed, fauda,
thursday 21st:
chores and work and in bed around 1.45am, getting mr smear to school, working for half an hour, joining gd at the school for mr smear's feedback session, more work, picking up mr smear and driving through to rescue gd, which turned into everyone getting lunch and watching a steel band, then gd going home without us two minutes before we were ready
lots of work, and not at all certain what the rest of the day was like although i am fairly confident that i went to sleep very early
friday 22nd:
up at 4-4.30am (about an hour after gd) and getting work done
mr smear's awful cough, no school and cancelling gd's not-hypnotheraphy session, going to wynberg anyway to visit an arts and crafts shop, mr smear throwing a tantrum when we wanted to leave without him getting what he wanted (i'd gotten him a few small things that he did warm up to, but i wasn't caving), hitting surprisingly heavy traffic and getting home late for a skype interview
a generally positive interview, more work, taking mr smear out for a walk (enormous waves and a sewerage fountain or two), complaining once again to the grocery store manager about the lack of dark chocolate on the shelves, running into sailor then literally running to the doctor, rushing back home and doing a couple of pharmacy runs then hurrying to get to our cousins for dinner
a generally pleasant evening, with some unpleasant bits (my sister and gd don't seem to be vibing, my mom calling me a helicopter parent, my cousin tasting the "test" dark chocolate which was awful)
putting mr smear straight to bed, chilling
saturday 23rd:
going to bed after 1.30am
absolutely nothing day, indoors with paw patrol and mr smear napping heavily after i accidentally gave him too much antihistamine, being impressed and engrossed by human resource machine, gd and i playing unstable unicorns for the first time and both enjoying it
sunday 24th:
1am and tired, then up in the middle of the night to mr smear's calls for me, climbing into his bed until he was asleep and waking up in the same place with a stiff neck to be dragged off to the couch to join him watching paw patrol. after a couple of episodes i switched to the playstation, his motorcross skills are improving somewhat but crash bandicoot wasn't for him. a long time getting ready to go and dealing with his snotty nose, quickly visiting my uncle upstairs then heading to town for a birthday party
1. only a couple of the birthday boy's friends were invited, and it was really nice to watch the three best friends playing together outside of school.
2. it's awesome when your kid's friends' parents are people you'd actually like to hang out with.
3. i'm very glad i held out on the gin and tonic until i'd had coffee. our new serbian friend makes STRONG g&t's.
getting a homeless harrasser off another mother's case, "befriending" a tuque seller by throwing his dumbass salespitch back at him (and as i type this realizing that i need a tuque and i should've bought one), taking advantage of mr smear's nap but still feeling groggy after resting a while, waking up to an urgent dinner mission and finding the chinese place closed, watching a bit of honey i shrunk the kids over dinner, mom stopping by with great gifts for gd, a pleasant shower and bedtime for mr smear, thoroughly enjoying thor: ragnarok in spite of passing in and out of consciousness towards the end and
monday 25th:
posting this before getting a bit of work done before going to bed, still very upset that my new onesie has been shrunk in the dryer
Thursday, June 14, 2018
random thoughts
- i've always been glad that i've never worked or studied in a place where i have to travel with traffic during rush hour, but every now and again i forget that that's a thing and i get stuck for a bit. today i left home using waze, though, and once it realized i wasn't going anywhere (ten minutes' gridlock trying to get to the N1/N2 onramp) it took me through all sorts of areas i'd never been in or considered travelling through. and boy, did i get to see what cape town's rush hour traffic really looks like for a LOT of people living in this city. it's horrifying, not just how long it takes to move but the kinds of driving you have to deal with whenever there's a moment's flow. i cannot begin to fathom the depths of patience that any of you who know what i'm talking about have, after an hour of struggle and vying for position while being cut off by buses i turned tail and fled the less than ten minute drive going in the other direction. i just don't know how this is a thing that millions of people have come to accept in their lives, and i know cape town's just one city of (i guess) thousands with this kind of problem. surely people think "let's try something else"?
- if chocolate was sold in half-slabs i probably wouldn't eat as much
- in spite of today's storm, we here in cape town must remain vigilant and water-wise.
do you know how much water we could save if everyone shaved their heads? our local representatives should show how much they care (and some solidarity) and lead by example!
