Tuesday, December 03, 2013

the porsche story

apparently i've never shared the porsche story on my blog! how shameful...

hido used to work in a restaurant, and the owner developed a giant crush on me. he was an attractive man and very sweet, but i'm not that way inclined... over a period of weeks and months he made his intentions extremely clear, sometimes in a funny way and sometimes crossing the line of sexual harassment. i was always there to see hido, though, not him, so i just let it slide. aside from inappropriate solicitations he was quite kind to me (and the food coming out of his kitchen was delicious), and he certainly wasn't threatening so no biggie.

one day, a gorgeous summer's sunday, a few of us were sitting at a table outside drinking and having a good time, all the while eyeballing a brand new (80km on the odometer) porsche carrera parked right outside with the top down. we'd been ogling it for ages when hido's boss came out to say hi...

... and saw what i'd been looking at. it was his new purchase...

"hey, totalwaste. you can HAVE the porsche.
...
IF you'll be my boyfriend"

let me tell you, for eighteen year-old me that was mind-blowing - the next five seconds were some of the toughest of my young adult life :(

"i'm sorry, man, i'm going to have to say no."
i think i was almost in tears.

...

my buddies all had a good laugh then, and i'm constantly surprised by how many straight guys i know who are horrified when i tell the story.

"you did what?! are you mad?!?? you should have taken the porsche!!!"

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