"poetically hectic"

* the above phrase hijacked from moonflake

wr just left after spending a couple of hours passing along english literature material from his bachelor's degree (and leaving me with absolutely wonderful books and things!). i'd forgotten that he loves william blake - tiger so much that he has a tiger tattooed on his chest, and he liked my response (dead eye) ^_^

it was really a lot of fun pouring over the material with him - the two of us and literature are like two little children with a chest of cool toys :)

i talked with spinnit on the phone a couple of times today, and it wasn't at all uncomfortable. that's actually very unusual. we agreed not to meet up tonight because we've managed, during the course of a week, to realize that we can't trust ourselves to meet alone and say goodbye in a short span of time. i'm very, very pleased. so pleased, in fact, that i'm also very, very worried that this is merely an illusory excitement...

and hell, i haven't figured out yet if we're playing the game or not. either something very good, or an aneurysm is on its way :P

stretched
a heart stopped
silence, dead
slow, agonizing pressure building up
and holds

an eon passes... and then

an explosion, fiery warmth flooding in
a tidal wave
rolling, slamming against the chamber wall
and the heart beats once again

---
today was a big day: and it began with a lucid dream. i don't remember what was a long and detailed back-story, but i do remember the bit where it suddenly turned into a crazy action movie, from a shoot-out in the street to being surrounded in an old-age home by our attackers.

i needed to wake up at 5.30am (and i'll need to repeat that for the next two weeks), but i forgot to set my second alarm and so woke up with only ten minutes to rub my eyes, shave, dress and exit. the fact that it's possible doesn't make it suck any less.

nystire made a terrifying point today: we really are living out dilbert. it was my turn to talk to the pointy-haired boss today, and i threw a full page essay on the things he does that demotivate me.

to be fair, i really didn't expect his response to be as mature as it seemed. he started off making notes of his responses, and towards the end read my comment on his responses and justifications... this caused him to go back and re-read it from the top. we had a very interesting and positive-sounding discussion afterwards, and as i wrote at the end: i'm certain that nothing good will come of this, but i feel better for having the weight off my chest and i can always hope that some miracle will occur.

a kid in our sister unit got killed in a horrible accident on thursday, so our building was in the dumps today. it was in very poor taste that nystire and i had a laugh at the announcement, printed throughout the site, with dates that made it seem like the guy had been buried a month before he died...

the work i managed to get done today confused me. this bug-hunt i'm doing is extremely challenging.

[i don't know if nystire still reads my blog, but if so then congratulations are in order.]

the train home was nice; i had time to think, and there was a guy juggling in our car and that brought a smile to my face. i went straight to the mall to verify that the wedding gift i've been working on is good, and aside from positive technical confirmation the woman at the store pointed out a couple of "misses" which i'm really grateful for. i tidied those up when i got home, and will have the gift on order by tomorrow :)

but for now... to bed!