how did i do it?

i feel awful, and wasn't feeling good most of today - most of the week, really. i've mentioned that already.

what i'm REALLY not feeling good about is having missed my flight. it's the only thing worse than running to catch a flight - running to discover that it's closed. and the only way to get to my destination involves waiting until tomorrow.

yes, it was entirely my fault. even my mother's insanely brilliant driving through crazy traffic couldn't save me - i thought i was ready and it took twenty minutes instead of two to finally walk out the door.

so i'm beating myself up about it, feeling sick, and now off to a friday night dinner that i was conveniently avoiding.

so much for leaving on a high note.

a positive exit

i've had too much to drink - again. at least this time i saw the girl who went with us from mavericks and didn't do anything i'd regret.

i spent the day resting. in the evening protoplasm arrived to share his music stash, after that my mum and i went to visit my aunt and cousins and share an incredible view.

movie night was great - i haven't had so much fun watching a movie in years! we saw the mutant chronicles, which was cool but bad enough to provide a lot of mst3k amusement :)

i am disappointed that dirk diggler wasn't answering his phone, but hyperviper did make it to the insectified party and i'd been worried that i wouldn't get a chance to say goodbye.

the party was freakin' AWESOME, crazy music and a good crowd - so nice to leave on a high note!

have i come down with something?

yesterday didn't flow so well - i was exhausted. i watched metropolis (gorgeous and interesting!), and completed season 1 of the big bang theory.

my mother has agreed to switch cameras with me - her camera takes higher quality photos, has a microphone and a 4gb memory card. sweet!

dinner was really nice, and quite amusing (specifically shadowslight's mum trying to convince me to marry for money), and the pub in woodstock afterwards with protoplasm and his sister was great even though the subject matter was a bit dark.

his new girl is now an old girl and it's for a similar reason to why i have so much difficulty meeting women in my present situation. you can't get a chance without hiding stuff, and once you've hidden something long-term ceases to be on the cards :S

we went to roots, where the music was great and the crowd not bad at all - but i was much more tired than i thought, remembering that i hadn't been feeling good all day. i'm still not at 100%.

i can't believe i'm leaving tomorrow - the month has flown by... as usual... and i can't believe i'm going to be snowboarding soon!

to be read and passed on
no more unwitting comedian

after-effects

i slept about five hours this morning, which wasn't really enough to cast off the effects of the over-caffeinated sleeplessness... regardless, i did some missioning to pick up a movie, the rest of season 1 of the big bang theory and my upgraded reading glasses.

i was irritated by some guy claiming to be a mugged american, but who spent so much time creating a story and making me guess that i grew quite suspicious (and tired). idiot.

this evening my mum and i had coffee with cousins, and then went to see the tempest. a wonderful production, the acting is great and the costumes exceptional!

(w)rapping up in the dark wood

i've just come back from trapping up the mountain with protoplasm in the dark, which was a beautiful opportunity for some introspection and crap-shooting.

i was very glad to have been vindicated by deer and porcupines (there were a sodding lot of them) when protoplasm thought that i was being paranoid, and the view afforded a wonderful sense of perspective.

we're very small. very, very small. but there are a lot of us. and all we need to do is find a reason to band together and look up to the skies. i think i've mentioned this before, but if all humans could wake up every morning and at least be aware that they had choices then this world would be a much better place.

only fear conquers love, and we let it do so every time.

as bill hicks said, "it's just a ride". i'm perfectly aware that objective reality (or, as objective as we can make out) isn't real and that subjective reality is, but the lie of our limited senses is very difficult to look past.
the meaning that we derive, the story that we tell, is where reality lies*, but even though i know this there's a part of me that is afraid to believe it.

i can see myself as a limb of the planet, as we all are, and i think it's a metaphor that i'm happy with.

other catch-phrases for the night include:

fat people should pay double for airline tickets, and so should midgets because they get so much bloody leg-room

a shirt that says "my birthday was the last time that i touched a vagina" (although i'm sure we're not the only people who've come up with that)

in deference to the usual generic use of the word "self": "and here i'm being very subjective when i use the word 'self'" (no tautology there)

we walked past the memorial to someone nicknamed "NOO", and my first impression was that those were his dying words...

