not enough caffeine?

yesterday was a day in the oven. with the fan on.

i was completely bombed, having slept 3.5 hours after two nights of exercise and my thighs were agonizingly sensitive the entire day.
i learned more about .net security - namely that it's bleeding impossible to write a program that can access anything over a network, and i found out that the "richtextbox" is useful.

i also spent a lot of it horribly aware of my oversized belly, and the quantity of rubbish i consume on an hourly basis. am i eating because i'm unhappy? should i take up smoking again? [probably not]

i got some satisfaction from the c++ project, at least. the guy called to say he's very happy with it :)

we went to an event last night that was absolutely mind-boggling. i'm not going to discuss the ridiculously long drive in both directions, or the sub-standard food and terrible seating. the show itself was freaky: a lot of kids singing strange songs really badly, and they had a gorram circus on stage. like, juggling, and stilts, breakdancing... wtf?!?!

and the speakers were bored. and the MC doesn't appear to have a sense of humour so his jokes were out of place.

at the end we sang the national anthem. the creepy bit is that i *forgot* to salute - i'm still a bit embarrassed about it. at least nystire was standing behind me to hiss a reminder.

the laughter came at 1am, being dropped off at the train station. the girl who gave me a ride wasn't comfortable because she's afraid of the tunnel that i had to use. if this was south africa, or new york, or somewhere where crime is a problem... maybe i'd have been cautious. i couldn't stop giggling the whole way; especially when i entered and saw the colourful new lighting they've installed.

...

today began with a cranberry-flavoured energy drink, had a guarana break in the middle and ended with strong turkish coffee: i'm still completely buggered.

as it is i'm lucky i managed to reach my alarm after only half an hour of beeping, i had ten minutes to shave, dress and be outside waiting for the damn bus. i spent most of the day working on the fun project, and the last part of it breaking my head over irritating problems with other things.

no-go: nystire and i were on our way to oversee the culmination of a project we were responsible for last year, when we got a message from our SC: only one can be present. the man *really* knows how to improve motivation.

studies: because i have *no* clue if i'll be a civilian by the time the next semester begins, it looks like i'll have to forgo my return to academia this year. i'm not happy about that. i'll have to check out correspondence courses, but that's *so* not the same.

seeing as i had nothing to lose, i upset my TL by asking him if he'd allow me the time to study in spite of my non-adherence to the bureaucratic oath... he was mortified. i'm sorry to say that that didn't make me feel particularly bad.

shower, bed, and maybe i'll go out tonight.