#capetown #watercrisis #shaveandsave #shavewater #wearedryingoverhere
Sunday, June 10, 2018
israeli apartheid
people who claim that israel is an apartheid state to a captive audience upsets me in a special way. to suggest that the palestinians are israeli citizens when they refuse to accept israel's very existence and who operate entirely under the control of the arab nations and their proxies is absurd.
that's like claiming that the pakistanis are suffering under indian apartheid.
do you know who suffers the most from these outrageous and inflammatory claims? the palestinians. as long as they can't see a way to negotiate some kind of resolution with israel they will continue to be neglected, tormented and deluded by their own leadership.
that's like claiming that the pakistanis are suffering under indian apartheid.
do you know who suffers the most from these outrageous and inflammatory claims? the palestinians. as long as they can't see a way to negotiate some kind of resolution with israel they will continue to be neglected, tormented and deluded by their own leadership.
spine align
one shoulder higher than the other, neck and back sore and unstable. after a day of discomfort, possible illness, and compulsively typing this up (kinda) and going to bed. looking forward to tuesday, when gd gets a nerve block, and praying that it's successful.
tuesday 29th may:
going to bed around 3.10am after a sad conversation with my mom about my cousin not supporting his wife; gd and i both unable to sleep and for a while giggling over stories of mr smear
struggling to get up and get the car to the shop early, mr smear's cough keeping him home another day, an empty police station, a long and stressful struggle to get mr smear out the house, a generally fun morning at the waterfront, re-purchasing an expensive gift for my mother because we'd managed to misplace the original during the move, mr smear making friends on the hamley's train and getting away with being super bossy (that hysterically awkward moment when he yelled instructions at the confused five-year-old, then promptly counted to three in hebrew before sending him to a timeout)
the joy of watching him demolish a falafel wrap so eagerly that other people were entertained (he did leave me a couple of bites), home on the bus, slowly checking items off my todo list, a phone call informing me they'd need my car another day but receiving another one later telling me to pick it up, mr smear eating two toasted not-cheeses as well as half of mine, big tantrums before gd's class and taking him with us, a class friend helping me keep him occupied with advanced hide-and-seek, and everyone loving gd's not-cheesecake
terrible coughing fits on the way home, even though he passed out and we had to wake him repeatedly to medicate him
13 reasons why, more checklist stuff then finally going to bed just before midnight
wednesday 30th:
once or twice up for mr smear, but nothing serious; a good start to the day, dropping him off at school (yay!) and going to the new gym
excitedly getting ready to hit the bag then realizing i'd left my gear at home, swimming instead and feeling pretty good about it
a couple of hours getting work done in what is effectively a shared workspace, picking up mr smear and learning he'd pooped at school (amazing!)
mr smear repeating "the boy is such live-ay" the entire way home (with some confusing stories thrown in for good measure), i arrived desperately hungry
the long search for gd's jewish name
(fuzzy memories)
taking mr smear to the aquarium, a sandpit full of smarties, showering him before my mom's big birthday dinner, my sister being distant, being ungraciously awkward about being thanked for picking up the tab, an episode of the mechanism and passing out early
thursday 31st:
early and cold, a tense drive to school, failing to decode mr smear's quote with his friend's "but", grabbing coffee at my mom's shop and easily getting to gd's not-hypnotherapist, work progress, signing gd's gym membership form, a long time filing an accident report in a smelly police station (an almost unpleasant interaction but we resolved it quickly), late picking up mr smear, a waterfront mission that included watching mr smear wolf down another falafel wrap with BIG bites and running into a cousin from johannesburg, getting everyone home then meeting sailor at bootlegger for a couple of productive hours, a quick grocery run, taking mr smear to stomp in promenade puddles and him falling asleep on my shoulder just before my mom came to babysit, gd's last class, spirituality and my revelation about the meaning of "the lord is one", my nose running through guided meditation, hurrying home, a lot of chatter, 13 reasons why, inbox clearing and bill paying and a massive howling rainstorm and
friday 1st june:
lots of work with perpetual regressions because microsoft's devs are f***wits (you can either run load tests or unit tests, but not both; enabling load tests resets your previous choices; you can't choose your endpoint path and it might just disappear altogether) [wow, turned out that all of that was some very weird mystical bug happening]
finally going to bed after 2.30am, but taking about half an hour to get there
waking up in the middle of my four hours' sleep for a painful coughing fit, registering the cold draft while breakfasting (mr smear preferring to eat *my* pancakes, of course), dropping him off and heading to the gym (impatience making me take a much longer detour)
