reflections upon aging prematurely - part i

[post divided retroactively]

today is saturday. we left for the doof festival last thursday, and this is the first real opportunity i've had to post. and i still have a ton of actual work to get through, a book to read and two papers to write...

my sister called me a masochist yesterday, but while i'm seriously stressed i'm still actually *enjoying* what i'm doing, so i'm sure i'm not. here's a relatively brief summary of what feels like an aeon gone by:

---thursday: travelling

it took us much longer to finish packing than i expected, and i've been informed by pg that this is normal for her so next time: we'll pack the night before :P

to make matters worse, we forgot something important at home and only realized it when we'd finally gotten to rishpon, so we turned around and came back for it... the traffic density in both directions was high, but at least on the way back north we had some music - something else i'd forgotten to pack :P

the kosher-for-passover cookies i bought before we hit the traffic jam after afula were great: marvellously morish, they kept me going for the first two days of the festival :D
we stopped by my cousin's kibbutz for a delightful couple of hours, and left fairly late. we stopped to pick up coffee around 22.55, and this is important because that meant we were *just* in time to purchase araq before sales curfew. one shouldn't arrive at a festival without alcohol, that's just not cricket!

what a difference, being the driver. last year got me so used to stressing about hitching, bussing, and walking... this was a pleasure.

---the festival. d-d-d-d-d-d-DOOF. four days of mayhem. and, all told, about five hours of sleep - the double mattress had a hole in it so resting time was rocky and at awkward angles. we got there the night before and set up without any hassles, except for my own personal awkwardness. on the first morning - which was a bit rainy - pg and i ran around sorting out the sign posting once the police pre-inspection was underway; on friday afternoon, with ten minutes to go until my eight-hour shift as a parking attendant, i wrote out my villanelle on the graffiti wall and then headed out to the trenches.

being a parking attendant in israel is an experience. some of the people were okay, but the vast majority required individual explanations (and we're talking about a *lot* of people) as to why they couldn't park wherever they liked: i felt like a kindergarten teacher half the time. and every time one person gave me shit they distracted me from another two or three who were doing something just as bad or worse.

at some point, i found myself being attacked (verbally) by an ars who was explaining to me why someone "with a job like mine" shouldn't be trying so hard or thinking too much. i don't know why i didn't inform him that i was a volunteer. the thing that bothered me more than his aggressive tone was his racism. i've mentioned before how unimpressed i am by the vilifying of civilization, and this asshole didn't stop calling me "ashkenazi" in the pejorative. when i responded in a way that i hoped would make him realize his stupidity, he continued by slurring his own friend for being of yemenite background. his behaviour was so aggressive that i felt uncomfortable with pg having rocked up at that very moment, because i was terrified that he'd associate us and have a go at her too...

the sad / amusing thing was seeing that same asshole two days later on the dancefloor, obviously extremely high and standing amongst the crowd looking sage and mystical. much like with chc, i often wonder what happens to the stupid / narrow-minded on lsd. i hope i never find out.

to offset the unpleasant people, there were a couple of nice ones and a lot of smiles and waves. i was particularly grateful to the woman whose partner parked in *exactly* the wrong spot while he went to pick up tickets, but made a point of helping me out and before they moved brought me a vodka redbull in a cup and a can of redbull for the rest of my shift. i saved that for another day :)

once the main parking lot was full we were all sent down to maximise the use of the lower one. hours of planning and coercing people to park considerately was edifying; it's incredible how much space you have when people don't leave half-car lengths between them and manage to park parallel to one another :P

i haven't seen dp's nephew in a year, and seeing his dreads was inspiring. i now know that i should be ready to have a go by this time next year :D

notable sets prior to sunday: sensual squeak, dirty saffie

i once again thank india for teaching me how to comfortably use public facilities.

i got a fair amount of reading done in the first couple of days; in retrospect i should have been reading something study-related, but i was on holiday and survival of the sickest is amazing!

there weren't a lot of options as far as food and drinks were concerned, but the selection wasn't bad and pg and i had backstage passes so we ate really well a couple of times.

i was amused to meet a couple of the people on the dancefloor who are staying in my apartment. apparently, my pad can handle four european girls simultaneously, and has surprised them by exceeding their expectations ^_^

on the second evening i'd had far too much to drink, and had difficulty with basic motor skills. that was also when my left arm really began to act up. i'm experiencing pain on either side of my elbow, and it takes me back to what i suspect was the original cause.

sunday morning was *cold*. and i became absolutely convinced that the chemical toilets were much cleaner and simpler to use than the "real" ones which were constantly backed up.

azax syndrome is always a good start; i wasn't too sure about the paganka people though...

and then the fun began. at 2pm i missioned to the dirty beach, entering the water only to walk out soon afterwards because i wasn't comfortable with its lack of cleanliness...

the paganka stage was rocking. i met up with some friends who introduced me to friends of theirs... a couple of dodgy-seeming folk who introduced me to *their* friends... but the floor was anything but dodgy. it was beautiful. the music was mind-blowing, the smiling craziness all around, the perfect sunset through the haze of the sprinklers and mud splashing...

ears, eyes and feet
in this maelstrom of paradise
fantasy turned reality becomes
illusion

a now
forever
all of the nows
and this now,
forever
becomes the reality, is the reality
for it's more real
than the
figment of fantasy
than those outside our
cabal of communication

our whirlpools of discourse
swirling in droplets of rainbow pleasure
drizzling over our
prehistoric
primeval
sunset

[continued...]