* not intended in the truth sense, and i apologize for the pun

big flat disappointment

i finally got it together and took my nephew up to table mountain today - i haven't been in 25 years - but the cable cars weren't operating due to the high winds.

we settled for breakfast instead.

i watched cloverfield (very cool), and the first disc of the first season of big bang theory (sweet!).

self-assessment

there's a lot of it going on at the moment. my primary concern is that i've had to build so many walls over the years that i have trouble getting close to people. i'm always agitated because i'm isolated - linguistically, culturally, and by my point of view.

in other news:
i love hearing about a cease-fire wherein rockets are still being fired, i love the journalists picking random non-english speakers to share their views, and i especially love the idea of "and this time, we'll all make sure that there's no rearmament". because the egyptians are our friends.

the deepest sleep

i had trouble waking up this morning - again. i was up until about 4am watching top gear (the satellite came right *just* as they launched), and had to get up for breakfast at my sister's.

breakfast was very nice. other than visiting my great aunt, i haven't actually done anything with the rest of the day. i'm just emotionally exhausted and unhappy about leaving, even if it is to france for a week before going back to the grind.

i need to stop worrying and get back to enjoying being here.

yay, ceasefire!

now they can stock up again. wonderful.

i'm annoyed. not only do i not have anything to do on a saturday night, but the satellite failed just for the channel that i was watching. i now can't see top gear's reliable rocket go up in flames :(

in the south, by the blue

things zenstar introduced me to today:
keine lust
rubs the lotion on its skin
he-man

all i had to do today was shake off the freakish dreams, take my mum to camps bay, put petrol in the car (and have the attendant laugh at me because it's not my gti - "so buy one!") and head off to visit moonflake and zenstar for lunch.

and in a wonderful turn of events, my mother made decent non-dairy pizza that didn't catch on fire, bringing closure to a bad joke that k-twang and i will never forget from our childhood.

it appears that i have no plans for a saturday night. suck.

xkcd on converting to metric

the other side of crash 'n burn

i know i shouldn't have giggled when she whispered "i'm fit", and i definitely shouldn't have told her that she'd had too much to drink. i shouldn't have patted her on the head, and then responded to her "that's very patronizing" with "yes, i know".

she really should've bought me that beer, drunk the shooter that i bought for her, and not tried to give me advice about what women expect - all i could think of after that episode was "you're totally, completely, utterly not in my league".

that was the second girl to crash and burn, the first couldn't put together a simple sentence, and i don't know if it's because she was drunk or because she's lacking the capacity on a fundamental level. i don't have the energy to deal with stupid people.

otherwise the electro at fiction was awesome. i'm trying to ignore the final minutes when some guy was closing in on a leg-humping (that really wasn't doing it for me), but in general it was a good vibe. a pity we didn't go through with our original plan, the forest mission's been deferred to what looks to be thursday.

also good.

the day:

• mr price doesn't sell sweaters


• i went to visit my nieces. i haven't seen the younger one's friend in a couple of years and she's now taller than me and really good-looking... *sigh*


• i went through the neighbourhood i grew up in, getting some exercise while taking random photos


• i met up with sweetiepie for lunch: she was late, so more arbitrary photography occurred in the area surrounding wembley square before lunch. lunch was moerse expensive, but very good, and it's always fun to see her.


• i went past call-a-pizza on the way home to buy my own copy of slug - hardwired, joined in the punch-tasting (very good) and went through to pick 'n pay to buy a whole roast chicken and provoke more people with my closer to mario shirt.


• my mom and i tried one last time (okay, two last times) to place the cupboard, but due to a horrific design flaw we've taken it down until professional help can be sought. i'm surprised that the damn thing held up until now


• my mum treated me to sushi at willoughby's. fantastic sushi, i'm a bit sad that i found it so filling but i enjoyed every mouth-watering bite. shite, i'm salivating again!
  we had a good talk, specifically about family stuff and future plans, and laughed a lot at the strange passers-by


• protoplasm and SO picked me up and we went through to fiction.

the dodgiest dive

one of them, at any rate. if you make a mistake and turn right at the entrance to stones in town, you'll experience something special.

aeroplane and i had drinks at camps bay, made the above mistake, played great pool (or at least, highly amusing pool) at stones, and after being dropped off at home and eating i watched the spiderwick chronicles, which is a really sweet movie.