a quick run (jog?), some bag work, a little experimentation with the other equipment, some stretching and then suddenly an hour had passed; a compliment for my tattoo taking me by surprise, a much better experience at a proper desk, figuring out the load testing one stupid design decision at a time
figuring out the parking ticket validation the hard way, picking up mr smear and telling the teacher she'd been spelling mr smear's name wrong the whole term
waze teaching me a new way home (which would've been even faster if i hadn't keep taking wrong turns), gd in bed when we got home so putting on the good dinosaur and at some point remembering to feed him, gd coming out and letting me work for a bit and then taking mr smear to the beach and park
heavy waves and foam, mr smear attaching himself to a beautiful little girl and her nanny, forming a little playgroup and having a great time; eventually going to the supermarket to pick up a few things (with runny noses, and none of those things were tissues) and bumping into an old homeroom teacher (who remembers me surprisingly well)
rushing to meet a friend of mr smear's due to a misunderstanding, twenty minutes of screaming and crying and dropping to the floor to get home because i couldn't carry him and the groceries together
going straight out to the temple, arriving in time for shabbat rina and mr smear making me really proud by singing a whole bunch of the songs, rushing after a friend of his and spending the rest of the service looking after them with his dad
great kiddush, his friend grabbing a fistful of challah before the blessing was finished, coming home to discover that my shirt had been inside out, kiddush and dinner and mom coming over
mr smear falling asleep on gd, 13 reasons why
saturday 2nd:
being displaced at 5am
winter-dry cracked knuckle, waking up in a foul mood and flying straight into deep distress (giving up my appointment with the neurosurgeon so that gd could demand surgery)
recovery, showering mr smear and taking him to the only repeatedly affordable indoor amusement (the aquarium), a milestone moment getting him to pee in a urinal (although of course he had to sneeze a huge blob as he started, which led to touching the urinal, and there was no way to properly wash his hands)
arranging coffee before realizing i was late to take my mom to the airport, mr smear stuffing himself, a long drive to the airport with a detour, mr smear falling asleep just in time to say a sleepy goodbye to his granny
a long, uncomfortable drive back to town (the seat height was wrong and my neck being at a bad angle made me woozy) only to get a call from my mom using a borrowed phone to ask me to bring hers back, there and back again and mr smear waking up when i finally got him home
parking my mom's car, chinese groceries, woolworths (almost not recognizing our old cleaning lady's son), peacefully negotiating mr smear to a healthy playtime while getting things done, a family viewing of an american tail, mr smear loving wasabi seaweed, easily reading him to bed, two episodes of 13 reasons why interrupted by an urgent purchase of an iron man onesie (for me, finally) - mostly great but some of the second season is infuriatingly rewriting the first
sunday 3rd:
nothing much until 2.20am
up around 8.30 with a stiff neck from sleeping badly, and spending an inordinate amount of time (including dev time) trying to cheaply make a call to an israeli number (egged) to book a ticket because their website is indecipherable regardless of which languages you can read
rushing to join friends at the park for a very nice playdate, picking up our favourite artisan bread (i really should learn what it's called) and a smoothie before returning home to slug down a coffee to be able to take mr smear to canal walk to meet our brazilian friends; sitting with them while they ate pizza, toy shopping and putting down a lot of money for a collection of dc female superhero action figures, grabbing coffee and opening the box to discover that it was actually batgirl and a highschool (whoops!), running (literally) to swap for five figures (guessing the prices and coming out with them owing me 40c), coming back to find that they hadn't killed mr smear (although they did give him cocoa powder before realizing that it might've been dairy, fortunately it wasn't), their little girl freaking out about mr smear's new toys (after she'd just gotten a whole bunch of things) and her father caving quickly and taking her to buy a large wonder woman (damn), picking up diapers at game on the way out and standing in an insane queue for a while before a manager told me where to find the express counter
mr smear passing out while waze misdirected me (unclear instructions, i'm sure the route was fine), arriving at the park early for our third playdate in a freezing wind, waking mr smear who was not impressed and taking him home where the playdate resumed instead; aside from lots of spilled drinks, a very nice evening with amazing chinese takeout (it fit with the weekend's general theme of living beyond our means)
showertime fun and using cold water to successfully disincentivize undesirable behaviour, passing out while reading to mr smear and sleeping for a couple of hours,
monday 4th:
watching half an episode of 13 reasons why before getting things done - some important and some not - and eventually going to bed around 2.45 after scribbling these notes
early up feeling slightly better, leaving late, dropping mr smear off and returning home to pick up gd and almost making it to the hospital before the water pipe disconnected and we jumped out of the car worried it was on fire - being grateful to the dudes who stopped to help while i fumbled trying to get hold of roadside assistance, parking safely and running to gd's appointment
