Monday, February 29, 2016

the last week at work

sunday 21st:

super busy afternoon with a full apartment and mr smear getting lots of attention from new people, small victories and a shopping trip, mom chat then aristocats followed by feeding and putting mr smear to bed, then struggling to eat stealthily

monday 22nd:

i wish i could record my dreams...

a relatively good night followed by an ugly morning

feeling concussed when it was mr smear who fell over hard (he does that quite a lot, it's very unnerving), receiving a mediocre job offer but an offer nonetheless, getting good work done, successfully "letting go" when a dev decided we were wasting time "talking" all the time (designing and planning)

leaving work early, a busy mr smear entertaining my mom while she helped me with the salary negotiation, an evening playing with mr smear or being fascinated by the dragon's den while eating dinner

the pokemon theme song stuck in my head for the second day in a row

tuesday 23rd:

a decent night with lots of forgotten dreams

post-bath scream: apparently (with me, at least) mr smear would rather not be wrapped in his towels

a pretty good day at work, if a little pressured... the test for the job coming in handy at my (now) old job...

... accepting the revised job offer! even though it's not as much as i'd like, it's a good place to get started so i'm excited and relieved and they've been really cool with me since then

gd preparing a big celebratory dinner, getting chores out the way while managing a particularly feisty little boy, putting him to bed at nap time and being surprised by his actually sleeping

the weirdness of the idea that i have an interesting job waiting for me, where the pay's not bad and the atmosphere seems relaxed and i'll be getting another macbook pro (although better purposed this time, it's much better suited to web development than to cross-platform development)

the apartment: putting prices on things is weird

wednesday 24th:

a midnight feed (oh, no! he's going to turn into a gremlin!), not an easy night but not too bad either, an odd apartment proposal that would totally sort us out and my mom looking at places for us, saying "aunty gd" to my nephew amusing me endlessly

nice weather, the only reason to put the hood up being to avoid snow melting in my clothing

figuring out some cool stuff in laravel in spite of their half-assed (but pretty!) documentation, a good lunch at aux vivres with my manager, the satisfaction of a job elegantly done turning sour as i struggled to merge something i'm proud of into a brand new repo that's already been corrupted by nem and his team's never having learned how routing works; spending a few minutes introducing one of them to the concept and then rushing home late to meet a potential tenant who arrived earlier than expected without the landlord in the pouring, freezing rain

coming in from taking out the garbage to find mr smear crawling! and then sitting up by himself! *super proud dad*

the disturbing realization that we bought the wrong luggage, trying hard to stay relaxed even though i know that we've handled all the really important stuff

thursday 25th:

up for at least five minutes every half hour from 4am

mr smear's crawling was not a fluke! cancelled prescriptions and almost accidentally cancelling gd's phone too early and good company news and finally arranging the right insurance form and getting my feet wet returning the luggage

an unsuccessful hunt for the right luggage, picking up copper branch, lunch, playing with mr smear, gulping down coffee, buying onesies and hitting walmart for their last large duffle bag and baby food

the grocery mission, accidentally missing my final meeting, forgetting to call an illustrator

selling and packing, feeding and showering and doing laundry and eating and feeling rather pleased with everything

friday 26th:

another tough night, this time giving up early and letting him sleep on his belly while i arranged material for the new illustrator; an interesting discussion about fidelity brought on by an offer for beauty products, the dress clothes' triage

mr smear doing interesting yoga moves and mimicking his parents for the first time

my last presentation, a surprising and interesting pushap lunch with vfmp, saying goodbye with some surprising emotional moments, packing up and heading home with some surprising finds from my desk


a relatively quiet and easy evening


another difficult 5am, this time desperate enough to put mr smear on his belly after which everything was fine.

selling stuff day. gd's friend coming over to help her triage, finding some of gd's childhood photos, gd's friend's father coming to buy our air conditioner and give shipping advice, finally (four days before we leave!) putting a bunch of stuff up for sale online, showing the apartment to a couple of people and then learning that our landlord doesn't intend to hold us to our lease (amazing!) so now we're actually hoping that he doesn't find anyone immediately because he doesn't mind us staying for two extra days if nobody needs to move in which would make our lives *immensely* easier

selling the television and getting an offer for the projector and feeling the stress melting away little by little

for something both fascinating and distressing, it's a surprisingly inspirational documentary. i think they have the right attitude


a better night after giving up quicker, a busy morning with lots of visitors, general exhaustion, scanning and selling, whirlwind afternoon with some surprise visits and a huge relief from some old training partners and nox, a quick bath and a quick, cold run to the supermarket (where they made sure to remind me not to miss them), then slowly winding down the day.

today's experience has left us feeling like we're doing alright with this parenting thing. *knocks on wood*


as our apartment empties out, our relocation is becoming very real. and through all the exhaustion, the restlessness, the little but important conerns... we are very grateful.