cleaned up

yesterday's news:

i had a haircut, a real one - one that leaves me what can tentatively be called a hairstyle! i kind of like it, actually :)
i makes me look all clean and tidy.

i went shopping, competing with foreign sailors in odd-looking uniforms for the cashier's attention, and then came home to discover the anime channel
^_^

i found a free photography lessons e-book, and spent a short while figuring out how to view it on my pda - not the smoothest solution, but decent enough.

i got stuck in serious traffic on my way to pick up my mum, and we went beyond the boerewors curtain to pay the opthalmologist a visit. while waiting for my mum i read a women's psychology magazine that provides lots of "common sense" advice that makes it a winner.
after my mom it was my turn to cry yellow tears, it turns out that while my left eye's correction isn't very different from my lens, my right is in need of an upgrade.

hospital closure: my niece, who in august gave me quite a turn, has finally had the required operation. we went to visit her and have a good laugh, and she was kind enough to let me use her car until she's better ^_^

we came home for dinner, spent a while planning for the apartment (assuming the sale goes through when i return), and nearly killed ourselves laughing.
literally.
my mother was showing me the locking mechanism for a heavy wooden ceiling cupboard door, and it doesn't work. we both started laughing when we discovered this, so much so that we couldn't focus and the door kept getting heavier and heavier to hold up...

i fetched my cousin and his buddy and we went to julip to meet up with protoplasm and his new girlfriend. after a drink we moved over to the rhino room... let me just state that anastetic and whoever played after him were both viciously psychotic and i'm extremely grateful for that. it was a release i've been seeking for way too long.

i was abandoned by all parties while getting my aerobic exercise sorted out, and about half an hour later managed to wobble off the dancefloor and make my way home. my cousin leaving his copy of slug - hardwired in the car didn't provide relief as that crazy bastard's beats got me even more hoppy.

i do feel sorry for the poor parking attendant, the only coins i had left were R2 and he was most vocal about the injustice done to him.

i suffered from a shower handicap until about 8am, meaning i didn't actually have the physical strength to stand for that long after the excessive workout from the party. in addition to that, cupboard door paranoia runs rife as i realized this morning that it's still not locked properly.

the important news:

the constant lucid dreaming i experienced from the moment i passed out on the couch until i forced myself awake at 11am is a solid indicator (to me) that my inner beast has been awakened. i consider this a personal victory against my uniform overlord.

today:

i paid the dietitian a visit, and it was a most interesting hour. she's come up with a plan that seems quite do-able! and i now know that i'm overweight, but my body fat's approaching "anorexic" - so the muscle-building thing seems to have worked out for me :P

i picked my second mum up from the hospital. once i'd dropped her off at home, i picked up keys from an odd english woman and dropped off my glasses for the correction, then dropped off the keys in milnerton and the reality bites in town, forgot to visit my niece (charming uncle, aren't i?) and came back to sea point to rent a couple of videos, buy fish 'n chips (i was under orders) and watch wall-e.

wonderful movie :)

c-potato minus sunset

i've been going INSANE trying to figure out where i knew him from: and it's freakin' jason mewes! the cast is great, the movie is as creepy a concept as i could imagine.

horrifying. and if you don't believe me, wait until the port-a-potty scene near the end. also, i don't know how i feel about how they tackled the drug issue, some of it was well done and some of it just plain pandering.

instead of meeting up with sweetiepie as planned, i went for a walk with my mum and we ended up at maz for supper - the pictures i took of the sunset are great but they don't do it justice, it was incredible today!

the day itself was spent either on the couch or getting lost in n1 city sorting out the decoder. signage: suck.

i also had a wonderful idea that the problem with the internet could be due to the receiver overheating, but i disproved that too soon :(

i think i like puscifer.

movie day

took another contract to get reality bites, but the tape was screwed so i took kung fu panda and day watch instead. those are fantastic movies, and i actually watched kung fu panda twice so that my mom could see it too!

on the way back from some shopping we went past yet another video store, and they did have reality bites. i've just finished watching, and it's a great film :) [i adore winona ryder]

and i did nothing else today.

the water's fine!