a shared appointment, a plan of action for her and a pill for me (apparently i'm suffering from migraine symptoms without the migraines, which i consider very lucky)
walking to the post office to mail documents to vfmp, picking up coffee (and assisting my mom's manager with his phone) and picking up mr smear on a day growing ever hotter, getting him home by bus (a LONG wait at the civic centre), carrying him the last part into bed
roadside assistance not only being unhelpful in finding a place to take the car, but both transposing the digits of my number and failing to instruct the breakdown services to contact me
stuffing myself with avocado and hummus (separately, though, i'm not a fan of the combo) and lying down for half an hour, finally managing to sleep two minutes before my alarm went off
quick coffee, learning that the breakdown truck had been waiting for me and jumping into an uber, loading the car and sitting in traffic for a very long time (discussing homelessness, transport infrastructure and dogs), signing the job sheet and waiting for ten minutes before my uber driver cancelled on me, a mangy man wiggling his loose teeth at me with his finger before justifying his unprofessional physical aggression with what sounded like racism (only with his accent, i'm not completely certain that he said what i heard), a second long uber wait but a relatively (for peak traffic) clear road home
a rush to change mr smear, walk to my mom's car, load it, deliver my mom's bookclub books and then spend some time talking with cousins who've just returned from israel while mr smear watched simon
rushing home for dinner (he ate a lot of kimchi fried rice before making a pie disappear, shower and bedtime, lying on the couch freezing for an episode and a half of 13 reasons why, work and tasks
tuesday 5th:
and eventually discovering at 2.30am that i'd been barking up the wrong tree with test configurations, conveniently the same time my vision went fuzzy with exhaustion
regular sleep interruptions for mr smear crying out in his sleep, running late as usual, learning that mr smear had skipped the toilet the day before and peed in the garden instead (so proud!), the security guard pointing out a flat tire which completely disrupted the second morning in a row; needing a pick-me-up coffee smoothie but the place next door only had dairy, walking to the hospital with a couple of stops to look for helix replacements - the first place didn't have the size i need and the operator at the second couldn't be bothered to pause her personal phone call to ask if i needed anything
arriving on time when the surgeon was running late, a half hour examination / discussion and walking out really excited to schedule an epidural for gd that we hope might actually bring her some relief
ubering to pick up my mom's car, picking up mr smear (who had made his teacher stop dancing by crying), filling the tank, no naps and hunger and sailor and task management solutions (asana fail) and presentation software beating diagram software for making diagrams and a long meeting
mr smear's conjunctivitus
a long pharmacy visit (bad timing and renovations), taking mr smear to the park and needing to tell the homeless guy on the jungle gym to keep his hands off my son (he was being "helpful"), great swing experiencing (mr smear likes my boxing slips), the other park and four little friends and breakdancing, home for dinner and shower and me choosing a nature documentary before bedtime
a difficult bedtime but only because of his eyes, 13 reasons why, meeting prep and a long meeting (my contributions were openly acknowledged, that was gratifying)
learning that gd's important physio appointment was cancelled because she didn't check her mail
wednesday 6th:
learning powerpoint animation and working / doing random things until 2.30am, taking my first pill before bed - it definitely had *an* effect, not sure how much i actually slept but the drowsiness and weariness made getting up lousy and slow (having checked the side-effects, definitely one of them)
taking mr smear to the doctor and forgetting one of the reasons (we'll have to take him back), big grocery shopping (and forgetting a few of the things) and gd's experience with a cashier with a bad attitude, a little stress unpacking while dealing with mr smear's eyes and nose and diapers, returning my mom's car and taking a remarkably comfortable uber to pick up mine (almost falling asleep a few times), worrying warnings about damaging a gasket, driving home feeling relaxed (was it the meds? it must've been the meds), working well then going for my massage
feeling good afterwards, the revelation that i have an old problem with my ac joint i've never had examined, there's nothing like a little road rage to undo a good massage, completing the presentation, taking mr smear to the park (he met a little girl he called wonder woman, and she called him "my superhero boy"), a tough dinner (he was exhausted and frustrated and clingy and not hungry), shower, and a bedtime where i think he passed out before i started reading (he was hiding under the blanket)
finishing 13 reasons why and feeling thoroughly cheated - not only did season 2 rewrite significant chunks of season 1, but even granting them that the finale went from absolutely horrifying to thoroughly underwhelming in the blink of an eye and i was left dissatisfied
taking forever to get into work, becoming nervous about growth charts (not that that helps)
thursday 7th:
and then it was 1am and way past time for bed, and then 1.30am...
... 5.30am wakeup call from mr smear...
