little victory dance

up until 14 hours ago, i still didn't have a paper. the idea that i exposed yesterday was far too deep to fit in to a simple final; it's worthy of a seminar both in scope and in the amount of research i'd have to do to back it up.

in short, up until today i thought i'd understood post-modernism. i sort of do, but i'll be damned if i have an inkling of what modernism itself is about in any useful sense. the paper i've written isn't good, but maybe it'll be good enough. otherwise, supplementary. if that's what happens i will definitely be choosing something a little less abstract :P

aside from a break yesterday afternoon, where i fled to pg's arms (there's nothing as soothing as a real hug) from a potential breakdown caused by excessive meta-thought, and she made soy-based sachlav which was pretty darn good. then i crashed for a short while, and felt a little better for it. i spoke to my mum, trying and failing to explain what i myself am unsure of, and then focused on my poetry exam.

i've done about a third of it, and it wasn't a strain, so once i've finished going over another paper - hah! me, checking papers as if i myself know what's potting* - i'm going to hit that again. boy, will i ever be glad to hand in tomorrow. even if i don't do as well as i'd like, i'm pleased that i finally got something out. i was beginning to consider choosing an easier topic.

* it's funny, but blogging all these years has made me pretty damn good at editing.

ruzz's wife helped me out with this one, too. over the phone, which was a lot more difficult for me than i expected :P
it's comforting to hear that compared to other departments we've done a lot, in her opinion more than a first year course in literary theory should.

i seem to be handling well, though. i've acquired a stack of papers and books that i *must* read but simply haven't the time for. as it is, i just noticed that i have about four editions of wired that i haven't taken out the plastic yet. that'll do for next week's snow trip ^_^

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speaking of soy products... i must thank my SO for getting me to buy soy juice. i've been drinking black tea for a long time, and it just doesn't taste as good.