Saturday, February 27, 2016

alert signal

an important TED talk on wireless technologies

i've been *not* worrying about this stuff for a long time, but he makes a few excellent points: not least of which being the accumulation of signals we're being exposed to over time.
i'm now convinced that we won't be going wireless in our next apartment. and that i need a tool like so that our phones will simply check for messages at intervals instead of searching constantly. that's certainly not a perfect solution, hopefully one will present itself...

Sunday, February 21, 2016

february fly-by

so... in just over a week we're relocating to south africa. this coming week is my last week at work, after which (when we land) i'm going to be doing my best to either land some contract work or just get a job. i just gave up on the new, exciting illustrator, who i believe is the third or fourth to begin working on a paid job and then simply stop communicating (is this an illustrator thing?).

we have packing to do and selling to do and storing to do and transferring our lease to do.

and then 30+ hours of travelling to do.

no pressure.

monday 1st:

there's nothing like being kept up at night by the feeling that you're not parenting right.

a disturbingly delightful spring morning instead of february weather

an anxious morning, a pleasant welcome back to work

one fun job, one non-starter
finishing limbo - a disappointing ending to a phenomenal game, but at least it's got great replay value

a walmart run on the way home, enjoying a jolly family evening, an impressive feeding, an exciting (over-exciting, gd had to call "time!") play session and a highly amusing set of sleepy sounds wherein mr smear demonstrated the amusing new additions to his vocalizations

tuesday 2nd:

nightmare rls from the waist down for hours of extreme discomfort
family conjunctivitis (or so we thought), gd in more pain

wasted hours trying to ssh into a vagrant box, eventually giving up so that i could investigate something broken and learn that the new, "clean" setup we've just begun porting to has already been corrupted by the chief troublemaker

lunchtime cs:go and thomas was alone

coming home to another positive call with the illustrator, a very loud mr smear practicing interesting sounds, an impressive feeding and a solid demonstration of his mobility

wednesday 3rd:

a better night, but not a good night, with a relaxed morning

freezing rain just as the ice began to clear

two tall, skinny black kids bumping into me as they ran out of the dep with a couple of bottles of alcohol, one with a beige tuque and blue scarf; i'm embarrassed to admit that it took me a full minute to decide that they might've just stolen them...

... and of course, my boots have sprung a leak...

a day of distractions (playing with continuous testing), finishing with some laravel plugin frustration and eventually realizing that just doing things myself (in that specific context) is much easier

skype fails with my mom, double dinner and garbage day ending with a bite on my foot and is-the-insect-still-there paranoia

thursday 4th:

by 1am it felt like a long night already, and we were woken by his cries at regular intervals afterwards. gd was convinced it was teething pain (his new tooth is *sharp*), but i think it was either bad dreams or just general discomfort...

struggling out of bed for an unnecessary diaper change (i think he farted just as i was checking), a chilled morning with some apparently good news

reading shitty laravel documentation until i felt my brain was bleeding out of my ears, but eventually getting a fix on the direction i need to take

a rush home to pick up mr smear and meet gd at the clinic, then a rush home and a wait which forced a rush to work for half an hour before rushing to my weekly meeting

the problem with analog timers is that they work even when the machine they're supposed to activate isn't plugged in. i thought i'd timed my toasted muffin perfectly for the veggie burgers but after i heard the *ding* i pulled it out cold

late for the meeting after a metro slowdown, some intriguing insights

a really nice family evening (although mr smear really should've been in bed an hour or so earlier)

friday 5th:

an amazing, refreshing two solid blocks of sleep, but waking up from a bad angle with a sore neck and back.

hunting down and killing a creepy spider inspiring an amusing introduction to parktown prawns for gd (and she'd just been watching die antwoord - fatty boom boom, too)

the godmother last chance debate

wasting some more time, then giving the laravel approach another chance (a third ldap package): this one mostly works, but i had to fork the repo and make an important fix* and spend ages defending it to the owner who was trying to coerce me into writing all his tests for him...

