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Sunday, February 22, 2015

obsessing over open

yesterday:

6am, waking up for the case of the missing inhaler, unable to return to sleep and eventually getting up to head over to comfort gd after she learned that the doctor she needed to see doesn't get to the clinic until 10am after she needed to get to work, when she'd been instructed the evening before to arrive at 8.45.

...

dear google, you're supposed to be the greatest when it comes to searching: so why is it that whenever i desperately need to find an email use your mobile app, it can't be found? yet when i enter the same query into my desktop browser... whoop! there it is.

...

it's hard to be excited about contributing to an open source project when 99% of my effort is directed to setting up my dev environment so that i can run tests locally that are only failing because nobody bothered to document how the meta-comments are handled. i feel like my inability to find the project owners in real life and slap them upside the head is only contributing to the problems our entire industry is plagued with.

passing out from hunger and exhaustion while reading while waiting for gd and her friend to be ready for lunch. awesome copper branch bowls! wasting away while gd did some emergency shopping.

straight into bed for a wild nap and a half, waking up, chatting with my mom and putting on austin powers 2 while making dinner (it took me that long to do the dishes, chop and steam the veggies and mix it all up), then trevor noah's you laugh but it's true, which is interesting, amusing and decidedly cathartic.

[a sore tooth to go with my healing itch to go with wondering if it'll be possible to fix things with k-twang*]

today:

3am dragged out of bed to shower and switch bandaids
a night full of weird dreams that bled into a semi-awake state, so in and out of confused consciousness. a beautifully relaxed morning, slowly but surely chopping down the chore tree.

* i almost sent k-twang an apology this morning, but the more i looked at it the more i felt like i was simply placating... everything i wrote about his wedding was absolutely valid and correct, even if it wasn't nice and could have been (slightly) less scathing. i will not apologize for my honesty, for responding reasonably in the face of someone i cared about forcing me to make sacrifices to feed his and his not-yet wife's egos. he's bloody lucky i found out in time to back out, because if i'd arrived in south africa and *then* found out he might well have found himself in a hospital.
no, i do believe that they owe me an apology - which i don't expect they'll ever see. do i need to be the bigger man to keep family together when they're particularly inconsiderate family? should i be forgiving because it's not his fault he was badly raised? to what end?

---
why i'm moving back to south africa:
his description of western loneliness is on the mark, in south africa you're forced to pay attention to other people and your surroundings, and when you realize that most people in the west are basically walking dead with so little to complain about that they create weird problems - sometimes very large, very real weird problems - it's hard to get a handle on your new environment. both professionally and personal security-wise i'm glad to be in canada, but it's very tough to make real connections with people here because almost everyone in north america is conditioned to keep their heads down, avoid eye contact and look out for number one. there're a lot of wonderful people here, but it's such a controlled society that they're desperate for simple, honest contact and they often don't know what to do with it when they find it.
i don't know how coherent that is, but at the end of the day south africa has a very social culture. i believe that the all-round craziness brings people together and sets better priorities and perspectives.

---
getting rid of cyclists: great attitude!

ooh, look - moderate muslims ARE capable of taking action! that inspires hope :)

utah homeless problem is being eradicated: it's nice to see that someone did the math and came out with a win for everyone! welfare needs to be done right, though, it's unfortunate that this is a rare situation.

story point estimation: no, i didn't think this would be that exciting either, but a method that considers environmental factors and spits out reliable results? estimating software development time is a nightmare, and this looks properly helpful.

good beehive design: honey on tap.

free online cartoon streaming!

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