... the meds making it difficult to drag myself out of bed, the week of mondays continuing with me forgetting mr smear's schoolbag (the teacher and assistants were very kind about it), arriving at the gym and very slowly getting myself to the treadmill, stretching, and working - signing up for the fancy gym has so far proven completely worthwhile
a big mistake choosing the way to the school to pick up mr smear, the relief of hearing he'd had a good day, getting him home and into bed and passing out myself for a while
more visual studio testing struggles until suddenly everything worked and i hadn't made any significant changes... so that was a waste of a week of effort, with zero satisfaction from completing my task and finally being able to move on
gd feeling really sick, eventually taking mr smear to the waterfront on a miserable day; in time for a ten minute visit at the aquarium, getting falafel was his ploy to be close to the playground, running into our brazilian friends at the pharmacy, leaving them while their little girl threw a tantrum, a very quick grocery run, eating in the car, driving home in the rain, pre-bedtime, shower (super needy, which i realized was exhaustion), straight into bed, killjoys, meeting, enjoying the being canadian documentary,
friday 8th:
suddenly almost 1am and feeling wiped out, establishing after three nights that the meds were making me absurdly gassy and getting me out of bed regularly to pee - maybe they're just aging me really fast?
slightly less tough getting up, successfully reintroducing mr smear to maize meal
gym, running very conscious of my left shoulder, planking, stretching (reconfiguring); an hour's office time
a good drive home, the iron man onesie! coffee, lunch, spar, after ten minutes stuck leaving the parking lot realizing i'd forgotten something
scarf hunt stress followed by missing car keys (they were in my pocket the whole time), taking mr smear to the aquarium where he stalked a boy until they became friends
fast grocery run, home for kiddush, dinner and monster island, a fast bedtime, manhunt: unabomber episodes, a little mini-metro
saturday 9th:
and then it was past midnight, and iron man needed to brush his teeth and go to bed (without meds)
waking up in the middle of the night and seeing an update that SARS finally deposited my refund (relief!)
why doesn't sleeping make me feel rested? going to the temple, running around with mr smear and two little girls until i almost fainted (which preceeded me feeling horrible for the rest of the day)
picking up a musical toilet seat with handles and a step for mr smear... and experiencing that dark feeling when you break an important plastic piece on an unreturnable product's first day. compounded by the guilt that my reaction to breaking it wasn't particularly healthy and my son got to see it :$
song of the day: not shine on you crazy diamond, although mr smear thoroughly enjoyed watching the full video with me. it was the musical toilet's it's a small world after all
napping, watching monster island with mr smear, taking him to the grocery store, then the park, then the grocery store on the way back (for pears he wanted and then didn't eat)
an evening of freaky eaters and manhunt: unabomber
sunday 10th:
posting and going to bed (ooh, 1.30am)
tuesday 29th may:
going to bed around 3.10am after a sad conversation with my mom about my cousin not supporting his wife; gd and i both unable to sleep and for a while giggling over stories of mr smear
struggling to get up and get the car to the shop early, mr smear's cough keeping him home another day, an empty police station, a long and stressful struggle to get mr smear out the house, a generally fun morning at the waterfront, re-purchasing an expensive gift for my mother because we'd managed to misplace the original during the move, mr smear making friends on the hamley's train and getting away with being super bossy (that hysterically awkward moment when he yelled instructions at the confused five-year-old, then promptly counted to three in hebrew before sending him to a timeout)
the joy of watching him demolish a falafel wrap so eagerly that other people were entertained (he did leave me a couple of bites), home on the bus, slowly checking items off my todo list, a phone call informing me they'd need my car another day but receiving another one later telling me to pick it up, mr smear eating two toasted not-cheeses as well as half of mine, big tantrums before gd's class and taking him with us, a class friend helping me keep him occupied with advanced hide-and-seek, and everyone loving gd's not-cheesecake
terrible coughing fits on the way home, even though he passed out and we had to wake him repeatedly to medicate him
13 reasons why, more checklist stuff then finally going to bed just before midnight
wednesday 30th:
once or twice up for mr smear, but nothing serious; a good start to the day, dropping him off at school (yay!) and going to the new gym
excitedly getting ready to hit the bag then realizing i'd left my gear at home, swimming instead and feeling pretty good about it
a couple of hours getting work done in what is effectively a shared workspace, picking up mr smear and learning he'd pooped at school (amazing!)