it was a beautiful beach day and the water was so nice it was hard to get out!
i spent the afternoon ogling one of my sister's buddies' woman - too fine an ass not to stare...
the waterline was high so we did some rock climbing and then took many stairs to get to protoplasm's car, so that was the exercise taken care of. we drove to la med for sundowner's and to hear goldfish, who are awesome.

pity there were too many - as protoplasm puts it - jocks. didn't dig the vibe too much.

protoplasm's really excited about the girl from saturday night, and i quoted to him on the way: "love like you've never been burned". the only issue with this girl is that his ex is all pissed off after a sleazy friend of hers alerted her to the new goings-on and we think he deserves a solid thumping.

we went to call-a-pizza, ate great pizza and obtained the best of nagual album - protoplasm has informed me that my copy of shamanarchy went his way when i left the country, so that makes three albums of a group that doesn't produce them anymore. sweet!

no internet, in fact these are the first minutes of access and my mother and i were not impressed yesterday :(
and i can't even use my pda because the wireless is up to shit. suck.

a rough summary

spur with shadowslight (and a sliced toe due to sandal incompetence), neos with my sister, 3 wise men at the baxter with both mommies, and a sweet bar with protoplasm, a buddy of his, too much rum and not enough good-looking women.

an anti-zionist sentiment

the open letter to the world is a nice little reminder of the power of perspective.

in other news, i've overslept.

fabulous!

i know i shouldn't use that word, but that's what comes to mind after seeing as you like it at maynardville - that was an excellent production and great fun to watch!

after posting this morning, i went back to sleep until lunchtime, after which is spent a productive couple of hours on the couch. then i paid my nephew a visit, managing to chide while still remaining the cool uncle, and from there i went to pick up the tickets for the performance.

i was standing in the queue, just before discovering that there weren't tickets to pick up, when my mother phoned me to say i'd forgotten to pick her up from work... oops.

i scrambled, getting there in record time, and after we did some shopping (finding loads of salted liquorice) and having a quick bite to eat, protoplasm arrived and we went through to the theatre. i was introduced to seether on the way, and they're really good.

afterwards we headed to saul's saloon for decent burgers and a ridiculous double thick peanut butter milkshake that was simply too much. now it's time for bed.

i feel that the experience was cleansing after last night's debacle. i'm still a bit twitchy but the world's colours are definitely brighter.

i can ride a bike

awkwardly, but i guess it takes practice. after milling around the old school field - haven't been there since primary school - i stopped by my uncle for a cup of coffee and catty practice (shooting birds with leftovers) and finished watching pearl harbour.

after napping for an hour or so i drove to rick's to meet with the guys, had brilliant fish & chips and allowed myself to be dragged to the godless experience that has me gritting my teeth in anguish.

not charlie's angels

i feel - dirty. i'm horrified on so many levels by last night's... i don't know, i can't think of a suitable description. it was the most sexless and pitiful place i have ever been in, where men go to throw money at girls to see them gyrating joylessly for a couple of minutes at a time.

i am no less revolted by that, and by the constant stream of girls trying desperately to give lap-dances and unsuccessfully small-talk than by my callous misbehaviour with a woman (friend of a friend) which got out of hand after the fifth round of tequila.

let's just say that her shag is not my best mate.

the entire evening brings bile to my throat. i really do feel dirty, and not-participating and knowing in advance what it's all about aren't relieving me of that place's foul, pathetic taint.

empty aggression

empty aggression

Our slack, aching, ape-jawed overlords
bringing forth our great demise
with soldier demons' invasive tongues
Licking dirt that we despise

As we lay on broken backs
staring at the weeping skies
Watching, as if in hazy dream
Minds diseased, too numb to scream
as poison tears form in the Hag's old eyes

Who, then
raises himself up
and staggers to his friend?
And cups his head,
with gentle kiss,
escorting him to his end?

