Friday, February 20, 2009

"pay the man who cuts your breast"

that graffiti was scrawled over an advertisement for turkey, but in hebrew it also means "pay your plastic surgeon" :P

thursday:

the quote of the morning: "we ALWAYS have change"
... except for YOU. i started my day with an appointment to view blueprints. what do i know about blueprints? the assistant there assured me that they'd given me everything i needed for the assessor. i went to pay (NIS 4), and only had a 100 on me. the woman sent me upstairs to the cafeteria to get change, and arrived there just after i joined the queue to pick up her coffee. when she asked (on my behalf) if there was change, the above quote was the response.

when it got to my turn, the ex-russian lady took one look at me and said "no, i don't have change for you". everyone climbed in to the fray, the woman in front of me tried to start a "save the soldier" fund by pressing a shekel onto the folder i was carrying, the cute girl stirring her coffee offered to let me use her photocopy machine (the first woman shouted "no! it has to be done in our office!", and eventually i had to buy a croissant in order to break the note.

what a cow!

i *just* missed the bus, which complicated the route although i managed to arrive in herzeliya at around the same time. the bank experience was painless, but the continued travel back to tel aviv was tiring and involved a really dodgy kiosk that managed to sell me bottled water with floating things in it.

i had my favourite shinto breakfast for lunch, but it started tasting funny after a while and i suspect that that's due to me developing a slight cold.

i arrived on base while the rest of my unit was being carded (as i was on wednesday). the hallway contains a number of holographic photos, and as i squinted someone from my section walked past and yelled "it's a sailboat!". then we all got silly.

i got an unintelligible call on my satellite phone:
"you remember?"
"what?"
"do you remember about tonight?"
"what?"
"the blockade"
"what blockade? i don't know about any blockade"
"the blockade! don't you remember? you're closing the weekend!"
"did i get an email? why don't i know about this?"
"you're the NCO in charge of the blockade in [some random place] for this weekend!"
"ooooooh! do you know who you've called?"
"who have i called?"
i tell her.
"ooooooh! shit. sorry! bye."

peanut butter & marshmallows: a few weeks ago i bought marshmallows for the weekly unit meeting, but i couldn't get hold of smooth peanut butter so nobody else knew why. it's now become a trend, only the organizer's don't know why either... good thing i had skippy on hand, so we could set up a small chain to pass the improved marshmallows to our incredulous co-workers :)

we suffered a serious dust storm yesterday. makes for uncomfortable breathing and irritated eyes. i'm still blocked up :(

i've been having trouble with the assessor. i faxed him all the papers - and that's a lot of papers (8 minutes 51 seconds) - and he called me back to tell me that i'm missing a number of things and that he can't help me until i've sorted them out. which means making another appointment and i'm still not qualified to pick the right documents. he's a really mean dude and seemed to be making up words (he wanted what sounds like the russian word for accordian).

i called up my lawyer, who said he was just being difficult, and then i called the mortgage bank who gave me a recommendation for a really nice guy: he was really pleasant to talk to but he hasn't gotten back to me yet. i'm on a deadline, people! this process can't take this long!

your sex is on fire was stuck in my head for hours yesterday.

i finished shopping fairly quickly when i got home, and went to pay the agent - i got a kiss on each cheek and a cup of coffee for my troubles, i'd forgotten that i hadn't visited since before the signing. i've now paid the piper, now we'll see how great he is post-transaction :P

i spoke to SxS on skype while hunting wildly for the cheque my mom's friend gave me to cash... madness and frustration and i became convinced that it had somehow slipped into the suitcase that i threw out when i returned from my holiday. eventually i found it in an obscure pocket of my jacket. *snarls*

the kid arrived, we walked to yogo (the frozen-yoghurt bar) via the new apartment, where i examined the patio again and realized that while the burglar bars are intact, the roof isn't impregnable and in theory it's possible to rip through it. unlikely as hell, but i'm going to deal with it because i'm paranoid.

we went with piles' brother (they share a self-justification attitude) to the club, where we celebrated the release of one of the girls from our old team by suffering from all the smoke and talking shite. the background music was mostly pleasant, but i was way too tired to enjoy myself (most of the evening was focused on keeping my eyes open).

this morning:

dream theatre ticket: acquired.
[apparently they've been selling like hot-cakes! i'm really pleased.]

[the assessor *JUST* called, i've spoken to the seller and the agent, and we're all meeting today! SWEET!! (convenient ^_^)]

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