mr smear repeating "the boy is such live-ay" the entire way home (with some confusing stories thrown in for good measure), i arrived desperately hungry
the long search for gd's jewish name
(fuzzy memories)
taking mr smear to the aquarium, a sandpit full of smarties, showering him before my mom's big birthday dinner, my sister being distant, being ungraciously awkward about being thanked for picking up the tab, an episode of the mechanism and passing out early
thursday 31st:
early and cold, a tense drive to school, failing to decode mr smear's quote with his friend's "but", grabbing coffee at my mom's shop and easily getting to gd's not-hypnotherapist, work progress, signing gd's gym membership form, a long time filing an accident report in a smelly police station (an almost unpleasant interaction but we resolved it quickly), late picking up mr smear, a waterfront mission that included watching mr smear wolf down another falafel wrap with BIG bites and running into a cousin from johannesburg, getting everyone home then meeting sailor at bootlegger for a couple of productive hours, a quick grocery run, taking mr smear to stomp in promenade puddles and him falling asleep on my shoulder just before my mom came to babysit, gd's last class, spirituality and my revelation about the meaning of "the lord is one", my nose running through guided meditation, hurrying home, a lot of chatter, 13 reasons why, inbox clearing and bill paying and a massive howling rainstorm and
friday 1st june:
lots of work with perpetual regressions because microsoft's devs are f***wits (you can either run load tests or unit tests, but not both; enabling load tests resets your previous choices; you can't choose your endpoint path and it might just disappear altogether) [wow, turned out that all of that was some very weird mystical bug happening]
finally going to bed after 2.30am, but taking about half an hour to get there
waking up in the middle of my four hours' sleep for a painful coughing fit, registering the cold draft while breakfasting (mr smear preferring to eat *my* pancakes, of course), dropping him off and heading to the gym (impatience making me take a much longer detour)
a quick run (jog?), some bag work, a little experimentation with the other equipment, some stretching and then suddenly an hour had passed; a compliment for my tattoo taking me by surprise, a much better experience at a proper desk, figuring out the load testing one stupid design decision at a time
figuring out the parking ticket validation the hard way, picking up mr smear and telling the teacher she'd been spelling mr smear's name wrong the whole term
waze teaching me a new way home (which would've been even faster if i hadn't keep taking wrong turns), gd in bed when we got home so putting on the good dinosaur and at some point remembering to feed him, gd coming out and letting me work for a bit and then taking mr smear to the beach and park
heavy waves and foam, mr smear attaching himself to a beautiful little girl and her nanny, forming a little playgroup and having a great time; eventually going to the supermarket to pick up a few things (with runny noses, and none of those things were tissues) and bumping into an old homeroom teacher (who remembers me surprisingly well)
rushing to meet a friend of mr smear's due to a misunderstanding, twenty minutes of screaming and crying and dropping to the floor to get home because i couldn't carry him and the groceries together
going straight out to the temple, arriving in time for shabbat rina and mr smear making me really proud by singing a whole bunch of the songs, rushing after a friend of his and spending the rest of the service looking after them with his dad
great kiddush, his friend grabbing a fistful of challah before the blessing was finished, coming home to discover that my shirt had been inside out, kiddush and dinner and mom coming over
mr smear falling asleep on gd, 13 reasons why
saturday 2nd:
being displaced at 5am
winter-dry cracked knuckle, waking up in a foul mood and flying straight into deep distress (giving up my appointment with the neurosurgeon so that gd could demand surgery)
recovery, showering mr smear and taking him to the only repeatedly affordable indoor amusement (the aquarium), a milestone moment getting him to pee in a urinal (although of course he had to sneeze a huge blob as he started, which led to touching the urinal, and there was no way to properly wash his hands)
arranging coffee before realizing i was late to take my mom to the airport, mr smear stuffing himself, a long drive to the airport with a detour, mr smear falling asleep just in time to say a sleepy goodbye to his granny
a long, uncomfortable drive back to town (the seat height was wrong and my neck being at a bad angle made me woozy) only to get a call from my mom using a borrowed phone to ask me to bring hers back, there and back again and mr smear waking up when i finally got him home
parking my mom's car, chinese groceries, woolworths (almost not recognizing our old cleaning lady's son), peacefully negotiating mr smear to a healthy playtime while getting things done, a family viewing of an american tail, mr smear loving wasabi seaweed, easily reading him to bed, two episodes of 13 reasons why interrupted by an urgent purchase of an iron man onesie (for me, finally) - mostly great but some of the second season is infuriatingly rewriting the first
sunday 3rd:
nothing much until 2.20am
up around 8.30 with a stiff neck from sleeping badly, and spending an inordinate amount of time (including dev time) trying to cheaply make a call to an israeli number (egged) to book a ticket because their website is indecipherable regardless of which languages you can read