I will stand, on broken leg
and fight as best i can
For i may lose, and share our fate
but will have died for Man

two days down

i love spending so much time fighting to access the internet :/

yesterday's post:

i performed my driving duties this morning, bought razorblades and watched stander - i adore thomas jane and the movie is brilliant!

i've been pondering the whole jip vs andy / dark side vs yoda / the conquest of inner space vs outer space thing, and have come to the conclusion that both sides of the argument are complementary in a male / female sense, and that a balance must be struck.

not so simple.

today's:

okay, i admit defeat - it's been obvious that the angel's not keen but i've been trying anyway :(

i watched a third of pearl harbour (not realizing what a ridiculously long movie it is) and then my sister arrived for coffee.
she's composed an email to the entire family concerning our idiot brother in an attempt to be able to reconnect with them. we share the same problem in confronting him - he's an advocate and way better with arguments than we are.

i picked up my mother from work, we bought my brother's kids gift vouchers at the waterfront, i learned how to use the disc-changer and we arrived at my cousin's place only an hour late.

it wasn't as bad as we expected - my brother's an asshole but he's not a bad guy, and i find it interesting that he's a big fan of dawkins and we actually had a lot of stuff to talk about. it was a bit weird, but nice anyway, to see his ex-wife, and the screwed-up son was careful not to make any bold, stupid statements that he couldn't back away from - which is a vast improvement.

the food was really good. my mother and i left around 10pm, and i dropped her off at home and parked the car outside protoplasm's place - from there we went to roots.

the typical roots experience: not too many people, of those the majority being quite alternative. not last night. last night was packed with kiddies, quite a lot of them underage, and most of them full of shit and bringing with them a bad vibe (not unlike arsim). in fact, some schmuck actually slapped the back of my head as i walked past, but he chilled out when i turned around to deal with him.

their was one very talented young girl who spent an hour or so dancing with us, and i'm a bit disappointed that i didn't register when she was leaving because after we'd managed to establish rapport i would've liked to take her number as well.

at least the music towards the end was solid, a lot of the night the party was very gallery-ish (hard house with trancy overlays - in this case is was good trance but with too much bass) and the only thing missing was tubs of tiger-balm :S

i had to have a cup of coffee in order to drive home, got into bed around 4.30am, and woke up this morning to discover that my mum had left without me. buggrit.

i'm waiting for my brother and cousin to get back to me, we're supposed to be going down to the fields so they can teach me to ride a motorcycle - yay!

comfortably dumb

i went to pick up my mum from work, bought tickets to as you like it, and hopefully didn't mess things up with the angel via sms :S

after dropping my mother at home i went through to caprice for sundowners with sagirl, hyperviper and a couple of other buddies. i've never consumed that much tequila before, i pity the poor well-endowed waitress who had to deal with our rowdiness, and i was fine to drive home but not good to operate a pen.

meditative

wow - even if nothing happens with the angel, today's lunch with her was both entertaining and enlightening! she put me on to james hillman, most of whose ideas are a very neat rendition of the mess that's been sitting in my head for years. i've still got quite a bit of connecting the dots to go, but it's good to know that my sense of direction is alright!

i'm basically depressing the pause button on these thoughts, which is as good a use of a holiday as any :)

it's a pity that he's written so many books that i don't know where to begin.

oh, right - the angel. special girl, that. we had a nice lunch on kloof street, the only problem i have is that things seem to be too comfortable to be going anywhere. safer that way, i guess.

this morning was crap, i don't like malls and i especially don't like milling around them only to discover that noone has what i'm looking for. ipod gear exists, but only for the 4th generation - i'm still relevant, you bastards! - and incredible connection doesn't stock basic wireless receivers.

the paystation chowed a five rand coin, and i had to work to get it back. it took me a while to chill out after that.

yay! thank you blog for keeping me in touch with friends!

in-out-indoor-outdoor

i'm not overly-optimistic about the angel at the moment, but i'm still hopeful o_O

i walked to the other side of sea point to pay one of my second mom's bills, and ran into an old neighbour and i don't think either of us was keen on that happening.
i stopped by a second-hand bookstore, and stopped by the poetry shelf: i walked out with a decent copy of the poems of john milton :)

i walked into the pawn shop, but couldn't bring myself to buy a guitar. maybe another day.
i was disappointed by the chinese shops on the way, none of them stocked white rabbit.
i bought a ten-movie contract at the video-store, and was surprised that they've kept my account active even though i haven't been in there in six years. i rented the bourne identity (nope, hadn't seen it), and watched it eating beef and chicken salomes (rotis?) which were really messy but tasted great.

i burned an emergency rock disc for the drive to pick up my mother - ac/dc, alter bridge and bon jovi - and enjoyed it thoroughly. my mother and i did some quick gift shopping and went to cousins for dinner.