* php's ldap functions don't work as specified. some developers write simple wrappers to correct the behaviour, but most just pass it on to the user which is offensively pathetic

a walmart / oshkosh mission after lunch, mind blowing thomas was alone puzzles and an insanely large quantity of delicious cocoa halva, seriously arguing about cashew nuts with a coworker

leaving late, missing a train and the next one delayed, kids singing and some miserable git yelling at them to shut up but the parents chiming in in response

digging holes in what could've been a relaxing friday evening

saturday 6th:

ups and downs

the godmother incident

the shopping mission (hurting shoulders)

six months to the day!!! and his first real adult poop (actually his second, but my first experience)

running out of time to watch the martian - 48 hours is never enough

sunday 7th:

easy like gd's birthday morning, minus a bad-news haircut
a kind-of-a-nap but i was still exhausted and restless and wondering if i was sick or over-tired or deficient in something

finally seeing the imitation game and rewatching a completely forgotten unbreakable

heavy awkward cumbersome donation bags, dodgy bastards lurking in front of the pharmacy forcing me to ask if i could enter

the second nail filing incident in which i was much braver than before (but still struggling)

evil apples with gd until bedtime

monday 8th:

some decent sleep and some weird dream fragments
no breakfast and metro rush hour with a child and an inordinate amount of time waiting for a signature after a blazingly quick x-ray

the good doctor's appointment (especially after the radiologist failed to do the one thing he was called for, stamp the damned report), a short visit to subway followed by a highly stressed afternoon

the one piece games on sale, booking toronto (holy crap this ordeal is expensive), discovering that i'm fully back in debt after finally approaching zero

tuesday 9th:

a long, sleepless night (post-vaccination), duct-taping the balcony door to keep the cold out, early out of bed for a really good interview

catching up and strategizing with dirk diggler, mr smear taking more than one step forward!

a little one piece, a quick lunch and verification that mr smear was experiencing his first fever

being aroused from a nap to report a death threat to the FBI from a lady gaga fan who got pissed off by a comment from my wife - no more unconsidered commenting in public forums for her :P

papers panic while mr smear struggled, the printing rush and speeding over to the notary

the cashier at iga made sure to smear her slimy cold virus on each and every one of the products i purchased


i use my healthy diet as an excuse to shamelessly consume junk food with no consequences... i regret nothing!

except the home fries. i knew i shouldn't have bought them, and i got halfway through before i felt like i'd made a big mistake.

every time...


mr smear's fever breaking

wednesday 10th:

bad timing for a team transfer request, although it was very flattering
a mostly decent night
a highly stressed last-minute morning, leaving early (what we thought was early) and almost missing the final call, our first times with the new car seat quite successful

a pretty good train ride (practice run for the airplane), mr smear getting along nicely with other kids, two major dis-ass-ters (two soiled onesies) on the train, a smooth welcome to toronto, quick and easy passport photos, being joined by supertongue for high speed shopping and rushed gobbling while trying to play big catch-up with very little time

a super-tired hyper-active mr smear who seemed to have advanced a step overnight but appeared to need to make up for missed playtime after his bedtime

discovering a severe google maps fail when printing the last documents; i guess if i hadn't forgotten those documents we would've found out too late that we were a twenty minute drive away from our destination and not a five minute walk... our night in toronto would probably have been significantly cheaper, too...

thursday 11th:

so no, a playpen and a crib are not the same thing and a floor-height crib is impossible to use to put small children to sleep (not to mention dangerous for parents' backs)

sleeping in the fridge: an unsealed window in canada in winter???