rushing to join friends at the park for a very nice playdate, picking up our favourite artisan bread (i really should learn what it's called) and a smoothie before returning home to slug down a coffee to be able to take mr smear to canal walk to meet our brazilian friends; sitting with them while they ate pizza, toy shopping and putting down a lot of money for a collection of dc female superhero action figures, grabbing coffee and opening the box to discover that it was actually batgirl and a highschool (whoops!), running (literally) to swap for five figures (guessing the prices and coming out with them owing me 40c), coming back to find that they hadn't killed mr smear (although they did give him cocoa powder before realizing that it might've been dairy, fortunately it wasn't), their little girl freaking out about mr smear's new toys (after she'd just gotten a whole bunch of things) and her father caving quickly and taking her to buy a large wonder woman (damn), picking up diapers at game on the way out and standing in an insane queue for a while before a manager told me where to find the express counter
mr smear passing out while waze misdirected me (unclear instructions, i'm sure the route was fine), arriving at the park early for our third playdate in a freezing wind, waking mr smear who was not impressed and taking him home where the playdate resumed instead; aside from lots of spilled drinks, a very nice evening with amazing chinese takeout (it fit with the weekend's general theme of living beyond our means)
showertime fun and using cold water to successfully disincentivize undesirable behaviour, passing out while reading to mr smear and sleeping for a couple of hours,
monday 4th:
watching half an episode of 13 reasons why before getting things done - some important and some not - and eventually going to bed around 2.45 after scribbling these notes
early up feeling slightly better, leaving late, dropping mr smear off and returning home to pick up gd and almost making it to the hospital before the water pipe disconnected and we jumped out of the car worried it was on fire - being grateful to the dudes who stopped to help while i fumbled trying to get hold of roadside assistance, parking safely and running to gd's appointment
a shared appointment, a plan of action for her and a pill for me (apparently i'm suffering from migraine symptoms without the migraines, which i consider very lucky)
walking to the post office to mail documents to vfmp, picking up coffee (and assisting my mom's manager with his phone) and picking up mr smear on a day growing ever hotter, getting him home by bus (a LONG wait at the civic centre), carrying him the last part into bed
roadside assistance not only being unhelpful in finding a place to take the car, but both transposing the digits of my number and failing to instruct the breakdown services to contact me
stuffing myself with avocado and hummus (separately, though, i'm not a fan of the combo) and lying down for half an hour, finally managing to sleep two minutes before my alarm went off
quick coffee, learning that the breakdown truck had been waiting for me and jumping into an uber, loading the car and sitting in traffic for a very long time (discussing homelessness, transport infrastructure and dogs), signing the job sheet and waiting for ten minutes before my uber driver cancelled on me, a mangy man wiggling his loose teeth at me with his finger before justifying his unprofessional physical aggression with what sounded like racism (only with his accent, i'm not completely certain that he said what i heard), a second long uber wait but a relatively (for peak traffic) clear road home
a rush to change mr smear, walk to my mom's car, load it, deliver my mom's bookclub books and then spend some time talking with cousins who've just returned from israel while mr smear watched simon
rushing home for dinner (he ate a lot of kimchi fried rice before making a pie disappear, shower and bedtime, lying on the couch freezing for an episode and a half of 13 reasons why, work and tasks
tuesday 5th:
and eventually discovering at 2.30am that i'd been barking up the wrong tree with test configurations, conveniently the same time my vision went fuzzy with exhaustion
regular sleep interruptions for mr smear crying out in his sleep, running late as usual, learning that mr smear had skipped the toilet the day before and peed in the garden instead (so proud!), the security guard pointing out a flat tire which completely disrupted the second morning in a row; needing a pick-me-up coffee smoothie but the place next door only had dairy, walking to the hospital with a couple of stops to look for helix replacements - the first place didn't have the size i need and the operator at the second couldn't be bothered to pause her personal phone call to ask if i needed anything
arriving on time when the surgeon was running late, a half hour examination / discussion and walking out really excited to schedule an epidural for gd that we hope might actually bring her some relief
ubering to pick up my mom's car, picking up mr smear (who had made his teacher stop dancing by crying), filling the tank, no naps and hunger and sailor and task management solutions (asana fail) and presentation software beating diagram software for making diagrams and a long meeting
mr smear's conjunctivitus
a long pharmacy visit (bad timing and renovations), taking mr smear to the park and needing to tell the homeless guy on the jungle gym to keep his hands off my son (he was being "helpful"), great swing experiencing (mr smear likes my boxing slips), the other park and four little friends and breakdancing, home for dinner and shower and me choosing a nature documentary before bedtime