dinner was rowdy, the alcohol flowed freely and some of the conversation topics were decidedly inappropriate, but they're all nice people and the food was alright. i had a problem with the lighting - they used only candles and the contrast was blinding, in addition to the breeze making it a bit too chilly to eat outside.

rant-filled morning

well, i'm at home so i'm guessing the angel's not a happening :S

i've just had a chat with a gq editor, they've re-used an article that was published in the november wired without giving credit to the artist, dropping a section, and switching the points in the last section and attributing it to someone else. that seems mighty suspicious to me.

she said she'd look into it. i have no faith. so far my opinion of the magazine is that it's for assholes.

in other news, i hate telkom. i've always hated them, but even knowing about their internet caps doesn't make it easier to deal with them patiently. setting up dsl in south africa feels like turning around and spreading.

call-a-pizza was awesome last night, as usual. i had the bacon and mushroom, and although my lactose intolerance caused my eyes to stutter (i get really exhausted for a while after consuming dairy), it was well worth it. the accompanying music was to die for :)

we decided to play pool, but stones in sea point has disappeared - not a trace remains of the ballroom, what used to be the hangout of our sea point youth - and the heartache & vine doesn't have a table anymore (although the quality seediness is identical to what i remember).
we ended up in zulas, where the music wasn't completely awful and the atmosphere is always... authentic.

we played pool for over an hour, it cost us R3 and was a whole lot of fun!
that's the incentive for playing properly, and it drives me demented that in israel you're not only being charged by the frikkin' hour, but you don't get to challenge other people: this creates a serious lack of variety and reduces the social element to whoever you walked in with.

my burn seems to have deepened throughout the evening, and i'm really tender down one side of my body. i dropped my mom off at work this morning, taught her how to use bittorrent to download the episode she missed, and have been reduced to spending my morning lying on the couch and sitting online: maybe i'll go do something random.

sun, water, alcohol

it was a quiet night of napping on the couch between episodes of top gear, and it was fun watching it with my mum, both of us laughing hysterically :D

santana - veracruz is such a fun song!

both my mothers and i went shopping this morning, mostly for sweets and cooldrinks, and then my sister picked me up to take me to the beach. i think she's right that i missed a couple of spots with the suncream, because i'm a bit burned in weird patches after spending the whole day in the shade reading fhm.

why is it that an international subscription costs THREE TIMES as much? is that because of postage?!

i bought a gq for comparison, but they don't do international subscriptions, period.

it was a great day on the beach, although i was infuriated when my sister blabbed to one of her friends about my status in the military. for the rest of the day i was under the shadow of all the preconceptions that it entails, and had to fend off all the enthusiastic digging for information that i wouldn't give out even if i had.

freaking information junkies are the reason that the media gets away with their interference. i'm also annoyed because when i'm here i'm a total hippie, and i really don't want anyone mistaking me for a representative of israeli forces.

i met up with hyperviper at la vie, a place i'd never heard that's about 200m down the road from my mother's apartment. we drank too much tequila, but i thoroughly enjoyed the mussels in spite of the terrible service - i don't normally feel okay about not leaving a tip :/

the reason for the drinking: hyperviper just discovered today that noddie, his best friend of about 12 years, was sleeping with his ex before they broke up. he's understandably pissed. and i feel like shit about it even though i'm not the source of information :(

so we talked mostly about that, although eventually we moved on to less relevant and more amusing things, and i'm now back home for a bit before going out with protoplasm.

i've been wondering what i'm going to do about taking the angel out tomorrow.

easy

i was so completely wiped out yesterday that i needed a cup of coffee just to stay awake in the shower before going to bed. after posting this morning my mother and i went to dirk diggler's place to return the car, and from there to the golf course.

now i understand why she asked me not to wear such an offensive shirt (my closer to mario's "i want to fuck <princess peach> like an animal"), because she wanted to introduce me to some of the people there. those elderly ladies found it amusing :)

i drove back, sitting online and putting up pictures until my sister came to pick me up and take me to the beach. we were both standing in the water when some little kid lost control of his wooden skimmer board and a wave threw it straight into her legs, leaving her bruised and bleeding. those are serious waves, parents really shouldn't let their kids in unsupervised.