3am losing my shit and organizing a properly heated room that we wouldn't move to because it was too much work, drunk fucks leaning on me in the elevator generating a massive level of rage that could've turned into an evening with the police but instead just saw me shoving my way out and seething and losing a bit more sleep unnecessarily after i finally came up with a solution that involved mr smear sleeping on the bed and myself on the couch so i could add bad angles for my neck and back to the equation

starbucks rush, hurried packing and a call from my toronto cousin combining with gd noticing a subtle photo issue sending us on a mission to the mall before we could checkout and grab a taxi and leaving for the consulate almost an hour after we were supposed to have arrived

if we hadn't had an incomplete application, we might've been rejected immediately because it took two sadistically bureaucratic scenes before our overlord was reprimanded for inappropriate cruelty by her superior. swimming in my own consciousness, all three of us exhausted to the point of dysfunction and having to jump to a notary at 11.30am to deal with a secretary who confused the instructions multiple times but was good enough to let me print statements from her pc, finally returning at 12.15 to fill out tough forms under the gun when the consulate shuts down at 12.30; not quite making it but being rescued and pulling through to a very fair compromise on the consulate's part - giving us a few more days to fix our files and not forcing us to return to toronto.

it was horrifying to think of how much money we'd had to sink into this endeavour and how all of it and our future was riding on a bunch of unfeeling forms and number crunchers.

walking out with a large collection of discarded expensive documents feeling a mixture of shock and relief and dread; having to hurry to get to the train station and find a place to sit and eat and rest (there isn't one, of course), more hours waiting for the train

another lucky train break (four seats available! score!) but feet too smelly from two days in boots to even partially relax and unwind on the way home
parenting advice to the rail guy

getting home to a freezing apartment

friday 12th:

a solid night's sleep for all but waking up on the verge of collapse; chatting with mom, messaging godmother for her birthday, bathing mr smear and being absolutely amazed at how much he's advanced in a matter of days, alternating between playing with him and playing some more one piece, just getting through the day trying (and failing) to rest and doing a shopping run and then taking forever to get everyone to sleep

surrealist bon appetit to the aids guy

saturday 13th:

it felt like mr smear put on five pounds during the night, a couple of short wakings and getting up in the morning still wiped out and with a test ahead of me

ice walk at -32
blueberry skinning fail

a long day setting up my home dev environment and digging in to laravel

me and my big mouth while listing priorities

mr smear having a decent day but it appeared that he had a cold and since toronto it's been unclear whether his cries are actual cries or just him practicing...

circumcision adherence correction and planning a clinic visit just in case

sunday 14th:

a difficult, sleepless night, outside at -35 for wet wipes that won't mess with mr smear's skin, making progress on the test but finding it tricky, insoles for my boots, a freezing cold clinic run

gathering documents, working late into the night

monday 15th:

passing the point of hallucination, running out of onesies at 4am, the opposite of what we meant, not being able to sleep and getting up to finish the test and wrap it in a bow and pray that it satisfies

gd and i both extremely nervous for the big day, forcing myself to swallow each bite of my breakfast

hand nerve pain

the big announcement being followed by a series of smaller, more awkward announcements, receiving a surprising amount of support and an open offer to return to work whenever i'm ready

pushing comixology

a pointless lunch run to buy clothing for mr smear but apparently buttons on pajamas aren't fashionable for children over six months

making magic with node.js, having an old mexican friend visit for a beer and a great chat, gd feeling awful after a long day of being screamed at by our son who's either very irritable lately or is exercising his ability to produce highly ambiguous noises. some of them are cute or funny, some of them scary

clearing up miscommunications, going to bed late but relatively early

tuesday 16th:

a better night, up at 6am to send important emails and make calls and successfully avoid discussing money with a potential employer

rushing to the supermarket for emergency stock, overheating on the way home at 4 below, stressing non-stop about the scheduled consulate call

fun with command line node.js, not being able to contact the consulate and last-chance emailing potentially problematic statements, just getting back into work mode before receiving an email informing me that gd and phoenix's visas are in the mail, that we aren't going to have to return to canada in the coming months, that the incredible investment in the toronto visit paid off, that our highest priorities are in order and we can now focus on the insane task of selling and storing and packing and leaving over the course of the next two weeks

a pleasant evening's work

a quick, quiet evening (though mr smear's stuffy nose kept him up for a while), finally announcing publicly that we're moving to south africa

wednesday 17th:

very little sleep, getting up early, a slow day at work, giving the pharmacist the wrong medical insurance card

thursday 18th:

2, 4, 6am and no more sleep
a mostly uneventful day in the office getting shit done the right way; leaving on a positive note after a solid cleanup session. pushap for lunch (heavy, delicious), not picking up $200 lying in a puddle

friday 19th:

3.30am mysterious awakening, a restless couple of hours and getting up at 6am again

playtime, breakfast, psychometric evaluation, post-evaluation stress, the hospital run that failed because the department only opens at 1.30pm for a couple of hours each day

the shopping mission: from no wind to utterly freezing in five seconds flat

taking pride in being the parent who can change the diaper without gagging

dinner and passing out as soon as mr smear did for his nap

saturday 20th:

wild dreams: festival, snowboarding and catching myself with my hands over a deadly drop

spit-up day

nox's surprising family services offer, liking pokemon in spite of myself, the first bath-time where mr smear calmed down and let me dry and dress him without freaking out

the morning shopping expedition turned into picking up lunch with horseman, fending off old people who feel that touching my baby is their right, long goodbyes stretching into making viewers of our apartment wait for twenty minutes, their smelly feet and our moron landlord, still proud that i'm the parent changing our son's diapers without gagging, listing furniture prices, a long chat with my mom, law and order and pinching nerves

some people are pieces of shit dressed up as mouthwatering chocolate cake

sunday 21st:

wild dreams: flying over mountains on a board and picking up broken batman before escaping from the troll by yelling "it's a bomb!"

amazon payments bullshit
paypal bullshit
another illustrator bites the dust
freelancd bullshit
yellow jelly poop

Monday, February 01, 2016

the end of the first leave

it's sunday night, tomorrow morning i go back to work after a much-needed-but-still-not-nearly-enough week of parental leave...

sunday 17th:

haircuts, groping grannies and unwelcome mall mothers, home and heavy shopping


dream: trance dance hilltop, third day trying to return to the floor jumping in the public shower being unable to lock the door because some woman was blocking it then her boyfriend bullying me out, i tried punching him but was unable to cause him to so much as flinch after repeated hits to the jaw, leaving humiliated

3.30am lying in bed trying to understand why i haven't heard from the illustrator in a week

monday 18th:

beating yoshimitsu and almost beating devil jin in the tekken 6 scenario campaign and feeling really good about it

parental leave inspiration

bash success, a chaotic day at work, a walk to walmart in temperatures* that have migrated from "temperate" to "mean", but which were mild compared to those going home after dark

* including the wind chill factor, that's what was really hurting

rushed leftovers, a bath, a blur of an evening and then suddenly it was 10pm and he was in bed and we were getting ready for bed

tuesday 19th:

another long night, weird dreams and no more than an hour and a half of sleep at a time, mr smear making creepy, worrying movements with his neck whenever i put him in his crib

brief tekken, hunter x hunter and then hurrying to get ready for both work and laser treatment

a day of varied success, with some exciting progress in laravel; receiving authorization for taking paternal leave next week

both thomas was alone and limbo increasing in intensity to ridiculous levels

the dirty fist bump in the iga

the man walked out of the metro car, but his smell continued to fill it as intensely as if he had remained, to the point where breathing was a painful experience and the fear of leaving with his stain - whether by smell or by disease - became a very palpable thing

with gd ill the night flew by too fast, the pleasure of feeding an enthusiastic mr smear followed by the frustration of having forgotten to feed myself until he was in bed and the last thing i wanted was to risk waking him with the unsuppressible pings and dings of our toaster oven or microwave

wednesday 20th:

a gift from the illustrator

multiple wakings but feeling powered up after three straight hours before dawn; learning that while i appreciate dave chapelle as an artist i don't enjoy his comedy, taking back my morning with hunter x hunter and making myself a breakfast shake for the first time in days

a rushed morning and then an urgent call to come home (that horrible feeling that you're not going to finish your work before taking a week off)

my first time winter dressing mr smear alone and under pressure

no signs for the emergency room
a changing table two units over
cleaning lady blowing something in my eye as i walked past
waiting room giggles
long wait, unpleasant conditions, don't patronize my wife when she has a legitimate request and then remind her that there were issues with her when those issues were an incompetent nurse wiggling the iv needle twice and gd was simply the first patient to complain because her screams of agony weren't enough of a hint

lost winter gear (we thought we'd left it behind, but we hadn't), a bad metro driver

hardcore frontside poop and difficulty getting mr smear to bed before midnight

thursday 21st:

garbage day, dinner, sleep. or not exactly, managing to get very little of it and then suddenly it was 7am

calling in sick, struggling to deal with the fact that gd still needs help and that the hours in emergency were wasted because the doctor felt it was more important to protect his staff than his patients

