my worst nightmare

i can't believe it got worse. i can't remember anything worse than the experience i had trying to sleep last night. i've spent a few days unable to eat, sleep, or breathe comfortably, and the chills and the hot flushes, feinting this morning and once again going in the wrong direction to get to the clinic (in reverse, this time) just made it all worse.

i've got another couple of days off, i really hope that's enough.

yesterday afternoon was relatively alright, though - i spent it canning myself while watching flight of the concordes, a stunning series and i'm disappointed that i'm through the entire season already.

last night, just before getting up and turning off the music, i had a dream reminiscent of tool - rosetta stoned, only i keep a pen and paper handy.

the only thing wrong with humans is that they persist in their attempts to define general rules and moral codes for things that simply cannot be governed by them - specifically themselves.

the more people believe these rules and codes to be correct the less human they become.