otherwise, we had a good and loud catch up, there was a lot of talent on the beach, and the day was fantastic :)

my sister dropped me off at my nieces' pad - they're living together in an absolutely gorgeous apartment, huge and styling and with a communal pool. opulent - that's the word.

i drove us to camps bay for sundowners, and in addition to it being really picturesque we had drinks and tapas and a good chat. having never consumed tapas before, i believed it to be fingerfood. tapas is a dip.

my older niece really drives me nuts, she's a litterbug :(

i dropped her off at a bar named after a beer i don't particularly like, and then dropped myself off at home after going in the wrong direction because my younger niece and i were enthusiastically discussing music. i find it incredible that she's somehow developed great taste in it!

now i've had a shower, and am chilling until the next person calls me with plans.

2009 begins!

that was by far the most incredible and fantastic new year's i have ever experienced!

dirk diggler arrived to pick me up, gave me a quick run-through of his car, a beat-up citi golf sans power-steering or automatic gears that actually allows one to drive his vehicle: sweet!

we had drinks with noddie and a couple of his friends, and now that i've seen who noddie's dating i understand why he's not quite comfortable seeing hyperviper - one really shouldn't date one's best friend's ex. especially not immediately after him...

i dropped dirk diggler at his girlfriend's place, and began the journey to the vortex.

i broke camp and left yesterday at around 2.30pm, and now that i've slept 13 hours i find it absolutely amazing that i managed the drive back without incident. i was exhausted and hurting, and can now appreciate just how badly i've mistreated my poor muscles with my antics ^_^

although i must say that i'm well impressed that i only got slightly sunburned - i used cream and was very particular about being in the shade as much as possible.

two bags of jelly tots, and i still caught myself falling asleep at the wheel - i'm very lucky that i registered what was happening and managed to sort myself out quickly.

----

i will no longer consider alternatives to the vortex.

i'm going to begin my description with a revelation that i had on the first day: contrary to how it feels on the outside, the vortex is the real world and everything else is just a dream.

these people arrive from all walks of life, and are free to drop their assumed external personas and just enjoy themselves. it is a place where being happy is okay, and thinking about others is cool - where the concept of "brotherhood of man" actually makes sense and doesn't need to be attacked with cynicism.

i spent the first night wearing my mask. most people thought it was great, some people had a good laugh and a couple were frightened... whenever someone asked me why i was wearing the mask i had to explain that i wasn't.
i wear a mask 24 hours a day for most of the year, and it's only when i come to that kind of environment that i can really take it off.

as i passed a tent on my way to the dancefloor on the second evening, i overheard some girl saying: "jesus, that's the craziest looking guy on the dancefloor" - that made me smile :)
the truth is that i don't need drugs to get into exactly the same frame of mind and feel the music - obviously not as intensely, but close - and just let my body go as the music dictates. the only difficulty is that the energy that i'm using is my own so i get worn out a bit more easily.

from the first evening i managed to develop a slight chafe, which got progressively worse throughout the festival. funnily enough, it didn't affect my dancing / stomping / digging, only my walking, so by the end i was awkwardly trying to dance my way from place to place even when there wasn't a beat to assist me :P
public service announcement: using anthisan cream burned a lot, but although it doesn't specify any use relating to chafing i woke up this morning in an unbelievably better state!

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i managed to sneak my car into a sweet space very close to the main stage, parking next to a bunch of sweet guys with their heads in the clouds and their feet on the ground.

it bothers me that so many people came in with glass bottles in spite of the specific request on the invitations and the check at the entrance. and if you are going to bring in glass anyway, and you accidentally drop a bottle on the floor, then even if you're completely wasted you should pick up the shards or move them to the side of the path, because most people are milling around barefoot.

hyperviper and his buddies only arrived about an hour and a half later, it was great spending so much time with them and a real pity that hyperviper himself just isn't into trance :(

i cannot even count the number of old friends i ran into the last couple of days - it was absolutely wonderful to see so many faces from the end of the 90's (and, fantastically enough, to remember their names), and it turned the festival into another sort of a reunion :P

i spent most of my time dancing, very little of it near the tent, and the rest of it chilling at the coffee tent. hyperviper's friend and the guys who ran the stall are practically family, so we all became fast friends :)

including a very serious straight-laced dude, who almost immediately asked me: "bru, are you a military man? i have a sense for these things". the angel also picked that up fast, in spite of everyone else assuming that i was just another half-crazed and high hippie... interesting.