dirty changing station
long wait with an autistic kid

being the parent of the child practicing vocalizations in a waiting room is a very different experience. i feel bad for anyone not feeling well, but it can be remarkably amusing and we're not going to shut him up when he's just starting to learn how to express himself

the $70 cost of not realizing it was thursday

putting on boots when bone-weary and warm and sleepy post shower
"didn't you pick up your prescription already?" is not a good thing to hear

going for one thing and then forgetting it and having to return
finally lying down... to rls

friday 22nd:

running into nox on the way to work who made me feel like a fool for even considering going, coming home to a family meeting with my mom and then gd's babysitting friend coming over to sign a photo and join us on our mission to passport canada and the police headquarters. both experiences were actually pretty good, the latter being especially impressive considering that we arrived without an appointment (nobody had warned us that we need to make an appointment) and they saw us anyway

hunter x hunter while amusing mr smear, getting him to sleep and eating quickly so we could join him

saturday 23rd:

not an easy night, taking a turn for the worse at 5am when mr smear decided that he was done sleeping

gd refusing to return to the emergency unit, vfmp giving us a hand with the shopping

sunday 24th:

the rest of the weekend being pretty restful, although we did complete an important form and put the old car seat up for sale...

freaks and geeks and a talkative mr smear

monday 25th:

nightmare sleeping disruptions compounded with misunderstood venting and an eye / ear scratching scare

laundry folding and first contact and sharing mr smear's first carrot experience with my mom (he's eating gratifyingly well) and printing. the realization that the experience of feeding mr smear was something i would've missed out on had i been at work...

what an exhausting afternoon and evening spent doing very little... which was kind of the point of taking paternity leave, but it's still weird.

tuesday 26th:

folding laundry, hunter x hunter chimera ant madness, finally getting into wii fit, setting up an interview, putting more stuff up for sale, bath-time happiness souring over a bad response
a long wait for a late doctor who wasn't particularly helpful, bad moods but a good feeding when we got home, a great dinner with horseman

wednesday 27th:

a long night, up early for a no-show interview, scary icy shopping run, flight scheduling, pseudo-resting, and afternoon of an irritable mr smear, a family shopping trip to a rude metro, dinners and a stealth side poop becoming a song and dance
we all have fantasized about meeting our clones, but that surreal moment seeing yourself in your kid is insane
taking out the trash followed by a long and difficult goodnight mr smear

staying up late to watch the last couple of episodes of freaks and geeks again with gd

thursday 28th:

a pretty good night's sleep, still tired but no more than i'm used to; a relaxed morning, a messy sweet potato feeding and then grabbing the opportunity for an outside haircut when the babysitter arrived

the man on the metro with what appeared to be an audio cable plugged into a port on the back of his head about halfway between his spine and his ear

p.m. delivery (it's the tofu skins she likes!), gd's horror over my haircut (i'm not allowed back there again), desperate nap and difficulty waking up for my meeting

the mind blowing revelation that i've talked about myself for hours and given away nothing of who i am (like my blog, except that i've been talking exclusively about my experiences and motivations)

friday 29th:

two decent nights in a row, an early struggle to get mr smear measured (a positive experience overall), gd's health rapidly degrading after mr smear's bath, nothing but stress

emergency post-toilet eye drops swim pharmacy run, ridiculous fails trying to get myself and mr smear ready to join gd at the clinic (lost mittens and the front of the winter suit going under my dirty boots)
the long evening in the waiting room; gd's birthday present excitement

finally, a doctor with a decent bedside manner who explained what everything actually means

saturday 30th:

three decent nights in a row

an unproductive morning followed by a family shopping expedition, an irritable mr smear who i suspect has a bit of a cold, a meeting of the minds with my mom about our trip to cape town

sunday 31st:

four decent nights, we may not be getting a full night's sleep yet but the situation has definitely improved

mr smear's first tooth is making an appearance!

a disappointing ending to a disappointing season of hunter x hunter (season five, i hope there's a sixth on the way)

a busy day doing not much, humid and warm inspiring us to finally clean the humidifier - and screw it up completely

it's scary planning details...

the post-shower rush to pick up dinner, good dinner, bath headache followed by hitting an ugly language barrier in a tense situation, a good recovery but needing to take something for the headache...

... and now to try and get some sleep