a difficult bedtime but only because of his eyes, 13 reasons why, meeting prep and a long meeting (my contributions were openly acknowledged, that was gratifying)
learning that gd's important physio appointment was cancelled because she didn't check her mail
wednesday 6th:
learning powerpoint animation and working / doing random things until 2.30am, taking my first pill before bed - it definitely had *an* effect, not sure how much i actually slept but the drowsiness and weariness made getting up lousy and slow (having checked the side-effects, definitely one of them)
taking mr smear to the doctor and forgetting one of the reasons (we'll have to take him back), big grocery shopping (and forgetting a few of the things) and gd's experience with a cashier with a bad attitude, a little stress unpacking while dealing with mr smear's eyes and nose and diapers, returning my mom's car and taking a remarkably comfortable uber to pick up mine (almost falling asleep a few times), worrying warnings about damaging a gasket, driving home feeling relaxed (was it the meds? it must've been the meds), working well then going for my massage
feeling good afterwards, the revelation that i have an old problem with my ac joint i've never had examined, there's nothing like a little road rage to undo a good massage, completing the presentation, taking mr smear to the park (he met a little girl he called wonder woman, and she called him "my superhero boy"), a tough dinner (he was exhausted and frustrated and clingy and not hungry), shower, and a bedtime where i think he passed out before i started reading (he was hiding under the blanket)
finishing 13 reasons why and feeling thoroughly cheated - not only did season 2 rewrite significant chunks of season 1, but even granting them that the finale went from absolutely horrifying to thoroughly underwhelming in the blink of an eye and i was left dissatisfied
taking forever to get into work, becoming nervous about growth charts (not that that helps)
thursday 7th:
and then it was 1am and way past time for bed, and then 1.30am...
... 5.30am wakeup call from mr smear...
... the meds making it difficult to drag myself out of bed, the week of mondays continuing with me forgetting mr smear's schoolbag (the teacher and assistants were very kind about it), arriving at the gym and very slowly getting myself to the treadmill, stretching, and working - signing up for the fancy gym has so far proven completely worthwhile
a big mistake choosing the way to the school to pick up mr smear, the relief of hearing he'd had a good day, getting him home and into bed and passing out myself for a while
more visual studio testing struggles until suddenly everything worked and i hadn't made any significant changes... so that was a waste of a week of effort, with zero satisfaction from completing my task and finally being able to move on
gd feeling really sick, eventually taking mr smear to the waterfront on a miserable day; in time for a ten minute visit at the aquarium, getting falafel was his ploy to be close to the playground, running into our brazilian friends at the pharmacy, leaving them while their little girl threw a tantrum, a very quick grocery run, eating in the car, driving home in the rain, pre-bedtime, shower (super needy, which i realized was exhaustion), straight into bed, killjoys, meeting, enjoying the being canadian documentary,
friday 8th:
suddenly almost 1am and feeling wiped out, establishing after three nights that the meds were making me absurdly gassy and getting me out of bed regularly to pee - maybe they're just aging me really fast?
slightly less tough getting up, successfully reintroducing mr smear to maize meal
gym, running very conscious of my left shoulder, planking, stretching (reconfiguring); an hour's office time
a good drive home, the iron man onesie! coffee, lunch, spar, after ten minutes stuck leaving the parking lot realizing i'd forgotten something
scarf hunt stress followed by missing car keys (they were in my pocket the whole time), taking mr smear to the aquarium where he stalked a boy until they became friends
fast grocery run, home for kiddush, dinner and monster island, a fast bedtime, manhunt: unabomber episodes, a little mini-metro
saturday 9th:
and then it was past midnight, and iron man needed to brush his teeth and go to bed (without meds)
waking up in the middle of the night and seeing an update that SARS finally deposited my refund (relief!)
why doesn't sleeping make me feel rested? going to the temple, running around with mr smear and two little girls until i almost fainted (which preceeded me feeling horrible for the rest of the day)
picking up a musical toilet seat with handles and a step for mr smear... and experiencing that dark feeling when you break an important plastic piece on an unreturnable product's first day. compounded by the guilt that my reaction to breaking it wasn't particularly healthy and my son got to see it :$
song of the day: not shine on you crazy diamond, although mr smear thoroughly enjoyed watching the full video with me. it was the musical toilet's it's a small world after all
napping, watching monster island with mr smear, taking him to the grocery store, then the park, then the grocery store on the way back (for pears he wanted and then didn't eat)
an evening of freaky eaters and manhunt: unabomber
sunday 10th:
posting and going to bed (ooh, 1.30am)
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