a few hours before midnight i caught up with tgtbt's little brother, and we had the longest conversation we've ever had the opportunity to have. i'm really glad for the opportunity for the other half of the discussion that i had with his mother the evening before!

the crossover to new year's was nuts, as usual. the main stage was simply too packed to move! the first ten minutes of 2009 were spent jumping up and down crazily and being covered in j.c. le roux :P

i finally went to sleep around 3.30am in order to have enough energy to do the wake-up set. it's a pity i was too tired by that stage to set up my tent, because when i put it up in the morning it only took about five minutes and i would've slept SO much better than in the car :S

[and in case you're wondering, i hadn't put it up yet because until it was dark i didn't know that i'd picked the right place - every year i end up having to move]

after a quick swim in the dam, and some bouncing around to dry, i had another hour's nap - four hours' of sleep is a lot for a vortex :)

then the native american came out for some serious stomping, replete with orange and black laces for my arms. they were great except that every half an hour or so i needed to retie them. those were removed by a couple of sweet girls on my way out, i hope they got good use :)

i finally introduced myself to the angel from the easter vortex. she's absolutely gorgeous, and embodies so much awesome that i immediately regretted meeting someone that interesting that i won't be able to see. she's not even living in cape town anymore, so we basically have a week together if things do work out :S

the chill-out floor, after a full day of horribly bad breakbeat - annoying everyone back to the main stage every time - had become the place to be, with good groovy tunes and a great game involving a giant ball and lots of players. and me, the hero of the day, the only one able to retrieve the ball from the netting above with well-aimed throws of the waterbottle :)

i slept about two and a half hours before waking up 3am freezing - i was so cold that i was shivering and chattering to the dancefloor and it took me about ten minutes to warm up enough to mission for coffee, i was terrified that i was going to be sick.

i had peanut buttered chicken for breakfast, and then went to the israeli stall for coffee and to be be introduced to the jewish contingent - it was a great way to wake up :)

the sun rose on a beautiful set, dancing with tgtbt, the watermelon man and the guys from call-a-pizza.
i woke protoplasm up for a repeat breakfast at the israeli stall, and we took over the field to play frisbee. a puppy (i can't tell the difference between pit-bull and staffie puppies) decided to join us, and hilarity ensued as we just couldn't display the tenacity she did. at some point i realized that she'd been working way too hard, and i had to trick her into going to the bar to get some water.

the angel returned toward the end of play, and i joined her on the dancefloor until it was time to chill again.
on the way to the dam i suggested to tgtbt's brother that he join us, but it took him and his buddies so long to get organized that i saw them on my way back :P
up there i said goodbye to the neighbours, laughed at the girls who were shocked by some guy skinny-dipping, was impressed by farmhands taking cues from the trippers, and enjoyed a few minutes cooling off in the stunning water.
i missed the path on my way back, and picked up a fellow traveller in the form of a giant bulldog bitch. i walked with her for a couple of hundred painful metres before realizing my mistake, and she escorted me back to the path.

the end of shift's set was inspiring, and had me drawing on energy that i hadn't been aware that i still had! the angel went off to get something, i went for another bacon & egg burger, and she came to find me to say goodbye.

it drizzled a bit while i ate, and i quickly made my way back to the main stage in the hopes of digging in some mud. for the next couple of hours there were hints of rain, and all of us praying for more - one girl with a giant inflatable shark was sitting on it in the hopes that "noah's shark" would keep her safe :)

there's a gorgeous, and extremely tall black woman who i see at all the parties, but this is the first time we actually communicated - i think she noticed that i'd taken a photo of her. ooh! that reminds me, hyperviper missed his calling in life. he used to be a model photographer, but what he's even better at is voyeurism - he caught so much unsuspecting talent on my camera that i was surprised when i went through the photos :P

it eventually did rain, allowing us a solid mud stomp, and i was joined there by aeroplane's ex, another person i haven't seen in absolute ages, and whose pure joy brought the most ridiculous smile to my face ^_^

and then it was time to go.